My boyfriend doesn't want to marry me because of my past? What should I do? (Page 3)

Question

My boyfriend's is the only man I've ever loved, he helped me through the darkest period of my life and I want nothing more to marry and start a family with him. The problem is one of his friends recognised me and told him about my promiscuous past. My boyfriend has only ever slept with 2 other women, both of who he loved so I kept this hidden from him. He has this idea that marriage with a promiscuous women will fail so has given me an ultimatum. Either I stay with him with the understanding that he will never marry me or we end our relationship. He also says that he has to be upfront with me about the fact that he has reputation for being respectable and that if more people in the future recognize me as "someone they banged" he would break up with me. Leaving is absolutely not an option for me and I've begged him to change his mind but I don't know what to do next. It feels like I have to make an impossible choice.

pleasestopthis · Answer

You have nothing to do. Just choose one of the two options. Unfortunately we all have to face consequences for the things we do... you may stay with him with the hope that he changes his mind but I suggest you don't.

ITGirl95 · Answer

Meaning that even if he stays with you and a woman which he sees as fit enough to marry comes along then he'll leave you? Its not worth it. I advise you to move on to someone who will accept you wholeheartedly.

GGasks · Answer

This isn’t a respectable man. Your past is your own and you’ve already stated that he can’t give you what you want, being marriage and a family. You’re young, don’t settle. Especially not for this guy

slatyb · Answer

This is abusive. If you want to be married someday then end this so you can meet someone capable of loving you fully.

DragonsFly · Answer

Love can actually change a person. I used to be a flirt before my boyfriend came along. Now, I don't even imagine being with another man or flirting. It is really unfair to you because I know how you feel. I'm sorry you're going through that.

Anonymous · Answer

Well, if he plans to get married at some point in the future--which he'd have to do if he's "respectable"--then what happens? Sounds like you choices are break up today or break up a bit further down the road.

Anonymous · Answer

Lots of simps in the comments section... a man with preferences and standards = asshole. But most women have a whole laundry list of expectations and it's fine.

Anonymous · Answer

I had helped a girl in her most difficult times , somehow in the process I feel in love with her. I was a virgin she was not still I loved her , you know what she did she virgin shamed me , I will never marry a promiscuous girl , they are not worth the marriage , there’s a price of promiscuous past , you should be with a promiscuous guy not a good guy

smg99 · Answer

@rose004b: no I know it can be without the relationship it's just per having any romantic liaison. So we are unworthy because we Dreamt?

donniepineda · Answer

If you're planning to marry for love. Then don't wait for him to break your heart. Look for someone who will love for who you are and not judge you for who you were.

GraveDoll · Answer

Leave him. Why stay with someone you have to walk on eggshells with? I also dont do ultimatums. Ever.

Juxtapose · Answer

What a moronic prude. Dump his ass and find someone who will appreciate your experience.

SexyAshh · Answer

The only thing you can do. Time travel back and change it

Inexpensivefurniture · Answer

Oh you gotta just throw the whole boyfriend away. If he's ashamed of you why would you want to stay?

ShineDJJ · Answer

If this guy focuses on how you used to be and is so worried about his "rep", then he deserves to die alone.

Emily_925 · Answer

Tbh he sound kinda judgmental like its not his business

Piteka5 · Answer

I think at this point you should have already proven him you've changed, I don't know why he doesn't see that. I say, stay with him for now, he will see that as uncontested proof of love and must rethink, he needs to know you've changed

LuluLouisa · Answer

I would say leave him if being married one day is what you want

bang678 · Answer

I'd leave him. He clearly doesn't respect or love you.

Enpassant · Answer

If he can't get over your past, you need to move on.

BluesheepOwl · Answer

Wow i would have left him a long time ago. Girl you must have a low self esteem to let a guy treat you like that. Get rid of him.

Dargil · Answer

Walk away and don't ask, don't tell next time, if you don't want to keep adding to the list.

PrettyRegular · Answer

I understand both. Marriage is not the most important thing tho. Be together for the rest of your lives and he will marry you eventually. Many people doesn't marry at all.

