Do you think that women have higher standards when choosing a significant other?

[Subarugirl]

[Anonymous]

Interestingly, no--and I don't think they can (as a group anyway) either. The reason is that for the most part, girls aren't doing the asking. That means they can only get guys as good as ask them out. The upside for them is that they don't have to deal with as much "in your face" rejection, but the downside is that eventually they have to accept the offer of a guy who asks them out or resign themselves to being alone.

For most guys on the other hand, you start with the girl you're most interested in and (very likely) get rejected, and keep working your way down your "wish list" until you end up with a girl who accepts you. But this is the best that guy could feasibly do since all his more preferred pics turned him down.

[ohshee]

I would like to think yes in most cases. But I also think relationships are changing it seems to me that friendships are getting stronger and relationships are being taken up just for convenience in a roundabout way. But for me I I've always looked at women as having a higher standard because in so many different ways when they are just a little bit deeper than guys they think way ahead you're always looking into the future where guys are looking glassy-eyed and at the moment

[Raphtaila]

I think having high standards is important I went threw phase where I needed and craved attention which caused me to make mistakes by sending things I shouldn’t have I learned from my mistakes but now I’m paying for it by having the past thrown in my face from time to time my boyfriend that I love so much of three months but we always get through it.
And my standards were real low before him and even if he throughs my past in my face we got through it together bc I believe there’s potential and if two fight and don’t give up might have a shot he hasn’t thrown my past in my face in a while maybe he’s getting over it finally

[NicoletteXO]

Yes, but they also hold themselves to higher standards too. A lot of men would be happy with a very mediocre relationship. Most women would not.

Obviously this is a generalized statement - there are some men with high standards, and some women with low standards. I'm just talking in general here.

[jennifer_bloom]

While woman are more likely to consider marriage and babies and lifelong companionship while men are more likely to consider a one night stand.

[SofiSin667]

Umm, some females (not all) are very demanding and have very little to offer. Guys on the other hand are more willing to work around certain things they wouldn’t usually prefer.

[Finchie40]

Nowadays yes, with the way social media labels people and brainwashes people to believe you have to be a certain way to be accepted , Most girl’s live on their phones and constantly compare there lives to others , Most girl’s are attracted to status , if he has a good job drives a nice car takes care of himself , dresses nice , and other’s look up to him etc, She will be attracted to that , so her list of preferences becomes a lot higher , Where a guy is just attracted to her beauty and her personality he doesn’t really care about her status what so ever , just as long as she is loyal and loving and makes he feel wanted and adored he will fall for her , But Girl’s nowadays have a list of things that he needs to get her interested , social media has played a big part of destroying how people label each other , sad world we live in

[RealMarek]

Dating apps prove that women are more selective than men. It is hard-wired into humans by evolution. The stone age was rough especially when population levels would reach what the land could sustain, and attaching herself to the most physically robust and smart man possible was a woman’s best bet for survival. When civilizations began to emerge, monogamy evolved as a way to reduce the level of violence that resulted from large numbers of single men (think of it as a prehistoric radical incel problem). The more monogamy is practiced, the more apt men are to find a mate. The rise of hook-up sites and the decrease in people who are monogamous is part of the reason why the percentage of men in their 20s who are not sexually active has skyrocketed during the past ten years.

[dowser19]

Women are all about one extreme or the other-no in between. On the one hand, you've got many who turn their nose up at any guy who isn't on the fast track to being rich and famous-and those types are everywhere now. So you'd think this is the case... but then you see a LOT of females, who, looks wise, you'd think would have high standards and COULD get those caliber of guys... but they're flooding your local Walmart as 19 yr old single baby mama's instead😳. So they're one far extreme or the other. Very rarely anything in between.

[Sarahr123]

No, not all. Some do. But it’s the same for men. Probably some men are easy for sex and some dumb ones will marry anything but both men and women settle for anything sometimes. Standards vary by individual and doesn’t seem to correlate much with sex/gender.

[Thatasianlove16]

I think we have to. For safety reasons and even financial. I don’t really care financially you just have to have a job. But I’m not gonna be with a man that can’t stick up for himself or me. I love sticking up for my man. But I have a life where I have an abusive step father and i like to think of you can’t stand up for me when and when that situation goes down you’re not right for me cause authorities have done nothing for us so it’s just been us women standing up to him

[t-8900]

yep you get it. Some girls find it strange when i ask if they'd defend my honor. I dont expect a girl to step in front but I do expect them to stand up and say something if I'm getting trashed. I'd take a bullet for my woman but can she at least stand up and snap back at someone who trashes me in a public setting? I told my girl I'll leave a guy in a hospital bed if he lays hands on her. Just standing up for me in return shows you value and love me and tbh it's a real turn on.

