Why Do Some People Think Only One Partner Should "Wear The Pants" In The Relationship?

Question

Now me, I say "F' the pants...

ohshee · Accepted Answer

Well it is kind fun both being in the same pair of pants ,, but it also depends on which way you're facing are both facing the same direction then you're going one way if you're facing the opposite directions is it battle cuz one person wants to go one way with his person wants to go the other way if you're facing each other I like that do I have to pee cuz I can never find the zipper... in my world you can wear whatever you want whenever you want both have to work together there is no boss I hate bosses I hate supervisors and if you're either one of those I wouldn't even be with her you got to be a team and work together you can't control anybody or anything else I used to race dirt bikes desert racing and when you're flying to the rocks in the Sagebrush at 80 90 miles per hour you have to be looking 500 yards ahead of at all times because you need to be able to take it on before you get there and you better be confident, because if you're not in one split-second it's over.. but if you're both wearing the same pair of pants and one of you bend over the wrong way and those pants rip then who's fixing the pants... seems like there's always something LOL

Not_Average · Accepted Answer

Naturally men are the dominant players in a relationship. If he’s not, then he will be unhappy with himself, and his wife will resent him. This whole 50/50 relationship scheme isn’t reality, and it’s a toxic way to look at a relationship. Men have particular biology that coincides with fulfilling a lead role in intimacy. Women have particular biology that coincides with a nurturing role. This is what’s natural. I think every other species in the world operates in this way in regards to mating including humans.

A good leader recognizes his teams strengths and weaknesses. A women is much better suited for particular duties in a relationship just as men are. It’s not a matter of superiority or inferiority, but rather recognizing that our differences make us unique. We should appreciate the dynamic of man and woman and appreciate our differences. They complement each other in a beautiful way.
Modern culture tells us that this is wrong. It’s no wonder the divorce rate is so high.

LeoPride93 · Accepted Answer

I feel people say that whenever one person in the relationship is more assertive or dominant than the other person, but it doesn’t mean that one person is the boss in that relationship.

When someone says, “I wear the pants in the relationship,” they’re usually joking, and if they’re not, I hope they are because that’s an out of balance relationship. Two people should be seen as equals and be able to have just as much say in decisions within the relationship.

My friend is an outgoing, assertive person, and her husband is very quiet and timid. She says that all the time, as a joke, but in actuality they both make decisions equally, she just has an easier time voicing her opinions publicly and being more assertive, but it evens out their relationship. When he doesn’t want to speak up about something, she will do it for him, and when she is too worked up about something, he calms her down and evens her out.

Screenwriter · Accepted Answer

It's like any relationship. Someone USUALLY takes the lead.
Maybe one wears the pants and the other wears the shorts... A 60-40.
Maybe one wears the pants and the other wears the kilt. A 50-50.
Maybe it's pants and skirts. 70-30.

There has to be some kind of split. It's not about male female. It's about HOW the relationship WORKs. It's like the split of labor: who's doing most of the manual, outdoor work vs. the indoor, livingspace work. Who manages the carpooling vs. the shopping.

You find out who LIKES being in charge and you see how that person being in charge works for the couple or family. Finances, driving, cooking, cleaning, PTA, doctor's appointments, taking care of the car.

coachTanthony · Answer

Every time my buddies and I would go out for some wings and a beer and our friend Jeff couldn't make it... we would all look at each other and say...

Guess she wears the pants in the house.

So it's a common talking point now in pubs all over the world lol

Jean-Marie_Céline · Answer

Good question, thank you for asking it.
I'd say this conception comes from the extremely polarized views on cultural and social issues that today's society has put on. There's no middle ground, no ''taking turns'' - many people feel that only a person in the relationship should be 100% in charge, all the time.
This kind of view is deletery and risks of ''petrifying'' the relationship in strict and unmoving roles that can give place to all sorts of problems in the long run.

jennifer_bloom · Answer

Both partners need to empower themselves because there is always the possibility that one person could lose their power to cease to be a candidate for romance (i. e. mental issues, addiction, divorce etc...)

MzAsh · Answer

We prefer when neither of us are wearing pants.

Pummel · Answer

That is a stupid saying (at least I always thought so), having said that have you ever heard of a "paradigm shift" ?
Women have the most important job on the planet, that is raising a human being to be kind hearted, intelligent, spiritual, responsible and respectful to all those who give respect.
I am a poor writer so please bare with me. Men were designed to be a provider, a protector, a father, a husband and a friend to his wife. He was to respect her opinion... no he was to value her opinion
The woman, which came from man (Genesis 2; 23-24) and Adam said , This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man.

