Boyfriend often asks me to increase my size & told me he likes big boobs. I told him his questions are hurtful and he think I am being sensitive. ?

[Anonymous]

We’ve known each other since we were teenagers. We’re also each other’s first love and are about to get married in October this year.

Overall, He is an incredibly amazing boyfriend. He makes time for me, calls me for hours, takes me out, cooks and feeds me sometimes, buys me presents ( which I never ask for, and always hesitate to accept) he insists he likes spoiling me. He handles my anxiety issues and always has my back no matter what. He insists kissing me on my mouth even when I shy away due to obvious reasons ( morning breath) he’s even cleaned my period blood off of the sheets for me. He even notices when I do my eyeliner a little differently and makes it a point to tell me I look nice. He’s the sweetest.

But.. but.. lately since the last couple of months, he’s been asking me if it’s possible for breast size to increase naturally, and even though his question, no matter how sweetly and politely he tried to phrase it, caused a twinge in my heart but I didn’t tell him that. He’s brought it up a couple of times since then and last night he really just straight up asked me “can you increase the size just a little bit?” And then he went “ I like big boobs”... I actually went silent 3-4seconds and stuttered over my words because I wasn’t expecting that question let alone know how to answer it. ( he’s always known I am a 5’5 1/2 ft girl, my butt is like 37 but my boobs are 34B and he’s always said he loves them and they’re just way he likes it. So the fact that he was asking me these questions now few months short of our wedding weirded me out)
Again. I didn’t let him know I was tearing up and after the call I just balled my eyes out and decided to let him know that his questions & requests are belittling, and chipping way at my self esteem.

Updates

+1 y

So, I politely let him know that his words hurt me and he shouldn't keep saying that because he wouldn’t like if kept requesting him to increase the size of his manhood. I told him he made me feel like I was lacking and my boobs weren’t enough for him. Else he wouldn’t be so persistent with those questions but he got mad at me for “ over reacting” and being “over sensitive” and then telling me that he’s upset about the fact that I didn’t let him know this bothered me earlier.

Updates

+1 y

I told him I didn’t bring it up that time cuz I wanted to gather my own emotions, & didn’t want the whole thing to turn into a conflict, but even thought I approached him in a polite way, he was so disrespectful to me, called me a joke and said he wouldn’t be marrying me if he didn’t love me, & I should probably call of the wedding if he can’t honestly discuss anything with me & he was better of single.
I told him I didn’t wanna speak to him.
He called me up last eve and apologized.

[Lov2PlezUgurl]

Another communication breakdown it seems like most problems with couples can be solved through communication if you have no communication then you don't know what the other persons wants and needs are now he wants bigger boobs you didn't tell him that bigger boobs comes at a price he doesn't realize the pain and suffering that you will go through just to please him just to get one size bigger he doesn't realize that there's only a couple of ways to get bigger boobs one is to cut the nipple off completely and to stuff the fake boobs in through the hole and the replace nipple back on where for you will never have feelings in your nipple again or cut an incision in the side of your breast underneath your arm and stuff the implant in that way making your boobs fall apart when you don't have any clothes on making you look fake and deformed yeah I know a lot about implants and fake boobs and the anxiety that goes along with it of course if you use silicone after years they'll leak and cause you massive health problems until death not to mention the fact that in your mind you don't think that he loves you enough and you think that he has to have bigger boobs in order for you to keep him you may not have voiced this insecurity but it's there he broke your heart when he just came right out and said your boobs ain't enough I want bigger ones can you give them to me now if you don't want to give into this big boob fetish then you need to tell him how you feel communication is the key here you said yourself you didn't tell him that it made you upset and you cried your eyes out for probably two or three hours until you fell asleep most likely and when you woke up you felt bad as soon as you remembered what happened the night before if you had told him this I don't think that he will want bigger boobs over your emotional happiness this is just a fetish it's just something that he thinks he wants tell him you'll get him a pair and put them on the dashboard of his truck and he can play with them anytime he wants but as far as your body is concerned if he cannot accept you the way you are then he does not love you of course what you've told us about him he seems to be a very understanding person and would do anything for you if only you would tell him that you don't want these bigger boobs that he has to settle for what you have , you settle for what he has you may want a longer dick, one that is the size of a Coca-Cola can but nine inches long, you may want a shorter dick a less harrier dick you may want him to tone up his muscles or you may want him to grow a little bit more hair on his head but you accept him the way he is because you love him and you wouldn't want to change anything about him because of this explain this to him as you would a child that's what I tell people when I don't know anything about something I say explain this to me as you would explain it to a child that way you will cover all the bases and you won't skip anything of course I'm not saying treat them as a child explain it to them as if they didn't know anything about what you're talking about this is communication this saves relationships so many relationships have ended and we're destroyed because of communication breakdown my dad used to say son I can't read your mind you have to tell me these things or I can't do anything about them

