Even if you care about personality more when it comes to romantic relationships, you still care about looks to an extent when it comes to this topic. Everyone does. I am tired of women saying they don't care about looks when it comes to romantic relationships. That is complete bull. For example most women will not get romantically involved with this guy even though he has a wonderful personality and is confident.
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Isn't anyone else tired of women saying lies like, "I don't care about looks when it comes to romantic relationships" ?
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
I think that most of the time when people say things like that, what they really mean is that their last in men isn't limited to what's considered traditionally attractive. Different people are attracted to different things, and people can also become attracted to people over time who they had no physical attraction to at first. They can become physically attracted to people because of things that have nothing to do with their physical appearance. They just come to associate that person physically with other things that they like.
The last guy I really fell for was one that I had no attraction to whatsoever at first. I actually thought that his facial hair was kind of gross. But then I actually got to know him, and he was really sweet and smart. (Admittedly he also got a haircut along the way, and I liked his hair better shorter than I did when it was long, as did he, but he kept the facial hair, which is what I initially found unattractive.) Most of my friends also thought that he wasn't all that attractive. One friend thought he was, but she also saw him on a day that he was dressed really nice. I was very surprised to learn how well he could clean up.
I know that you meant in most cases. My experience isn’t unusual. I only put it there as an example.
Most of the time, when people say that, they really mean that they won’t only date people who are considered *traditionally* attractive, and also that they can become attracted to people that maybe they aren’t at first.
In other words, relationships can work even if one party isn’t particularly attractive.
It may not be uncommon but still in MOST cases you know I am right? If it was so common I would have a girlfriend by now but never had one because most women only view me in a platonic way cause I am ugly
The thing that I was talking about requires you to bond with women before they find you attractive. It also requires that you have impressive attributes that aren’t physical.
There are ways to talk to women and get close to them without being seen as exclusively a friend. I could tell you about that if you’d like. That’s what the guy that I fell for did. We were never just friends. He made sure to avoid that.
If you have a lot of female friends, but none who are romantically interested in them, you’re probably behaving in a plutonic way.
If you’d like, I could tell you more about that. I’ve considered writing a MyTake about it.
Everybody likes me as a person a lot. Everyone thinks I'm chill, funny, caring, etc. And I used to have a couple of close friends but there were at different points and not all at once. Had a bunch of female acquaintances in my life though. And now some female acquaintances
So many women have told me they only view me in a platonic way cause they think I'm ugly. They told me nicely though. Most people think I'm ugly and that is why I am viewed platonically only
That's the truth for me. I had a guy friend who liked me but he was obese. I loved his company but he was too fat for me. I ended up marrying a underweight guy.
The is the truth for nearly everyone not just you. I hate it when women deny it. If they were correct than I would have basically had a girlfriend but never had one because I'm ugly.
Maaaan, you'd be surprised. If you have a BOMB personality, you're funny af and you treat her right, make good love to her (If it's gotten that far) you'll start to look beautiful to her.. Unless she's super shallow & in that case you wouldn't want to talk to her anyways lol.. I get what you're saying though, usually an initial attraction is physical appearance first. If you look that that dude on the picture, but you're on a stage doing comedy or at a gathering making a whole room laugh and she sees you after, I bet it's more likely that she'll see you in a different light.
i've seen too many girls go for ugly guys over good looking guys because personalities don't mesh. a good looking guy isn't going to mesh well with a good looking nerdy girl. a good looking shy guy won't either. so good looking introverted women choose extro/introverted men.
I don't care about looks as long as she isn't hairy or obese, but those are still qualifiers so I do care to some extent. When women say that they mean that you don't have to look like Brad Pitt, not that it is okay if you weigh 500 lbs and stink because you rarely bathe.
There are plenty of women though the lid though and say they don't care about looks AT ALL when it comes to romantic relationships. Like I said EVERYONE cares about looks to an extent when it comes to romantic relationships and sex.
That is not only applicable to women though. And there are people who are no interested in physical attraction at all. There are people who are attracted to intelligence.
That is bull cause everyone cares about looks to an extent when it comes to relationships. I did an example of like the guy in the pic. Most women will not get romantically involved with a guy like in the pic
That's a fallacious and stereotypical argument since not everyone does. I just stated that sapiosexuals exist who are only attracted to intelligence. There are men who are married to subjectively unattractive women because they are highly intelligent women and those men are attracted to that. Women can be the same way.
I feel the majority of women desire a subjectively attractive man with a genial personality which is reasonable. She wants someone sexually arousing and someone whose personality she loves.
By what you said towards the end the women want a subjectively attractive man for a romantic relationship proves my point. How about I clear this up for you. Since sapiosexuals are a very low percentage, let's say NEARLY everyone cares about looks to an extent when it comes to romantic relationships.
Everyone cares about looks to an extent when it comes to romantic relationships. A lot of women actually say the bullshit lie that they don't care about looks when it comes to romantic relationships.
I have found it's usually PUAs that say that more than anyone. Virtually all women I know admit that looks matter. It might not be the most important thing in terms of staying power, and the women I know do say this, but they also say that looks matter.
I was hypotechinically speaking. It was a pic from Google. I don't know him. What I am saying is if that guy had confidence and a wonderful personality most women will still not get romantically involved with him.
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