Why do men complain about women only wanting men for money even though they only want women for sex?

[Anonymous]

"Women only date older men for money" and "men only date younger women for sex", right? Guys on here have literally asked what's the point of being in a relationship for a guy if not just sex.

[TDDMS]

The reason why men primarily complain about women wanting men for money is because the money a man makes translates into hours, blood, and sweat. Hence if a man makes $20/hr and he takes he and his woman out to a dinner that lasts one hour, that means he lost 5 hours of labor for one hour of presumably pleasure. But if he doesn't have a good time and instead that one hour he spent with his woman costs far more than the $100 because. . . . well how does one calculate a bad experience in dollars? It's difficult to do. Unless he ends up with PTSD and now has to go to a therapist, which in this case he can now factor in the cost of the shrink.

However, sex on the other is a physical activity that benefits both men and women. And is a necessary and common activity that men and women engage in. It's on par with eating and going to the bathroom. One can look at the economic cost of birth control, but honestly, birth control these days is so cheap that it does not compare to the hours a man works. In my next of the woods, a woman can get a month of BC for $5-$10. And in my case where it's common for me and a woman to have sex 1-2 hours/day, that equates to $0.083-$0.167 per hour for $10/month of BC. The financial cost of having sex is much lower than going out to dinner or supporting a woman.

Now moving away from this example, another reason men complain about women wanting men's money is because here in the states many women are massively irresponsible in handling money. Everything from overpaying for a college degree, burying themselves in credit card debt, living beyond their means, buying expensive cars, etc., etc. etc. And culturally what do American women do when they run out of money? They commonly go to their fathers, boyfriends, husbands, and in worse cases they resort to the government for their bailout (aka welfare). As a cultural contrast, an ex-gf from China, she put money aside to buy an expensive ornate Chinese rug when she was here in the states. How often do you see American women putting money aside to buy something they want? Also, she hated it when I would use my credit card. She couldn't calculate interest rates or the total bill, but in her mind using credit meant that I had to work more to pay for the extra fees, which meant, in her mind, I could very well spend less time with her.

So in the end, this is in nutshell is why men complain about women wanting a man's money.

[bluetoblack99]

Because wanting someone for sex vs someone for money IS NOT THE SAME THING.

At least it’s biologically natural to want to have sex with someone. As picky as woman are THEY TOO have that occasional impulse/) fantasy. There are guys (usually famous ones) they would love just to have sex with and nothing else if given the opportunity.

Using someone for money is a completely different story. It shows you are selfish, lazy and worthless piece of sh*t because you don’t have the self respect to make it on your own.

nNow if you live in a 3rd world country were female oppression is a real thing (Middle East) than that’s a different story. You need a man to survive. But if you are female and live in a 1st world country were women are not only given equal rights but plenty of additional one sided benefits than you have zero excuses.
It’s not fair to compare these two.

At least sex is supposed to be a mutually enjoyable experience (maybe more so for one person than the other). But when it comes to spending money on someone that is completely ONE SIDED.

[likelyOK]

If u use someone for sex it is the same amount of useless selfish and it does make u a piece of shit if she does not want only sex

[bluetoblack99]

@likelyOK both are bad. But guess what both men and women are born with sex drives. It’s natural to look at someone and desire their flesh despite their personality.

Also some women DO use men for sex. It’s much less common but it happens. It happened to me once or twice when I was younger. It did leave me with a bit of an empty feeling. But it was absolutely nowhere near as insulting and infuriating as dealing with a freeloader. I outright ghosted a girl for that bullshit (she didn’t even say thank you when bought her meals)

Human beings are NOT born with an instinct to take advantage of someone else financially. That’s an opportunity born out of laziness, lack of respect, greed and selfishness.

I doubt you are going to listen to my insight. I think you just want someone to agree with you. But really if want people to respect you more than you have to listen to their side. Also being a freeloader makes you a 100% supporter of patriarchy. It shows you have no monetary value in this world beyond your body.