Now even if you are not a believer one thing stands from this verse... A man has an X and Y chromosomes, while a woman has X and X chromosome, this means only a man can produce a woman.

Do you know who started the feminist movement of the late 60's early 70's, and why?

A= The Rockefeller's did. and here are the three reasons why (straight from the horses mouth and Gloria Steinem has said on many occasions that she personally received checks from the Rockefellers) here are the Satanic reasons:
(1) they had to find away to tax the other half of the world's population
(2) They wanted to break up the family unit (a house divided cannot stand)
(3) They had to find a way to get the children into school system at a much earlier age. Their scientists found out that imprinting is much more successful the younger the child (the Prussian education system is evil, it has ruined the United States and it has literally Dumbed us Down... See the book .. "THE DELIBERATE DUMBING OF AMERICA" by: Charlotte Thompson Iserbyt)

laffo1980 · Answer

No one should be dominant in a relationship. You want someone to walk beside in life not all over you. Women emasculating their men or guys letting women make the rules has really worked out well for us all lately with the rise of the domestic violence era and male suicide era. Then we have the family court parental alienation era because people can’t accept being dumped or expected them to just put up with their shit forever or refuse to accept that They actually weren’t the most important person to them on earth. Don’t try change people , work as a team , making each other happy , able to accept each other’s emotional neediness/crutch , have time for your own things /lives and most importantly show appreciation for each other’s gestures every time. Big or small Respect the effort. Don’t be a taker Accept that showing love or doing something nice is not on a ascending scale. Better and bigger doesn’t always big And that a treat is a treat not the new normal. Being ungrateful is how relationships become toxic. It’s a subtle slow burn in the background that pops up as resentment after the big fights (silent treatment, staying with the boys for a few nights , making big changes / decisions without the other input)

caring__1 · Answer

The most effective and enduring decisions are those made together. Unilateral decisions only imply the other person is irrelevant. If someone is superior, the other must be inferior. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life surrounded by inferior people? How could you grow? How could there be true value in whatever you do? Was it truly an accomplishment, or did you just need to convince yourself it was an accomplishment. I knew someone who felt the best conversations he had were with his clients (though he was a mortician).

Massageman · Answer

Yeah - much sexier with no pants. but I digress - - - - - - -

Each should be capable of wearing multiple pants,, er, uh, I mean, HATS! Years ago, I worked full time, worked on the house, and went to night school for an MBA. Now the tables are somewhat reversed: wife works the main job, I'm part-time, do most of the cooking, laundry and special projects. Wife does job and routine cleaning.

Your circumstances are likely to change at least a few times in your lives, and the successful couples are going to be the ones that master the changes, rather than letting the world master THEM!

Unit1 · Answer

What's wrong with wearing some pants? Do you expect the couples to go bottomless? I have a taste for fashion you know.

Lliam · Answer

Like one person is the boss and the other is his subordinate. Fuck that. Nobody is the "boss" in my relationship. We are equals.
I don't understand why anyone would think they are the boss, and I can't imagine why anyone would allow their partner to be the boss. That's no relationship at all.

Hayordrah · Answer

Nobody wears the pants in a healthy relationship. You share the responsibility, respect each other and give eachother "me" time. Nobody is the boss. If someone needs to be the boss, either one is controlling or the other is inconsiderate. There will always be things that one will take over more than the other, such as driving or certain chores, the more decisive one, more responsible one etc but it should be an agreed, mutual choice that both are happy with. Ying and yang.

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

I think some people have not really got out of the 6th Century

a lot of the shit they do centres around what things were like before society entered the dark ages, Middle Ages, Industrial Age and 21st century.

it’s a bit of a leap for some people and cultures to think this idea of no pants, no brains they manage,,,

Novacane · Answer

I would say it has to do with "Who is in control" considering that phrase dates way back when men wore pants and women would wear skirts. Therefore the one wearing the pants is a testament that they run the house how men were seen back in the days. If both of the partners wore the "Pants" then that just means that it is an equal household therefore the phrase of wearing the pants is not really needed or can't be applied. Wearing the pants signifies that there is an imbalance in power.

ecfresh · Answer

Because that’s how they were raised and many model it after their parents or other successful relationships. What they fail to realize is every relationship is different because every individual is different.

While the traditional 1950s answer was the man wears the pants the reality is these days both wear pants and actually it’s couples where neither person puts on pants that are likely to derail.

DrunkAss · Answer

I get accused of sexism here but it might be more due to our failings as guys. I have seen my share of submissive types of guys enter into relationships and they don't alleviate the burden and tension for their wives.

