Why can't my sister respect me? Why does she always have to be such an antagonist?

[Le_Franglais]

I don't know what it is with her, but she's always so rude to me, never respects the fact that I am older than her and always tries to argue with me, when, under certain circumstances, it isn't her place to argue with me.

She's 16, so it might be just phase of verbal aggressiveness, but it's been going on for far too long.

How can I make her realise that she needs to show me, and my parents in fact, more respect?

[loveBrowneyes]

she is in teen age so that's pretty much her attitud but that does not men that she doesn't respect u your parents must show her that you must have some respect and your are a guy and she is a girl she must be polite and evrything just whene you argue whith her talk about siriouse thing lik e that tell ur parents that they are the boss not her and they must punish her is she crosses the lemites ! that's all to be irrespectful for you is okey but for her parents is not okey she must know that

[Le_Franglais]

SHE DOESN'T RESPECT THEM.

My dad had angina a while back and was in hospital for weeks... she constantly stresses him out and swears at him.

She's an utter bitch to me and my mum.

Lmao... it's quite obvious you're favouring my sister because she's a girl.

[loveBrowneyes]

no not with her at all am with you totaly i swear
sorry but ur sister is a monster !

[ArabianPwincess197]

Try being nice to her. If you are nice and apologise even though its her fault, eventually she will feel bad and come to her senses. It could be a phase. I have a 16 yr old sis. We have our tiffs but we get along too and she never disrespects our parents, talk to her could be she's worried. You say she's 16 she'll be doing her GCSEs it cpuld be she's stressed, having bf trouble if she has one

[ArabianPwincess197]

It could be she needs to talk to someone but can't seem to approach you or feels alone. Show her you're there for her

[Le_Franglais]

My sister openly swears to my parents for next to no reason, she storms off to her room when someone doesn't agree with her, and then she complains pointlessly about what other people do to her, but then gets all uptight when someone complains about her and something quite serious she does.

I smoke, right, when she found out I did about 2 years ago, she rushed to my parents who got pretty mad at me.

Last year I caught her smoking with her "friends" and I didn't say a thing to my parents. I called her a hypocrite, and told her to grow up.

She always tries her hardest to pick fights with me.

[ArabianPwincess197]

Seems she wants attention. Try arranging a counsellor for her. Or if her behaviour is like this at school her teachers could talk to her or call a counsellor in. There are also sites like this one I counsel on where she can receive advice from. Not all of the people are professional some are still studying. Maybe that might help her

[Le_Franglais]

she's two-faced... she'll act one way with me and my bro and then another more "calmer" type with teachers and all that... I think her mentality has changed since she goes to boarding school.

[ArabianPwincess197]

Is she happy there. Did you go there too. Maybe she thinks its injustice if you went to a mainstream school

[ArabianPwincess197]

I read your comment below. Your mum needs to show her who's the boss. They pay for her stuff. Take away her pocket money, phone, ipad etc. Show her if she won't get her act together then she can leave the house, go to social services, it might work. Since financially she's dependent upon them, is she rude to ur older bro too.

[Le_Franglais]

My younger bro? He doesn't bother with her anymore, she's just too stubborn. I'm there trying to lay some justice down because my mum works a lot and my dad is 71 and busy all the time too.

Wish she grew up just a little bit and understood that even though she's a pubescent 16 year old, it doesn't mean she's the centre of the world.

[CommieDearest]

She doesn't need to respect you just because you're older. You probably rub that in her face anytime she disagrees with you. What is this, the bible? Lol. She probably is a little moody at 16, but you don't deserve respect just because you are a little older. Get real, if my brothers (who I get along with great btw) had tried that shit with me, I'd be lippy with them, too.

[Le_Franglais]

Ever heard of "respect your elders"? ... I respect my parents because A) they're my parents B) because I live under their roof C) because they're older than me...

"You probably rub that in her face anytime she disagrees with you" - nope I definitely don't, maybe I should come to think of it.

[CommieDearest]

Yes I have heard of respect your elders and your parents. Are you your sister's dad? How awkward that must be. Siblings operate on a different level, you're not afforded the same respect as a parent, and I can imagine that if you have that attitude, it probably rightfully pisses her off. It's possible you don't notice that you do it. Being condescending will get you no where with a teenager.

[Le_Franglais]

"Are you your sister's dad" - I'm going to ignore that stupid rhetoric question.

So I should just let her insult me, swear at me?

[CommieDearest]

You should ignore her. I mean, does it really offend you that much?

[ArabianPwincess197]

I agree with QA parents are parents. They brought us into this world, clothed us, protected and feeded us, gave us luxuries they could afford, the least we could do is give them respecg they deserve

So she shouldn't disrespect them. He's older than her she shiuld respect him even if he has his flaws

[Le_Franglais]

Of course it does, it's my sister from crying out loud... all she does is stir crap out in the household. My dad has angina and yet she still stresses him out and swears at him.

[kkkkkguldane]

As a older sibling older siblings should be respected it is there role also as an older sibling to be a goo role model so they should be respected they are not on the same level as younger kids but the siblings should all be treated equal by parents however between the siblings the eldest must be respected but the oldest should respect their siblings also. no swearing name calling or yelling is ok between siblings some take it to heart and it is also not nice I'm general.