TheSpartan · Answer

How many men have you slept with? If it’s not particularly high (say only 4-5 men), then you might be able to plead your case.

Johnjiii · Answer

Very strange that he says that then wants a relationship with you.

Pejtu · Answer

If he married you  He would be The stupidest dude alive

InTimoreDei · Answer

The relationship is built on your lies. It was doomed from the beginning.

Thatsamazing · Answer

Nice job trolling. Your post is idiotic garbage. Go away.

Twenty2 · Answer

Thank you for telling your number! I won't marry you either.

cedricadedje · Answer

I think it's best if you just let it go, and marry someone else.

alice55 · Answer

Break up, if he don't want to marry it's because he don't see any future with you so

sol3456675 · Answer

He is stupid if he really loves you and really wants to marry you it won’t matter believe me you deserve more girl!

fred_durst · Answer

i am not sure if he is gonna change his mind you probably should try to find other guy , once you do , DONT lie again

Anonymous · Answer

So you’re not even 25 yet and has had 40+ dicks?  Girl you a hoe

AnimeMan205 · Answer

OUCH! He needs to LET GO of the past! If he KNOWS you love him, shouldn't that be enough? I worry for you! How sad! I hope he changes soon!

Anonymous · Answer

What is your body count? If it's high enough that people are recognizing you, then I don't blame him because that's gross. Let him find a self-respecting woman who shares his values and you can find a man-whore who shares your values.

jss123 · Answer

Your history should irrelevant to him. Yiu deserve much better. I have no idea who my girlfriend has seen, slept with. Its meaningless to me as long she doesn't cheat. The past is the past.

standardguy · Answer

Say him that you have changed for a long time already and that you will never cheat on him. And that he should be brave and act along to his heart and not along to that what others will think or say

up_64 · Answer

Move oon. Don't sob. If you didn't want to be promiscuous well you shouldn't have been.

iFarted · Answer

Time to find a new man if you want marriage, its as simple as that.

GuidoThePizzaMaker · Answer

You should break up with him and save both of you the trouble.

1828avaava1828 · Answer

Find a better man. Let the bum live his bum life

PumpkinSpiceisnice · Answer

I think you should end it. Best option for both of you.

oldoldold · Answer

You have done all you can. And do you really want to be with someone who cares more about others opinion than you

mdm11 · Answer

Your past brought you to him it sounds like he is not mature enough to be a part of your future so you should think about leaving him in your past.

Jltakk · Answer

Just respect his choice and move on. I'd make the same decision, to be honest

Azazeres · Answer

You have to talk to him about this. If he loves you, eventually he’ll change his mind.

red_knight · Answer

Omg. 1 I'm really sorry.. 2 I think your relationship is over so is the trust factor... Has he softened up?

Anonymous · Answer

40? Wow. The poor man deserves better. And you tried to HIDE it from him.

TheFlak38 · Answer

yeah he is a smart man. You only want to destroy his life with marriage.

bangyourhead · Answer

oh well. You'll find a beta bucks eventually... better get to work before you hit the wall.

GreenGold1992 · Answer

fuck him, if he's not willing to let it go, he's not the one for you

LuWe22 · Answer

I think he is more mad about the fact that you lied about it.

Thatgal4426 · Answer

You move on. I dont get the point of this questionsl.

Anonymous · Answer

He does not love you. Better just move on find someone who really does and would marry you no matter who you are where you come from what is your wealth or education.

Liam_Hayden · Answer

You should leave. A relationship built on an ultimatum is doomed.

_dude_ · Answer

End it with him, he turned out to ultimately be an asshole,

arrto · Answer

Well if he really loves you he will overcome that “problem“ if not fuck him there will be others... sounds a bit harsh... but thats life right?

Anonymous · Answer

Should not have kept that body count low. I don’t blame him

scooogy · Answer

When I read about your 40+, I instantly said to myself "holy shit".

My boyfriend doesn't want to marry me because of my past? What should I do? (Page 3)

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