My Boyfriend Calls Me Names (stupid, dumb, retarded, ugly) but Always Says He's Joking. Should I be Concerned? (Page 2)

Question

I've been dating someone (21M) for 2 months (we've known each other for 2 years but have been dating for 2 months) and he always calls me (24F) names like stupid, retard/retarded, dumb, ugly) but says he's joking/kidding every single time. If I make a mistake, he'll laugh and call me stupid, dumb/dummy, or retarded. Or sometimes I'll ask him a question and his answer no matter what the question is, is "because you're ugly" or "because you're dumb/stupid". I'll ask him why he's mean all the time and his response is "[my name] I'm just kidding/joking" or "I'm just joking around" and the way he says it is like it's obvious that he's joking. But it's getting to the point where it doesn't seem like jokes anymore. On the other hand, he'll compliment me tons, telling me I'm beautiful, gorgeous, cute, adorable, pretty, hot, sexy. I'll send him selfies and he compliments me on all of them. Or when he sees my body, he'll compliment me like crazy. He also won't add me as a friend on Facebook and hasn't told anyone he knows about him and I. One other thing that kind of hurt me was one day at work, he and his coworkers were talking about vegans and that they're crazy. I'm vegan and he knows that. He's not vegan though. Instead of defending me or saying something positive about the lifestyle or me (as I'm the only vegan he knows), he said something along the lines of "I know a crazy vegan too". So I'm unsure about what to do because I have feelings for him but I feel what he has done and is doing when it comes to the insults may be abuse. Should I be concerned? What do I do? TL;DR: My boyfriend of 2 months frequently insults me but says he's joking every time but on the other hand, he'll give me tons of compliments. I'm unsure of what to do because I have feelings for him but it seems like his constant insulting may be abusive. Should I be concerned? What do I do?

osili · Answer

Of course you should no one has the rite to talk down or yelled at by no one man nor woman

MoscowMitch · Answer

If it bothers you it's not okay. Time to lay down some red lines, or better yet give him a one-way ticket to You're Dumped.

gibmonies · Answer

Lol you retard tee hee. Aw I didn't mean it. by the way you look ugly af today, looks like something died on your face. Hehe im kidding sweaty. by the way veganism is stupid af and im not kidding.

Nikki1989 · Answer

I would have dumped him already.

Duuuuuuuuuude · Answer

yes. respect is the one you need.

pony1800 · Answer

It sounds like he resents you for something

Cherokeehp · Answer

Dump him.

PixyDust · Answer

How rude of him.

Anonymous · Answer

don't make a big deal fatso

ezale27 · Answer

Leave him.

My Boyfriend Calls Me Names (stupid, dumb, retarded, ugly) but Always Says He's Joking. Should I be Concerned? (Page 2)

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