[likelyOK]

There is some women looking only for sex but MICH LESS COMMON but you can’t make one worse than the other. Taking advantage for sex is just as terrible as money you just don’t see it that way bc you are less likely to be the victim of one over the other and it’s SMALL MINDED

[bluetoblack99]

@likelyOK have you ever you had someone you were dating take advantage of you for money?

[likelyOK]

No but I’ve made more money then the person I was with before

[bluetoblack99]

@likelyOK by the way I was raised to have a “conscious” with women and not make them feel like objects. I had my family, community and my church pound this into my skull from a young age. That made me into a “nice guy” who was sensitive to a woman’s needs and I was supposed to make her feel special.

Well how do you think that approach worked for me in my teens and early 20 years when it came to dating? Take a wild guess. Really.

I can tell you right now women are complicit in the problem you are complaining about. Many of them subconsciously welcome it. Men don’t subconsciously welcome a drain on their bank accounts.

[likelyOK]

Wtf do u mean they welcomed it? No U don’t sound like a man who was raised well , u Sound like a man who feels entitled and who uses biology as an excuse for men’s poor behavior, bc their are good men out there and they don’t sound like you

[bluetoblack99]

@likelyOK I have never in my life led on or lied to a woman just to get laid. I might have been tight lipped about it my intentions but I was never a liar.

When I was 21 I had an opportunity to deflower a beautiful 19’yr old virgin in a dorm apartment I had (step up from a dorm room). She was both excited and nervous. But I stopped. I said “you don’t deserve to lose it in a dingy dorm room. Let’s plan something out and make it special”.

Well she did lose it a month later and it wasn’t to me. It was a typical random fuck boy who broke her heart. She just couldn’t STFU about it later too. The friendzone was my reward for treating her well.

Anyway I see you are not open to hear my perspective. I’m sorry some asshole took advantage of you but trust me there were signs he was like that you didn’t see earlier. He was too funny, confident, etc that you overlooked his bullshit. It happens but it’s not my fault if that’s the decision you made. I know no one felt sorry for me when I was being milked by a worthless freeloader. If I openly complained about it I would be considered a “chump” not a victim. I took it as lesson learned and to be on the look out.

Anyway best of luck. But if you really want to avoid future pain you need to do some deep thinking and be open to the possibility that there is something you need to change.

[likelyOK]

Yeah but making excuses for past poor behavior means you really are not focused on the church and you need to spend your time examining either your morals or follow a more spiritual path. Or maybe just be honest with yourself you really are not not the “good guy” you think you were raised.

[bluetoblack99]

@likelyOK I’m not making excuses for my sexual behavior. Believe or not I really would like to hold out and make it real with a woman. But that’s next to impossible to find nowadays sadly. As a man I’m under pressure to do it early not just for my own gratification but to SHOW HER WHERE I STAND to avoid the friendzone. Modern women see chivalry as weak and they friend zone and exploit. The last three long term relationships I was in sex happens in the first three dates. We then discovered we liked each other for more than that and kept dating. Right before hooking up my last ex I said “hey I’m kind of getting sick of the hook up culture. I hope we can hang out after this”. Her response was “let’s have sex now so we can have sex again”. So go figure.

But I can tell that as man there as absolutely positivity nothing worse than holding out for a girl, treating her very well, not pushing sex, being kind etc than having her bored and run off with some fuckboy and then just assume I’m fine with the friendzone. Absolutely the deepest insult a man can take. And don’t tell me “well she was just the wrong girl”. No in modern times more women are like that than are not like that. I’ve been around a lot longer than you and I’ve see all sorts of bullshit.

Anyway best of luck. And for future reference try asking people questions vs personal attacks like calling me a scumbag. I know that’s popular thing to do in politics nowadays. But seriously all you do is piss people off and they get more set in their ways.

