My husband admits he has a 'soft spot' for his best friends wife and says it's nothing. Is this common in relationships because he says it is?

[Anonymous]

my husband and I have always had a good relationship at least I've always believed us to, but in the last year or so he began to act a bit strange around his best friends wife, he'd get so excitable around her. He acts really helpful and will behave like such a gentleman around her (not that he isn't usually but more so around her) he will take her side when we all joke around together and I find it so annoying. And to top it all off he now talks about her a lot too. I decided to front him out about it and told him I'm sure he has feelings for her! He denied it at first but then said maybe he had a soft spot for her. He told me it doesn't mean he has feelings for her, they just get on well together and are just good friends. He said its normal for people to have soft spots for other people whilst in a relationship. But is it? I trust that he wouldn't cheat on me but is this normal?

[demonics]

Its normal. Ignore the womansplainers, irrelevant bitter salty spittoons. And get off your high horses ladies.

www.huffingtonpost.com/.../...cheat_b_5909882.html

Its like marrying a guy who wasn't EXACTLY your type but his bff has whatever your guy is missing, and you get the vajj tingles when you see *that thing* tattoos, long hair, physique, conversation. For a man it could be that she's more feminine, cute as opposed to beautiful, she's foreign, bigger, smaller, blonde blue eyes, redhead, less/more outgoing, less/more bubbly.

[10dsw]

Well okay... do you REALLY think that marriage is biologically feasible for any man? Men are not wired to be stuck to one woman for life... of course he's going to be thinking about other women and possibly even having feelings for other women (yes he likely DOES have feelings for her).

This is completely normal and if you expect your man to be 100% into your because you're married, then you need to get your head out of your ass :)

[10dsw]

You* my bad

[Asker]

I get what your saying. And I know for sure he looks at other women and he talks to friends about things like that. I hear him when he thinks I'm not listening and that I can deal with but the whole time I've known him I've necer known him to behave like this, he's like a horny teenager trying to impress her all the time

[10dsw]

That's completely normal. You married a guy in his 30s - a guy who is wired to [at his age] be screwing around with as many women as possible. Moreover assuming he is indeed past 30, his sexual marketplace value has increased tremendously and he is many times more appealing to women than he was in his 20s. So now he has a TON of options (just ask your dad) and he is locked down to 1 woman. Something doesn't equate...

[Wonderer89]

I think it is. I have no issue with any of my friends partners but there are two I particularly like, respect and think they’re genuinely great guys and I treat them as such. That doesn’t mean I’m doing anything inappropriate, want to sleep with them or would do anything if the opportunity presented itself. There are just some people you connect with or like more than others and it shows

[little_bird1]

Anything that you're not comfortable with is not normal. Some couples are even fine with polygamy, for them it's normal and okay. So it all depends how both of you feel about the issue. If opinions and feelings about it are not compatible then it's not okay.

[Goodwifie]

Could be a little like a one sided emotional affair. My dad had one of those except the other woman had no idea.

[Asker]

What happened if you don't mind me asking?

[Goodwifie]

It was a work colleague of his.
My mum noticed that when ever they had a work function, partners inculed he would pay heaps of attention to this particular woman. It just got worse from there until one day instead of saying my mums name to get her attention he said the other woman's name. Shit hit the fan, he only then relised what a pick he had been. Mum resented my dad for a long time. Eventually my dad retired from his job and now if he wants to go to his old work place he'll ask my mum first. My mum was complaining to me about it and I replied with a positive attitude of "well at least he asked you first ".
Don't think you're husband relises what he is doing.
You'll find some great articles on this online, find one and get your husband to read it.

[modeve]

It is often said that others' wife and own children are praised and preferred. It is probably universal on part of husbands.

[philipph]

I see this as a red flag
A symptom. that he is not fully happy (can also be just personal problems)? 🤔

[Listening5]

Nah, you are his woman. If he went along with this, would be considered cheating u know

[OkayThennnn]

Not all men but most men are dogs keep a close eye just in case.

[Asker]

I appreciate that he was somewhat honest but just wanted to see if it's 'normal'

[Izumiblu]

Well its better than him having a hard spot.

[PoliceLivesMatter]

So funny 😆

[zazuun]

It's not normal for him to behave that way

[bondobilly]

Be glad he doesn't have a hard spot for her

[Anonymous]

Not in the way he means. And shouldn't be over you

[Anonymous]

i think it is not normal

[ashsandhu]

Maybe