[OlderAndWiser]

1. You apparently have a long-standing problem with low self-esteem. That can cause you to have clouded judgment and be dependent on someone who shows you attention.

2. 34B boobs are beautiful on most girls and many guys would be happy with you just the way you are.

3. If you get married,, you need to know that your spouse accepts you just as you are.

4. Your boyfriend's attraction to big boobs did not develop in the past few months. Matters of attraction simply do not change that quickly. That means that he has deceived you.

5. I do not recommend that you make a quick decision about what to do but you have a wedding date scheduled in a few months. Is it possible to postpone the wedding? This feels like it will be too much pressure on you, that would be unfair, and it could lead to you making a decision that you would later regret. You and he need time to sort through this issue and, if possible, re-establish some of the trust and confidence in each other which has been eroded with this event.

[Asker]

Literally ALL girls know that men are visual beings. MEN AND WOMEN both are aware of the fact that majority of men like big bosoms. But not everyone is perfect in each department, right? Wives don’t keep pestering their husbands to grow a few inches more and neither do husbands and boyfriends tell their girlfriends to grow their boobs. You love and accept people as they are.

Yes, I tired approaching this matter In a really civil and polite manner but was met with unnecessary aggression and I decided to not speak to him for a while.
He did call me up in the evening and apologized and said he knows he messed but but I don’t think I’m ready to speak to him for a few days. I need some space to re-evaluate my thoughts and think certain things through, and I’ve let him know that very clearly.

[OlderAndWiser]

"MEN AND WOMEN both are aware of the fact that majority of men like big bosoms." ABSOLUTELY WRONG! I have conducted several polls on this site, and there are polls posted elsewhere, and about 25% of guys prefer big boobs, 25% prefer medium boobs, 25% prefer small boobs, and 25% have no preference. "All guys prefer big boobs" is a myth like "all girls are bisexual" or " all girls prefer guys with huge penises."

[SueShe]

Never ever give in to a breast enhancement job because YOU will end up paying for it sooner or later. Not in money but with your health.

Any surgical operation bears a risk and such extensive plastic surgery is no exception. Your problems will start later in life when your back will gently start reminding you that you are taking a wrong position to compensate for the added breast weight. You are not taking a natural posture when you have oversized breasts that do not correspond to your size.

Even though you are not petite, you are not built for having big D-cup and bigger. A B-cup is ideal and should never be tampered with.

Be wise and place your health before his lust.

[Asker]

I don’t even entertain the thought of such things! I’m all about being natural, and graceful.
I’m pretty satisfied with my boobs and I wouldn’t even change them for free!

[SueShe]

If only all the girls that are pressured into doing a boob job would have your wisdom!

