Why is my roommate suddenly awkward around me?

[Anonymous]

after a night of drinking and honest talk with my roommate, she suddenly got awkward with me since then which was last week. we were talking about past relationships and she started to cry when she described hers. her ex cheater on her. i also told her I've never met a person who has never made me feel butterflies or even had a crush too. she's gone from happy and carefree to closed and stares at me a lot when she thinks i dont notice then looks away quickly when i catch her. she didn't seem too happy when i reinforced we are friends as well.

[MrNameless]

I'll repeat what I said in the response of deedeevour. What did you tell her its her fault for? For bringing up her past with her ex? That's like completely out of left field and doesn't make sense. She was opening up to you dude.

Maybe its not your forte, but it's an important skill to learn to be tact. Don't be a problem solver with women in these kinds of sutations. Listen. Don't tell her its her fault for bringing up "bad memories." Tell her things will get better and she'll find someone. She just wanted a shoulder to cry on. She might have feelings for you, or not. But it doesn't even matter. Anytime someone opens up to you like that, you don't shit on them. In the end, what's important in this world is human connection, not inatimate objects. True friends are hard to find.

[Asker]

well turns out she had another reason why she was awkward. she's normal again.

[DeeDeeDeVour]

A lot of women have trust issues. Your roommate spilled the beans about a critical time in her life. Now, she feels vulnerable and regretful. Unfortunately, that's gonna eat her up inside and you can't help her except tell her you feel sorry & somewhat responsible that you brought back a painful time in her life although you truly didn't intend to stir up any ill feelings. After you tell her that, don't try any harder. Just go about your way as you usually do. Let her process her emotions on her own.
Fair warning: This isn't gonna be easy.

[Asker]

nah i dont lie to people. i told her its her fault she took the risk. im not here to tell people what they want to hear. if she can't handle me being blunt then thats her problem.

[DeeDeeDeVour]

Who said anything about "lying" to anyone?

[DeeDeeDeVour]

So, you give her a drink, make her open up, get her emotional, tell her "it's her fault" and act proud of being blunt. Beyond insensitive.

[MrNameless]

Man... I don't know what it is, but many guys have this problem where they want to be problem solvers.. When all women mostly want is they want someone to listen and console them.

Telling her that its her fault is the worst thing you could have said, when she opened up to you. You gotta read the room and learn tact. You can't be brutally honest and open about everything.