[sassy777]

It's 2020 my biggest concern is in a country that you can have whatever you want as long as you are creative enough to figure it out. Why is everyone still playing games? As an adult you should say hey this is what I'm looking for yes or no? Cause believe me there are people out there for anytang you want. Wether it comes with a price , a deal , a negotiation , etc. So you just wanna fuck and chill when nobody else is available say it. If your wanting to be serious and get tied down say it. If you need a place to live and for your po to check on you just say it. Everybody is fucking everybody. Stay woke. The day they aloud nudity on public television is the day all hell broke loose. So say what you mean alow the other person or persons decide if they want that. All respect is kept and we are all happy. Now here is the good news. If you can't find person x to full fill what you want there is always robots. Boom problem solved. Now are we all going to bitch less and be happier? Ha I think we all thrive on drama and attention. Whoever comments on my shit do not call me a cunt that is a very disgusting word. Yw 😂♋👠🆓💃💕😘

[Myk13]

As an adult you can say exactly what you want from another. As long as both parties are being honest with themselves. It’s an exchange of services type of deal. It works, as long as both parties are getting what they want.

[G3tAClue]

I totally quit dating for a while because every guy I went out with for a while had lied to me about his intentions. Once we had sex, he would ghost me. I didn’t meet a truly good guy until my current boyfriend.


I’m sure gold diggers lie and pretend to like a guy just to get his money. People who lie to get someone’s resources are the lowest scum on the earth. Unfortunately, there are millions of these types of manipulators who ruin dating for the rest of us.


All you can do is get good at figuring out which people are lying and who is genuine.

[David_Kek]

Have you considered you're just bad in bed?

[G3tAClue]

Lol of course I have, but I’ve also been told that I am great. But my goal was not to be the best in bed, I wanted a good man as a companion. Not someone who fucks and runs.

[G3tAClue]

But even if I was bad in bed, why is it my fault that guys lie about their intentions?

[David_Kek]

Some people lie outright, others just change their mind. Like when you see a really nice jacket in the store you'll automatically think about it and tell yourself you'll wear it to this that and the other, and then you try it on and realise it doesn't feel as comfortable as it looked in the window.

Some good advice I got about succeeding by learning from your failures, is to reconsider you're right when everyone is repeatedly telling you you're wrong. At a certain point, statistics will prove you wrong occasionally, no matter how right you think you are.

[G3tAClue]

I get what you are saying, but that still doesn’t justify people who can’t be honest or real with you. I get you don’t want to waste your time or waste other people’s time, but a simple “I’m not into it” would be appreciated so I’m not left wondering what is wrong with me. You know?

[David_Kek]

I do, but the world and human nature just doesn't work like that. How many times have you gone to a restaurant or bought something online that you really didn't like after to the point of deciding to not buy again, and then actually went to the effort to complain and give a detailed list of what was wrong?
People just don't bother unless it's in their interest and they know their criticism will be accepted. It's kind of an unwritten rule than unless you've been in a serious relationship with someone, you don't tell them why you're rejecting them partly to spare their feelings, but mostly to avoid an angry response.

You only ever really find out about your flaws that everyone has a few of, either after a breakup of a serious relationship (not always though), or when you actually put in the effort to find out what you're doing wrong yourself.

[jennifer_bloom]

Most people will hate you for telling them they are wrong even if the know they are wrong just because they can’t view themselves in any kind of negative light

[pervertedjester]

I can totally see why both sides do that. Life is all about maximizing resources.

[OlderAndWiser]

Do you think that all men only want women for sex?

[heyheylele]

No some people want home a solid to hold theirs at night

[Asker]

No, not at all. I dont agree with anything I just said. I just wanted to see what people would say.

[ChiTown33]

I see so you're just trying to start fights. Typical woman.

[Asker]

@chitown33 Most trolls are male tho.

[heyheylele]

No but that’s a factor

[Desconhecida]

I dont agree with both statements

[Anonymous]

Its not complicated actually.

Here is what you need to do if you want to understand:

From now on, every time you ever hear a woman list wealth or status in anyway what so ever as being a requirement for them dating a man make a mental note.