[collie22]

to bad he asked for bigger boobs. your the same size as me , i really don't want them to get bigger i lov them the way they are I think there just right

[caring__1]

It doesn't appear the problem is the size of your breasts; it appears the problem is the two of you still haven't taken the time to learn effective communication skills together. If he's perfect in all other areas, suggest the two of you see a professional who can teach the two of you skills necessary to avoid these misunderstandings in the future. It sounds like originally he was curious as to whether natural growth is possible. You could have responded "Not without pregnancy," and all would have been fine. Your lack of response led him to add pressure, which never achieves the objective we seek. How hard do you need to push a square peg into a round hole before realizing it won't work?

Basic communication skills aren't hard to learn, though make sure whoever you see is truly an expert in this area. Too often, therapists claim they are an expert, yet they don't give the necessary tools. Do your research and show your fiance you're willing to do whatever will help your relationship (without compromising yourself as a person in the process). Hopefully, working together on this will bring the two of you even closer together.

Both of you have sensitivities, and those need to be respected, but that doesn't mean we can legitimize dysfunction and just blame others. Hopefully, both of you will work to address your own challenges and make this relationship one that only grows deeper over time.

[RingOfFire]

Whewwww tough one!

My first impressions:
1. You didn't do anything at all wrong.
2. He was wrong for nagging you about it when it was clear that you didn't like the idea. This is your body we are talking about, not the color of the rug in the living room.
3. Don't know how old he is but I assume around your age. That's young. This is a mistake of youth.
4. If you didn't start off listing all of his good points, I might have felt differently, but since he has so many of them, I think this is something that can be worked out by talking it out. He can live without you having bigger boobs... it's not the end of the world.

Maybe you can tell him you'll clean the period blood off the sheets from now on as a compromise. 🥴

[Asker]

I’m not doubting his love for me at all. He was dumb for even mentioning that idea to me once let alone a couple of times. I plan on discussing this again with him, when I am ready because right now, I really don’t even want to hear his voice tbh. Also. The period situation was an accident and only just happened once. lol

[RingOfFire]

I'm sorry, I was just kidding about that last part. :)

You should definitely discuss it with him again, the sooner the better. Don't let it fester into something worse.

[TonyV]

That was a long read lol.

I can see why it bothers you, it makes you question weither or not he was lying when he said he liked then just the way they are.
And of course he should have been able to realize that when he said I like big boobs that he may as well have been saying "I dont like your small boobs", its seems obvious to me any way that a woman would basiclly hear it that way.

I'm glad you told him about it, cause believe it or not we dont always know when we hurt feelings.

[TonyV]

Oh and I dont think you are being sensitive or over reacting.
Well overly sensitive anyway, it's no secret that women are sensitive about the their breast size, wo. en think of their breasts as their womanhood.

I'm pretty sure almost any woman would be shocked to the core to hear there partner ask could you make them bigger, smaller, firmer, softer etc. . .
So you are sensitive about your breast size being judged, I dont see that as a problem, i dont think this one of those times you have to pretend to be ok with it.

[genericname85]

well your feelings about this certainly seem valid to me. i mean he's litterally telling you "you're not good enough as you are" in the subtext, which is quite devastating psychologically, even though he may not have evil intentions. though if he can't be satisfied with what you have, i'd strongly advise you to look for someone that is... cause there certainly are people that want you exactly like you are.

don't break yourself trying to please someone that doesn't want you anyway... hope that helps. i didn't read everything to be frank, so sorry if i ignored something important.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

You and him have too much history together for him to ask you such questions I'm sorry but I think no girl should make changes in her body if she's comfortable with what she has and she shouldn't do it to please any man... You would not believe how many Women go through problems and health problems from getting larger breast I think he's sneaking and watching some porn when you are not around and getting ideas
in his head

[boggboss]

Shit situation ofc anything like this will hurt but thatsvwhy you communicate clearly he didn't know u was botherd by him asking which yes is shit butbhow he reacted is no better have u spoken after this

[boggboss]

So whats next for you you have seen when things get heated now that he can say shit things is this what u want you need to discuss these things

[Asker]

I tried letting him know he was hurting me for a while now and I let him know that in the most polite and civil manner only to be met with remarks like “ I am dealing with a kid, I didn’t mean to hurt you” “ you’re making a big deal out of it” I am most definitely NOT making a big deal out of it.