They don't cook and clean and become a super house husband. They become lazy and depressed. Their wives resemble their mothers at this point doing double the workload.

I think a man should step up to the plate here reasonably well as a result and "wear the pants" as they say because the usual dichotomy is not house husband vs. housewife. It's more often a lazy, pussy-whipped husband vs. miserable wife who resembles his mom

cheapshotbob · Answer

with my southern upbringing its the guy who does it bu tradition to a point
, you do have some younger kids that think it should be equal and you see them divorce quicker than the couplr where ne is in charge like he pays the bills for water, electric, etc, she pays for the food and other things but mainly its done equally but with the idea of the man paying for the more important bills. seeing how they can handle some thing better when it comes to arguing ver how much they should pay.

women just say CHARGE IT! lol

loves2learn · Answer

It’s a stupid saying. Relationships should be a give and take.

Smashingdoozy · Answer

I really don't understand this concept like a relationship is supposed to be equal? Nobody is in charge you just like to spend time together and genuinely enjoy eachothers company?

Anonymous · Answer

I never liked or was a fan of this either, I just never liked and always hated how the world or Society or reality says or dictates that it's the man's role to be the leader in the relationship, why should being the leader fall on one person's shoulders?

My guess is you don't think the guy has to or needs to be the leader in the relationship?

ArrowheadSW · Answer

Hummm... I wonder if it is just how some relationships work. I know a guy who has a lot of trouble staying focused on anything and everything. He has a girlfriend who almost runs his life. I asked him if he got the vaccine yet and he said that he can't because his girlfriend isn't on board with it yet, and he can only do what she allows! LOL... That is obviously overboard with her wearing the pants, but hey he'd be lost without her I'm serious! LOL

Citizenkirk · Answer

Gee, I don't know. It couldn't be do too mental defect and bad programming from childhood, since there are no documented cases of bizarre, bigoted, uninformed, biased, predjudiced, uneducated, inefficient, unexplained your unexplainable behavior, anywhere within the world throughout human history. It's not like we've actually had any conflicts, like maybe Wars, or riots, or anything like that ever---wait a minute we do we have those all the time!
Well there's your answer, some people think the way they do, """BECAUSE THEY ARE MORONS AND NINCOMPOOPS.
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BobawesFett · Answer

Yeah that's easy to summarize in one word. Fear. We could expand and go as far as fear and control issues but the control is basically a sub of fear. Fear breeds control control breeds anger and resentment. So when they have the power to overcome the fear they try to wear the pants as they would say

spartan55 · Answer

I don't agree with that mindset either. I had a couple of old girlfriends who thought they were in charge, thought they could tame Wild Swingin Spartan in his 20's...😂😂😂😂😂

Red_Arrow · Answer

Both people can wear the pants if they take turns. But only one can wear the pants at a time. Can you imagine both of you trying to get yourselves in a single pair of pants?

Tunasub · Answer

Relationships aren't about who is the boss.. what makes the relationship is 2 individuals working together towards the common goal of happiness for one another which culminates into happiness together.

lucas262 · Answer

The man. Lead. The woman submits.

When a man is incapable of taking the lead and that woman has to take on the role of the ,, man,, it's not good. Men should take the lead and LEAD. So many boys today don't know how to be men they just copy a bunch of nonsense they hear,

Most women iv heard have no problems submitting to a man who can lead and be that person in the relationship.

If a man can't do that then that man is going to be resented on some level and the ,, partnership,, is the way it is and its not good likely since most men are weaker today he'd let her take the lead which isn't what most women actually want.

Most women want a capable man. Honestly I don't blame women as much as weak men and society.

CrazyGirl2 · Answer

I don’t know really, troglodytes be troglodyting I guess?

KatherineJ · Answer

Since I never found a pair of pants that fit I willingly gave them up. My husband might “wear the pants”, but I control the zipper.

Cathy7734 · Answer

For me, I want the man to wear the pants and be the provider. I want to be taken care of. I don't respect women who wear pants because it's against nature. According to my bible study class, women are to take care and nurture the man.

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

A real man is always the head of the house but the sweet wife is the advisor...

Sometimes if the wife's decision is better than the man will take his wife's decision into consideration...

The wife follows her husband but that doesn't means that a man will never listen to his wife...

Leavesbound · Answer

I find it sexy when a woman wants to take charge in the bedroom. Especially if she's got good ideas.

