Would you ever be friends with benefits with an old ex?

Question

So I've decided to be friends with benefits with a recent ex turned best friend- both of us are okay with it. I'm curious to see who would do the same- after all, it's just sex and a friendship but I want to know what your feelings are

Diodoro · Accepted Answer

I would only because I know I could stay detached. But I'd be prepared for that not to last because of our history. The easiest way to have an effective long-term Friends with Benefits relationship is picking a person who has a character flaw that is so glaring that you will not be tempted to get into something more serious with them later on when you've had enough orgasms

That's hard to find with an ex because you wouldn't have gotten with them if they did have a flaw that was big enough for you to avoid that relationship. So you can pretty much guarantee at least one of you is going to start forming feelings again after a while

TruthBringer · Accepted Answer

No. Never have and don't have the intention of ever doing it. Once someone becomes my ex, they will remain an ex in the literal sense. No contact whatsoever. Once I'm done, I'm done. They won't get the slightest form of attention and I will "ghost" completely from their life as I've made sure they are the same in mine.

Besides, I'm currently in a loving relationship with someone better than both my exes. This is one more reason why I won't even partake in such activity. And if I happen to be single, I'll just spend my time finding someone who is worth it rather than wasting time with an ex.

alleon · Accepted Answer

I’ve done it. I don’t think I’d recommend. We split for a reason even though I still loved him actually he was the only one I was ever “In love” with. So to start sleeping with him wasn't a good idea for me personally because I was still attached. It took me years to ever fully get over that part of my life. So having a sexual relationship with him helped drag out those bad feelings.

CurlyGirl42 · Accepted Answer

Maybe, but you are confusing me with the question.. in the title you say an old ex, and in the text you are with a recent ex.. I would not do it with a recent ex, since there is a way higher risk of romantic feelings still lurking in the background and someone getting hurt.

ZackBan · Answer

You know a relationship is a friendship with sex involved.
So they are friends and decided to have casual sex basically means they are back together. They are literally one orgasm away from the good old "I don't wanna lose you again".
It's not a bad thing if they can work out their issues but they are deluding themselves if they think they can hookup like total strangers

hahahmm · Answer

No. 1. A lot of times people improve when they have time to reflect AFTER a relationship is totally over. You don't leave room for that when you're addicted to sex and spending your free time on that. 2. It can interfere with you getting a new relationship or giving your all to a new relationship. 3. You won't die if you don't have sex. I know it's hard for some to believe.

spookywashere · Answer

No, personally I believe it's important to stay faithful to one person. I saved my viginity for my boyfriend. Im not one to go messing around with other people just for the heck of it. Friendships do not require any sexual deeds and ex lovers are ex lovers for a reason so its best to keep them in the past.

molonski2 · Answer

Certainly NO , No way at all in this circumstance , will certainly get doubly complex , far better to have friends with benefits with a completely new individual , playing with fire , not a good choice.
But , no problem what so ever with the concept of friends with benefits.

humpbackjack · Answer

Yes I did it years ago and it was a much better relationship than our actual relationship as a matter of fact I went for about 4 years and only had friends with benefits and it worked out pretty good for me but it does take a certain type of person to be in that type of relationship several of the girls I messed with back then caught feelings and they tried making things complicated

pickedcrisps · Answer

No. Not for me. But I'm sure lots of people do or would. But oh well. I'm not missing out on anything. Thats why we play PC games and Xbox instead of friends with benefits. Haha.

Kroberts16 · Answer

More often than not feelings get in the way by one party or both. Unless both people are on the same page and no feelings are on the table, someone will get hurt.

ThatNoUVAtYourEyes · Answer

All 3 of my long term relationships left me with... urinary infection, then herpes that is still not entirely gone, then testicular torsion/some infection that was a truly bad experience, so on those grounds - no.
In principle I wouldn't be opposed, but women getting nasty on me again - no sex is worth that (and they seem to love resorting to it)

ObscuredBeyond · Answer

If she's proven herself untrustworthy with my heart, why would I ever trust her with my privates?  Anyone too emotionally immature for a steady relationship, shouldn't be having sex either.

GingerGuy · Answer

Depending on the ex yeah, it could even be a good thing (ie there might actually be some respect there - there's absolutely none with someone else usually). And communication will likely be better also.

Aurora1010 · Answer

That sounds like it could be a complicated situation in the future... I don't think it's such a good idea but it's your choice

LisaRaven · Answer

The only ex I would consider it with, if he was close enough to here to consider it, probably wouldn't be my ex anymore.

VanillaSalt · Answer

I’m doing it now. We split because we’re not compatible but hey a bj is a bj. There’s no feels and I told her regardless the sex we’re not getting back together.

Shizunk · Answer

I dont do casual sex with anyone. If I did sleep with people I don't love, no reason to exclude my ex. Probably would be easier to arrange than chasing strangers plus I already know the sex was good.

ronw235 · Answer

With one of my ex's hell yeah. 12 years after we split we became great friends, plus we already slept together so when we hook up forbthe first time it won't be awkward like a first time

fit_and_feminine · Answer

I only have one friend with benefits. We never dated but are very close.

t-8900 · Answer

I despise my exes for starters and i feel very connected to the person i'm with now. wouldn't trade her for anyone!

Mortdikeuu · Answer

Once you've been with an ex. The thought of love making with a con artist doesn't float my boat. I'd rather use a cordless drill on my temple instead

Nightroads · Answer

I've never slept with an ex after we broke up, closest i have gotten was an ex who requested one last round before making it official. I am not against it just does not appeal to me.

20yearsolder · Answer

Sure, there is no longer an emotional attachment, it's nothing but raw and unfiltered sex. Count me in

Would you ever be friends with benefits with an old ex?

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