And every time you hear a man say that some sort of physical characteristic like big boobs or whatever is comparable to the money thing as being a requirement for dating you make a mental note of that.

I will bet you my kidneys that the female tally will outstrip the male tally by a fucking landslide and that is before you consider the other fucking obvious reason, that women want sex too.

Where the fuck do you get off defining a human being in terms of how much stuff they can give you as a personal quality?

Pretty much every woman out there does this with a straight face and then you have the gall to post a question like this?

Its actually disgusting how sexist you are and its way past time that you started getting called on your bullshit.

[Anonymous]

I don't want a woman just for sex. But I don't care what girl reads my answer and gives me a thumbs down on my comment, sex is an important part of a relationship. Intimacy with your spouse or significant other is not a bad thing. But money is different, we need money to live, we need money to have a roof over our heads, I'm 30 and still haven't had sex so I can survive without it. I mean I love food but that doesn't mean I'm going to eat at a buffet everyday. Girls and women can't just assume all guys/men want sex for the only purpose. Yeah, of course, in today's world, people don't care about others and some or many (depending on their state of mind) won't care getting attached to one person. I can't speak on behalf of everyone else on this site or in life, but girls/women shouldn't assume. Yes, a guy/man who pursues a girl/woman is not looking for a dude friendship. But I look at pursing a girl where do I find her attractive, is she a good person overall, have a decent educational background and has good values... That's it. I don't care if a girl is 5'3 or 5'10, I don't care if a girl is 115 pounds or 135 pounds, if I love and care about her that's what matters most to me. So girls/women out there, understand that, you can't paint all males with one brush.

[Adam1978]

First of all that is not true, we don't only want sex, we want more then that, you will on other side have hard finding a guy that bothers with relationship and don't want sex. Besides why would you want a guy that doesn't want to have sex with you? It's extremely rare that a woman can't give sex so it's something she can always provide if she wants. So she has it available and can't really run out of it. Money on the other side is a limited resource and something she should be able to provide for herself, supporting kids is one thing but why should she not be an adult and provide herself. If she dates for wealth she is unable to earn enough to satisfy her own greed. It's a bad characteristics. Why shouldn't we reject that.

[jns004m]

It is sad, but yes there is people out there that will agree with your trolling question.

I also belive it is a certain maturity level to this. I know that I went through a phase where all I could think about was how many girls could I rack up.

Pains me to look back on that mindset but now as I matured all I want is someone to value me just as much as I value them. To be as dedicated as I am to living life together. I don't care about status' (relationship, marriage, etc). As long as we are both emotionally connection and invested thats all that matters. Still waiting 😔 The important thing I have learned is to not make finding that person the goal but rather to be focused on becoming your best person. So, when they come along you are ready.

[Finchie40]

Only selfish insecure people complain. Every guy isn’t in it just for sex and not every girl is in it for money , the only people that think that way are selfish insecure people. That think grass is greener on the other side. When you meet someone that values love and relationships and removes selfishness then money and sex shouldn’t be an issue , when money and sex become an issue then that’s where it goes wrong. Those are the people that will never know what love truly means cuz they are in it for themselves when you want Something without giving In return that person should never get into a relationship. A relationship should be a team , you are in it together. Actions speaks louder than words.

[Miristheiss]

SEX?
You mean her actual body?
Mating?
The thing every life form on the planet strives to do?
Sex is love for many men.
Sex is not a thing... like pizza.
Joe wants pizza everyday but Jess is fine having it once a month.
It isn't some outside thing... it is wanting you.
If someone wants to have sex with they desire you... your living body and all that makes you up.
Money is an outside thing. We need food, clothing, shelter and air.
We do not need lots of money.
She is wanting some outside object that has nothing to do with him as a purpose.
Being rich isn't a real, life need like mating and reproduction.
Sex and love are tied.
Being wealthy is a corrupt goal.

[Sarahr123]

Oh please men always have one night stands and so do women and other forms of casual sex. Sex never meant love. But sex with the person you love can be extra special it just isn’t special in and of itself.