[Thatasianlove16]

@t-8900 exactly! I can’t be with someone that’ll take the pansy route when I’m being disrespected. Like you said I don’t want someone that’ll lay hands on someone everytime I’m spoken down to but have my back! Which is very rare nowadays or I’m just picking the wrong guys cause it’s either they pansy out or they get in fights constantly I need a healthy medium

[hahahmm]

Yes but it's way harder for most people to tell because a woman could be in a relationship that looks serious to outsiders and even to her clueless boyfriend but she doesn't take it seriously. I think this happens more often than the reverse case where he's playing her because she has way more checkboxes she needs to check before she really takes it seriously.

[meetkitty123]

I don't really know I have to be on here for so long I've read so much about what women want what men want interestingly it seems like we both want similar things but we ask for it or explain it differently. Or we simply maybe asking for the same things but her man certain areas might be more important and for women it may be less important.

[HighValue]

They have unrealistic standards because they sleep around and party and then have high standards when they want an SO. Then they get upset when a good man like me rejects them for their past. Many end up with a low quality mate because they have become low quality themselves by their past choices. Or they wait too long and pass 30 so most good men that want to create a family have no interest in them anymore.

[VanillaSalt]

I think men’s standards for picking a life partner are much higher and women don’t like it meanwhile women’s standards are higher when choosing who their willing to interact intimately with.


Basically women’s standards are higher in the first interaction and men’s are higher when making the decision of commitment.

[Novacane]

Of course, they do, but that's obviously due to biology since they are only able to mate with one person while men don't deal with that, so its only right for them to make sure they pick the right one, hence why they will have a list of expectations/standards which usually ends up taking out most men. Its a fact that women only find 20% of men attractive so they usually are all going for the same kind of guys

[Lionman95]

Yeah I think so though also guys have pretty high standards especially if they are looking for a long term relationship that isn't an open relationship.
I understand that it's necessary for women to do so because they have higher risks that to deal with.
At the same time it's the one thing I struggled most with when I had been looking for a relationship.

[Kaneki05]

Hmm if that was true a woman wouldn't be a girlfriend to guy who knowingly and did get eaten by a bear on purpose.
Nor would a woman date a man who cheated on them still.
Nor would a woman stay around when a guy hits her.

There is just people, some people have high standards and some have too little and some have just enough.

[Kaamraj]

Most definitely women have a higher standard of choosing a mate than men, because the cost of reproduction is much more for women than it is for men. Women's mate choice is a classical example of the pareto principle in economics where 90% of women are attracted to the same 10% of the man, or 90% of men are invisible to 90% of women, in short the average man is invisible to the average woman.

[Anonymous]

Women don’t have higher standarts. Women want love and sex. Men want just sex. If they want just sex, they don’t have any standarts and it is their problem. We know that many men who write us also writes and talks every women. So why should we talk with everyone. Besides, if any woman who has low standarts, they see them as a whore.

[ToastyOats]

Not at all. I have much higher standards, but Ia am also willing to settle for the good of my people. Most women I meet seem much more to be dating just for themselves, they do not veiw forming a family as a service they make to create a better world in the way I do and they certainly do not have any sense of urgency about it either.

[gag2021]

Yes, most women, especially if they are at least reasonably attractive. In the online dating sites, I have seen several single women post a long list of requirements they want, and say 'if you meet all those requirements', I MIGHT like you. Good luck with that.

[Subarugirl]

What’s wrong with that?

[gag2021]

That's your choice!

[Subarugirl]

What choice? Huh?

[DarkWinterNights]

@Subarugirl, In general, there is nothing wrong with high standards, but more often than not the profiles I see have requirements that are superficial and eliminate the overwhelming majority of solid guys that might be interested in her. Then they get upset and wonder where all the good guys are.

[gag2021]

Many women have requirements that are far above reality of what is in the real world. Like they're looking for a Superman.

[gag2021]

@DarkWinterNights Very good point! I agree. I don't think guys are as restrictive, or "paint themselves into a corner". I've seen profiles of women looking for a guy within 20 or 30 miles of where they live. It seems guys tend to be less restrictive.

[Guanfei]

After spending a lot of time on most dating apps, clearly women are much more demanding and much less ready to make any concession.
I'd say around 70% of the profile I've seen were basically like "I want all of this (followed by a list), I don't want that and if you don't like it you can leave"
It was just a grocery list.

Sure dating apps don't necessarily show exactly the same as what you'd find outside, but I doubt that it's really different.

[ODC2112]

No I don't think they have high standards. I think they have standards of pure fantasy.
These standards are often not oriented to the person, but to the social context of reference. Then of course they end up choosing the person they will divorce from.
Furthermore, most women think they are what they were at 23, that is, at the moment of maximum attractiveness, which is not the case in the years to come.