[kkkkkguldane]

"she is young" I am an older sibling and my younger are the same some teens are mature and some are immature sometimes it could be the persons itself personality and not just teen behaviour.

[Blondiee2014]

She probably finds you patronising as you "demand" respect!
Because she's 16 she will rebel any authority you try to push on her, just ignore her she will grow up I a few more years :)
Nice profile pic by the way looks very professional and sexy:)

[ArabianPwincess197]

Agreed it does. For a min I thought it was him until I realised the screen name was in blue

[Blondiee2014]

Nah that's a model because it's a dude asking the question, she just looks super hot, I wouldn't have it as I can't stop looking at her :p

[Le_Franglais]

Not a model... she's an actress called Hayley Atwell. She plays peggy in Captain America...

My sister is a bitch end of... if you think I'm being patronising demanding, she doesn't give shit to my parents.

[Blondiee2014]

She's 16 she is gonna be rebellious.

[Le_Franglais]

Mate she's been this way since she was young, it's only worsened through puberty,

[Blondiee2014]

So was my sister mate I'm 24 in 6 days and she's now 21 , she is more mature than me now we never argue ,,, but we was exactly like you for the most part of a childhood. What makes her act worse is your letting her get to you rather than not giving a fuck, if you portrayed a energy toward her that said " wow you are making yourself looking pretty stupid right now as childish behaviour doesn't penetrate through me and our parents even the slightest, that's how she stops because it is teaching her how to behave rather than showing her that she can effect you so bad!
If my sister tried it now is literally just blank her and she would immediately think back at what she just done ( she wouldn't though she is now grown up);)

[Le_Franglais]

Honestly if my sister grows up I'll eat my crap infested pants for breakfast.

[Blondiee2014]

I'll hold you to that:))

[yaddayaddayadda02]

It takes two people to argue. Change how you react to her.

[Le_Franglais]

I don't swear at her, I just try to reason with her when she starts insulting me for no reason.

She always picks fights with me... she and my brother used to pick on me a lot when I was younger.

[yaddayaddayadda02]

She starts fights, you get up and leave.

[XNicholeMariex3]

I always believe that if you want to receive some respect, you must first show some of it.
As for her, she is more than likely going through something, probably something more personal and emotional that she is not being open about.

I don't know how much older you are than her, but siblings in general can't really force respect on to each other, it must be earned.

[Le_Franglais]

I give her the basic amount of respect you expect between siblings, and I don't get involved in her issues. We don't speak that much, but we argue a lot.

[XNicholeMariex3]

Maybe that is the problem, all you guys do is argue. Try having a normal interaction. It might be hard, especially for a 16 year old, but she might surprise you.

[Le_Franglais]

"all you guys do is argue" - we don't ALWAYS argue... never said that. She was an utter moron with my GF when she came over a week ago - she didn't even say "hi" or acknowledge her presence.

She's never done anything for me, all she's ever done is grass everything I say or do to my parents.

I've given her lifts to places, picked her up from a station and taken care of some douchebags trying to get in her pants, but I get NOTHING in return.

[XNicholeMariex3]

Then it sounds like she needs an attitude adjustment.

[Le_Franglais]

she's too stubborn for that.

[XNicholeMariex3]

That's too bad.

[xzinax2]

she doesn't need to respect you because you're older, and she's allowed to argue with you if she thinks you're wrong. you're not being very respectful by demanding that she just shuts up even if you're wrong.

[Le_Franglais]

LMAO... she swears at me... seems like you've never ever heard of "respect your elders"

[Metal189]

she has a disrespect issue?

[Le_Franglais]

Yes, towards me and my parents.

[Metal189]

then she needs to learn how to get some respect. she most likely doesn't get enough respect herself, so she lashes out at others in the same way, to show how she feels

[Le_Franglais]

She gets plenty of respect, she gets plenty of presents too, yet she's still a pain to all the family.

[Metal189]

eh, she's probably got deeper issues (where she still feels disrespected)

[pancakee]

did you frequently criticize her?

[Le_Franglais]

Never, unless she personally attacks me.

At dinner last night my mum was discussing how the woman in Sudan is being sentenced to death for "apostasy" ... We have this talk and I say "Men would get the same ordeal as this if they had left the Muslim faith" and my sister was like "Men don't get shit, they're so lucky" ...

I told her that what happens to men in these countries goes untold of because of the media here in the UK, and she tells me it's "bollocks" ... so I just left the room.

[pancakee]

ı think don' knock it. When she needs someone, I am sure she will want to talk you.

[Le_Franglais]

She never does.

[pancakee]

she is in puberty.her reaction is normal.

[Anonymous]

Maybe she have a reason to not respect you?

[ArabianPwincess197]

Hmmm

[Le_Franglais]

Like what? We barely talk, I don't know what's going on in her life - not that I really want to...

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe thats the reason? I talk with my older sister a lot and we occassionally go fishing, or partying together.

[Le_Franglais]

She's 16 mate, I wouldn't go party with her, and she certainly wouldn't give me the time of the day to do something like fishing... plus having an older sister usually means she's more mature.

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe show some interest ask her how was her day, does she need anything?

[Le_Franglais]

Lmao... no.