[Torari]

They don't. The only people who believe men are only interested in women for sex are women.
Men are probably even more idealistic and romantic on average that 99% of women when it comes to love. Men want to love, men want to be loved, and men want that love to be unconditional in both directions. Even if that's impossible.

However, that does not mean a man's particular interest in a specific woman can't be purely sexual. Some attractive women just don't have the personality or character to merit a long term romantic involvement.

If the men in your life are only interested in your tits, throat and pussy. Then look to yourself. What about you is discouraging any long term romantic interest?
Are you boring? Too high maintenance? Too fake? Bitchy? Manipulative? Entitled?

Always remember, if you think everyone else is wrong, you're usually the problem

[_SOARER]

Both are wrong, and both are very prevalent
Relationships, are about having someone who cares, trusts, and loves you. But all those things are the means. The End of the relationship needs to be Family. Marrying a woman and giving her kids.

Men complain because they can't get the woman they want with the money they make. Its just lust begetting anger.
Women complain about men using them for sex, or only wanting sex, because they see the sinful/lustful behavior, and they know it won't lead anywhere good.

In both cases, women use men for money because of greed. and men use women for sex because of lust.

Marriage does away with the sin, if done properly :)

[Guardian45]

While I'm NOT denying that what you're saying is sometimes true, I do deny it is ALWAYS true.

I personally don't look at the age of a woman, because that SEVERELY LIMITS my options. I have in fact dated younger women and up to 5 years older than myself. I do NOT usually 'match' as well with women my age or greater and I dont mean for looks, but for personality and likes! Women my age or older seem to want things I'm NOT READY for. I've ALWAYS been younger than my age not only in looks, but in personality too!

[Fatherhere901]

I think you're looking at this the wrong way. You're looking at everything men have asked to women. Have you ever considered the things that you ask a guy for?

Would you consider starting to make a list and marking down everything guys ask from you as well as everything that you ask guys for from guys? You gonna start to realize not everything men ask for from women is sex. And you're gonna realize How much you've actually been asking guys to do for you.

[BeenThereLovedIt]

SOME men prioritize sex over companionship
SOME women prioritize money over companionship

There's a million other gender-based stereotypes out there too, so there's a lot of dirty laundry on both sides of the closet, as well as plenty of clean folded laundry on hangars. It's all about which you are and what perspective you choose to take.

[MrOracle]

What you said is TRUE, but only for a subset of men and women. For the majority of the others, sex and money are just one of several critical items they value in a relationship, and the others are just as critical.

Certainly there are hypocrits - male and female - but that's the exception to the rule.

[Don-_-Don]

If we both were upfront about what we wanted to begin with without having to hide your true intentions by dating someone then it wouldn't be an issue.

But noooo, everyone has to lie for the sake of not looking about, despite the fact you will regardless because there's no way you'll be able to keep the lie alive long enough to get away with your hidden motives.

Ridiculousness.

[Asker]

I agree

[Anonymous]

Because sex is a natural thing, and really nobody should be denied. You kind of dont really have a say. I'm a man and I like women just the way I am. Women shouldn't 'punish' men deny sex to prove a point or being pissed about something, its not supposed to work that way.
Now money is money a man made tool to participate in buying goods to survive thats about it. Just paper with numberd on it. Although as it stands women only want men with money and if you dont have any, there's always an excuse either it be ugly creepy, no sex etc.

[snowboarder720]

It doesn’t HAVE to be only about sex. I feel that sex is important but it’s not always about it IMHO. That’s kinda the same way with women and rich guys too. Sure having money can be nice but it really doesn’t mean shit when the dude is an asshole human being.


Your question is judging to stereotypes of shitty humans.

[Reaperbot666]

it has been the way of the world for a long time. families used to marry off their own kids. in order to gain wealth and social standing.

https://www.theclever.com/15-reasons-why-women-love-older-men/

https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ux-WKpjzs38