DizzyDesii · Answer

We can share the pants but i’m still the main boss 🤣

have_a_good_day · Answer

Hey... Good point... *takes off pants* DOWN WITH PANTS 😠😠  #FreeTheWilly

RingOfFire · Answer

Tell you what. If she's hot, she can put her leg in one leg of my pants and I'll keep mine in the other.

Tyrael · Answer

So long as you're not paralyzed by indecision. As much as I admire the thought, I think one partner will always need to step up and make a decision. You're not always going to agree on everything, and it's kinda naive to think you will. It's a step in the right direction though.

little_rose · Answer

Why wear pants in a relationship? why even have clothes on?

JackSmy · Answer

Why can't both wear skirts? Does it have to be pants? Women are supposed to be the great negotiators, and Mothers, solving all the issues and arguments. More said, than the words here. . .

exitseven · Answer

Marriage is a partnership and nobody should wear the pants.

Likes2drive · Answer

No one is supposed to be the boss of the relationship, it’s a compromise and a give and take type of arrangement

PaynefulPleasures · Answer

Maybe this is why:

Floppy2112 · Answer

Because only one can. You cannot have 2 kings in a kingdom. Even in gay couples, there is a dominant and a submissive. You cannot have 2 dominents, it's like 2 black holes colliding, it causes a big bang.

snackthatsmilesback · Answer

Because there has to be a leader.

y'know it's not like there's multiple areas in a relationship that all need to be led, or like you could decide an objective way to settle stalemates that isn't one person having veto power, or like there are such things as co-leaders, etc.

It's weird being in charge of the whole relationship by default. I don't like that power dynamic either way I rather work together where we can.

devilish-cutie · Answer

For some men its so horrible to be ever controlled by their woman so they r rather controlled by their boys but no homo!

Gopackers02 · Answer

Wait 😂 ... someone in a relationship wears no pants?

DaveToo · Answer

I'd rather "F" what's IN the pants. Wear what you want. Some women like to wear pants so we wackos can't look up their skirts. Some wear pants to prove they are just as good at their job as men. Some women like to be feminine and wear dresses or skirt outfits. It's entirely up to you how you wish to present yourself to the world.

msbrightness · Answer

I agree entirely.
If the valuues and goals are not shared and common, you're in trouble.
Long term staying together depends much more on dealing with children's effect on sexuality - a hetero mom of course fancies a connection to her newborn son, as does a father to a daughter - the other parent starts to feel deprived or forced to share one person with someone they are meant to care for.
If you get that right - the house survives.
If not, it is dysfunctional, leads to divorce etc

Wiredone · Answer

Each person in a relationship should give 100% to the relationship. It's not 50%\ 50%.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

I guess that's the only thing they know. It's sad, though. People have such small imaginations.

krin_m · Answer

As a Dom, I like to be in control but I'm also respectful of my partner's independence. So I guess we both wear pands, metaphorically speaking! :-)

princeofromance · Answer

You need to share the responsibilities as a couple.

burlen · Answer

They grew up in a society that taught them only person should wear the pant in a relationship.

A_Bell · Answer

From a litteral level, I hate pants. From a figurative level, I like the guy be in control. Not abusive, just looking out for me. I like not having the responsibility and prefer to live in the moment.

Pete671 · Answer

Avoids arguments, I'd rather not have my own way than get involved in a conflict, happy to let my girl wear the pants so I don't have to make decisions,,,

Mark987 · Answer

I have friends that are married that the Women is the more vocal one or more dominant one... For sure it has to do with upbringing? and who is more vocal..

standardguy · Answer

Always somebody wears the pants. Either the man wears it or automatically the woman wears it. Women have power over the heart of their partner and if men have no instutional power within the marriage the woman decides all. It started with Eve in Garden Eden and it happens today in every non patriachical marriage.

live_life_out_loud · Answer

I agree but I also don’t mind letting the woman I date be the one to wear the pants (so to speak)

DocJones · Answer

I don't know that they think only one person should "wear the pants" in the relationship, I think people just usually pair up with someone that is more or less dominant than them.

I don't think it's common for two people with the same amount of pants wearing desire to enter into a relationship.

Craftsman · Answer

The reason one partner in the relationship wears the pants is the same reason there is one steering wheel in the car. Having one person in charge of a part or all of the relationship often makes the relationship work.

Open2It · Answer

I prefer not wearing any pants but that's just me... 😁

jshm2 · Answer

The same reason successful companies have one CEO and one Chairman. Someone needs to be the head, else you'll both go nowhere.

Why Do Some People Think Only One Partner Should "Wear The Pants" In The Relationship?

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Why Do Some People Think Only One Partner Should "Wear The Pants" In The Relationship?

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