What to do when your boyfriend makes you feel insecure about your body?

Question

So last night I (17 years old) was just chilling with my boyfriend (18 years old) on the couch and was watching a movie. We were just cuddlingn and stuff, and he started making these comments that kind of hurt me (but I don't think it was his intention to hurt me though). One example is, I was laying on the couch on my stomach and made the commen that "it looks better in tight jeans", referring to my butt. I always thought that I and my butt looked good in those jeans, but apparently not. The problem is not the jeans though, my butt just looks like that normally which is why it hurt. Another example is that when I was lying on my side my boobs kind of came together and "almost" touched (I have A cup boobs and it is almost impossible for them to touch) and he mentioned that cleavagr looks really good, and that I "wouldnt have to do it, but he would like it if I did it for him" ? What does that even mean lmao, a boob job? A really expensive push up bra that can even push my boobs together? He also said "men naturally always like curves", while I'm basically curveless. These are just a few examples. I have always been very insecure about the fact that I'm not voluptious at all, but always got over it. But when he keeps reminding me of the fact that he even does not like my body, how am I supposed to accept it? Therefore I ask if anyone knows how I can still love my body, even though my boyfriend doesn't.

PS: talking about it with him is not an option, already did that with another issue and it did not change his behaviour.

noraphantom · Accepted Answer

ıf you dont like these things about your body too start working out you can get a good shaped but
for boobs push up is an option but for me ıt's no big deal and ıf you have for eample a bbeter but or u know how to dress yourself ıt's not that big of a deal
and for him ıf he ever does that again you can show him how angry ıt gets you (since he doesn't change his behaviour after talking dont try to tell how sad you get) and ıf still he doesn't change anything have serious talk about dumping him ıf he keeps being such an asshole ıf ıt doesn't work dump him nobody is more important than your happiness

ragequeen · Accepted Answer

Ugh. He sounds just horny to me. Making compliments of your body like that is not acceptable. I would feel sad and angry. If you can't talk to him, your only options are either to live with it or break up with him. If you do break up, tell him something that will make him feel sad, like telling him how you are already insecure about your body, and that you are disappointed in him for saying those things. Because honestly, we live in a pretty messed up society where all women feel pressured about their body and appearance. You don't need a boyfriend to make it worse for you.

bellpepprs · Accepted Answer

bully him back about his body and say: "now you know how I feel ". my ex boyfriend would comment about my body as well, he would say I would look fat at times, my private parts were too hairy (even though I trim) and more. Luckily we broke up before I could say anything

Dinnye001 · Accepted Answer

Well tell him to fuck off with it. If talking doesn't work. Or ask him if he can accept your body. Of not, again, off is the general direction in which he should fuck. Making somebody insecure about things he/she cannot change is a dickish move. Or maybe tell him his dick is not that big. Just to return the favor. Seriously, if he loves you, then he mist accept what cannot be changed. If he doesn't, why be together?

I personally like the body type you described (being a pilot, I am around a lot of girls that look like that) so it is not true that all men naturally like curves.

WiseTurtle · Accepted Answer

maybe start treating him the same way until he get borred and understand what's wrong with him.

Blonde401 · Answer

Tell him he's being rude as fuck! Also, I was completely curveless at 17... my curves didn't come in until my early 20s. I had A cup boobs... I now have D's. This doesn't mean it will happen to you but you have a normal teenage girls body! Fuck him and his bullshit, honestly.

BellePepper · Answer

If you feel like you can't discuss your feelings with him do you even have a relationship?

Anonymous · Answer

Honestly, leave him. I'm curvy and my ex complained that I'm too curvy that all guys look at me. Shitty boys always have something to complain about. I can totally imagine him telling his future skinny girlfriend that his ex was a ___ cup and she was also talented. I pity his future girlfriend already. Anyway, remember that many flat girls have loving husbands at home so don't worry, someone out there is meant for you too. But for now, leave this boy.

JustCallMeLeon · Answer

Try to warn him that what he's doing is not cool. One should like their partner the way they are and not try to change them to fit their preferences. If this fails do the same about his body and his dick. "Women like huge dicks that cum a glass of jizz". That will teach him that stuff like that can hurt.

MaiNameIsSunshine · Answer

Why are you together? He should love you as you are. He sounds like an ass. If you can't talk to him about things like this, you're relationship won't work in the long run. Communication is very important.

Sonjita · Answer

My ex boyfriend told me "Baby, I noticed you gained a little weight, I can help you lose it" and I dumped him immediately. You need a guy who will be CRAZY about you and your body, and not just accept it.

stellal7099 · Answer

If he love you you should be proud. It is not outside of girl but deep inside her heart. Imagine if a pretty but very rude and stupid no man would like her. Be yourself be unique. Everyone got good and bad.

drG_NePhyAplMa · Answer

i mean simplest thing to do is to find a guy who loves your body how it is. i dated a girl who stuffed her size A bra. i thought she was beautiful though because she was my type.

Yaman2002 · Answer

he is a dick and you should leave him, also I like shorter and smaller girls (in size not age, I am not a pedo😂) so "all men like curves" is wrong.

zombiebabe · Answer

find yourself someone who loves your body... and not someone who will constantly compare you with a totally different type of body and will make you feel insecure

Estef · Answer

You shouldn't make a big deal out of this. I don't think his remarks should make you feel insecure. If you're confident with yourself, no one can make you feel less anymore.

peawee68 · Answer

he sounds like a dick he should be counting himself lucky to be with you and tell you how hot you are. I bet he's not perfect try telling him his penis is to short and see how he likes it. don't let him knock your confidence

Geen88 · Answer

You deserve better. Look at yourself in the mirror and repeat " I DESEREVE BETTER"

DizzyAster · Answer

You need to tell him how this makes you feel. He might be oblivious that his words hurt you. If you do and he still does, then drop kick his ass. Nothing boosts confidence faster than a drop kick.

Anonymous · Answer

If a SO doesn't like their partner changing (gaining lots of weight) that is understandable. But saying something negative about the way she already was before they were together is bad.
And A cup girls usually look the best.

meganthemenace · Answer

Make him cut that shit out or dump him on the spot.

Anonymous · Answer

the amount of sensitivity on this post from both OP and from the people who answered is cringe worthy. do women think that a man can't love a woman unless he's 150% head over heels about his body?

you women are sick

Anonymous · Answer

He's an asshole. A good man would never do that. I know my boyfriend wouldn't. Leave him

desmond_sh8 · Answer

U just wanted to have sex at that moment... thats how it sounds like

lauren093 · Answer

if he doesn't likes your body that means your relationship with him is not serious

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