[boggboss]

This is my point u 2 clearly need to have a conversation about this when u are both not heated

[Asker]

We will be doing that.

[boggboss]

Hope it works well

[Asker]

Thank you! 🌸

[msc545]

Well it seems like you have just a few Choice here. You could go and get your breasts enlarged if you wanted to surgically and tell him he has to pay for it. Or, you could tell him to go find a woman with bigger breasts and find somebody who actually appreciates you.

[Waldoe]

explain to him... you will love to be everything to him that he dreams of, but surgery has too many risks, infection, ugly scars, pain, un natural looks... and you cannot risk your health for such a small thing, then tell him if he adds 3 inches to his dick, you will gladly have surgery... he will shut up

[Famman89]

Its a bit rude to do that. Have a good talk about why

[Asker]

I know 😞

[Famman89]

The size doesn't matter really. I like smaller anyways.

[Wise4myage]

Yeah, 34B is a great size and he's a douche for saying what he did. You need to be honest with your feelings, and if the idea ever does appeal to you, than make him pay for a boob job.

[Wise4myage]

Well, he does have a point about you not telling him sooner, but its good that he knows because that should put a stop to this. I just hope you don't let it affect your self estteem too much.

[Wise4myage]

Yikes, well I hope things get better for you.

[Asker]

He didn’t ask me to get a boob job, because if he did, I doubt we’d still be together.
He asked me if it is possible to increase their size naturally. ( there’s no such way)
Yeah, I am not going to let this thing slide anymore. I’ve made it very clear to him that I am happy with the way I am. I love my boobs and I would never experiment with silly creams ( God knows what chemicals they have in them) and I wouldn’t even entertain the idea of going under the knife to have 2 bags of silicone placed under my already beautiful breasts. That’s not bigger boobs. They’re FAKE boobs and I’m not about all that. 💁🏻‍♀️

[Wise4myage]

Nice, I don't care for them either, it was just a suggestion. And I agree, nothing is going to make your boobs get any bigger at this point. Nice profile pic by the way, I hope he appreciates what he has.

[Asker]

How very sweet of you. Thank you. I hope we can work through this...

[Wise4myage]

You're welcome Tiffany, I hope so too. Feel free to send me a pm anytime. :)

[Needtovent]

Tell him you’ll increase your size when he increases his penis size for you

[Needtovent]

Please don’t marry this guy. You’ll regret it

[Unit1]

This relationship has met it's demise by your 2. nd update.

Time for a new boyfriend.

[Ilickvulvas]

Tell him since he doesn’t like yours he’ll never see or touch them again

[KrazyKem]

I'll be honest with you he is trash pure trash he should love you for who you are not who he want you to be

[Anonymous]

He is not your boyfriend, but an insensitive jerk. Your boobs are good as is and you deserve someone better than him.

[Anonymous]

If he judges you for your breast size, and doesn't love everything about you, i don't think he is the boyfriend for you

[NarutoUzumaki007]

tell him to grow a dick

[Asker]

I did let him know that he wouldn’t like it if I kept pestering him to grow a few more inches in that department. He did apologize later that evening but it shouldn’t have been my job to make him realize what was wrong with his requests and questions. It took a day to get through his thick skull. I don’t feel like speaking to him right now and I’ve told him I need space and not to contact me for a few days.
-.-

[andy530]

Tbh he sounds toxic af

[Asker]

He isn’t. He’s the sweetest. I just think he is dumb as hell when it comes to certain things but since he has an ego problem he has a tough time accepting he made a mistake. When someone tells you something you did or said affected them in a bad way, your job is to listen, and apologize. Not tell the other person that they are “over reacting”. You can’t decide what can and cannot hurt a person. They do, frikkin own up to it without any justifications.