A few factors maybe.
1. Not many decades ago, women had a very difficult time surviving without a husband. So they often had no alternative than to put up with abuse or cheating. That was true because of actual legal restraints on women, who didn't have the same rights as men.
2. Divorced people were socially stigmatized. Women in particular were considered used goods. But both men and women would be judged to an extent.
3. People remained married for the sake of the children.
4. People prior to the 1950s knew about hard times and worked hard, even when it came to living together and raising a family. They knew that life wasn't a cake walk and wasn't all about personal gratification. They also had the traditional values of their parents and earlier generations. They stuck things out. Society began to change a lot in the second half of the 20th century.
5. Religion. The Catholic church, for example, forbade marriage. When people pledged before God to "love, honor and cherish until death do you part", it meant exactly that. Marriage was for life. It was a solemn vow.
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No need to say anything @Lliam already nailed it with his answer💯
Men but mostly women are extremely damn spoiled that she can't just have one man, she wants her own private harem. That's why she cheats to the next guy over and over again until she gets what she wants. The only way a man or woman can find permanent true love, is to find someone who never experienced love or don't even know what love is or travel to a different dimension in fall in love with the male or female version of yourself. That's the only way you can actually be happy permanently.
Apparently in my opinion, people aren't loyal and committed to each other in no type of relationship that includes friendship. It also seemed people don't take marriage seriously enough if they got a file a divorce on each other. I think the wedding vows are supposed to be taken very very seriously before you kiss the bride. Meaning if you say to your lover in front of 50 or 100 or 1,000 or 100,000 this:
Pastor - "Will you have this woman/man to be your wife/husband, to live together in holy marriage? Will you love her/him, comfort her/him, honor, and keep her/him in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to her/him as long as you both shall live?"
"In the name of God, I, ______, take you, ______, to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. This is my solemn vow."
That means you're with that person for life no matter how terrible or how bad or how revolting or disgusting or any of that until you die and there's no going back. That's why my mother always tell me to think twice before you act, but when it comes to marriage you're supposed to think 7 times before you act. Feels ultimately retarded to take the biggest step in your life with someone and not stick to it until you die. Just because there's someone else that much more handsome than your husband or sexier than your wife that does not give that person the right to cheat. When you kiss the bride at a wedding, you're supposed to stay with her or him till you die then you can focus on cheating. The afterlife means: a period of continued or renewed use, existence, or popularity beyond what is normal, primary, or expected a TV show with a long afterlife in syndication. So once you die and start off in a new life then you can cheat was somebody else since you're going to probably be recreated as a brand new person in the next life. (I don't know if that's actually accurate, but saying it out loud is making me a immortality right now.) They say on Discovery+ has most recent data from the 2019 American Community Survey puts the rate at 14.9 divorces per 1,000 marriages, the lowest number since 1970. Divorce rate in 2000 to 2013: The divorce rate increased slightly between 2000 and 2013. In 2000, about 50 per 1,000 married men and women divorced, whereas in 2013, about 28 per 1,000 were divorced, widowed, or separated. 27.1%, 59.9 million people, had never married at the time.
The rate has went up lately from 2020 to 2021 and 2022.
Divorce rate in 2020: Divorce rate: 2.7 per 1,000 population (45 reporting States and D. C.)
Divorce rate in 2021: Divorce rate is 2.9 per 1,000. (24 reporting States and D. C.)
Divorce Rate in 2022: divorce rate is 1.2 per 1,000 (14 reporting States and D. C. We're only in the second month of this year so of course it would be small.)
it's all so aggravating to be with someone till you die but they're not satisfied. I know 10 top facts that causes relationships that's just so damn irritating like flesh eating virus type irritating. Those 10 facts are:
Infidelity or an extramarital affair
Trouble with finances
Lack of communication
Constant arguing
Weight gain
Unrealistic expectations
Lack of intimacy
Lack of equality
in a relationship, it's supposed to be equal to each other meaning 50/50, not 30/60 or 10/40 or 50/90. Oh God. Just thinking about this is making me so damn angry right now, because most of these facts are the reason why I'm single. Nobody including me should not be anyone's magical wish Genie and that includes magical money tree. I don't deserve to be cheated on divorced or broken up because I don't have certain things. But you get the jiff I'm sorry I can't talk about this anymore.97% in life don't live the life they want to live... Though they may be happy and content in their limited awareness of the world.
*Lack of the understanding and development of an attractive personality is the biggest reason.* One trait or characteristic is the ability to cooperate with others in a friendly, inclusive matter even when the others are very different. Most people, I have noticed, do not do that well. We have to turn being the bigger person into a habit and that doesn't just mean forgiving someone; it is way more complex than that. We also have to have a deep understanding on personality and how it affects everything around you. It is all very deep. I think it can be summed up in one phrase though. "Treat others the way you want to be treated" That sentence is priceless. Most people's actions, every single day, are asking for everything they don't want; and make no mistake you can ask for things with your actions.
"He/she was asking for it" If always fighting with your guy/girl? What are we asking for?
*I think we can say 100% that people get divorced because of 4 general reasons:* @ruth7 @lrina @apulu_3
1. They're not in harmony with one another and I don't just mean getting along...
2. They both aren't, individually, in harmony with their singular vision (so very complex)
3. They don't even have a singular, agreed upon vision as mentioned in #2
4. Lack of Self-Control/Discipline/Self-Accountability @Shiningtempest
4b: feel free to add something u think the first 4 don't cover
97% in life don't live the way they want to live... the only reason marriage isn't a failure 97% of the time is because "birds of a feather, flock together"
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You and your old best friend aren't best friends anymore because you grew out of harmony with each other... Why? You both have visions that weren't in harmony with each others; Or your bestie did something bad to you and you didn't let it go because you haven't develop your personality or don't fully understand the golden rule taught in preschool... Treat others how you wish to be treated. This is based on the idea that every action has an appropriate reaction. You don't treat everyone well because it is the right thing to do... *nor because Jesus said so. Why did he say so?* You treat your enemies well because at some point they will not be able to fight the unseen forces you keep shooting at them. They will slowly or quickly start to treat you the way you treat them depending on their use of their will power. Everyone reading this knows this is true when they look back at their life. If you are unaware of the power of golden rule or don't have the habit of treating enemies well then an angry person will get you to react in harmony with them. You turn angry or start to dislike them. You certainly don't treat them nice in that moment because you want to. What they are really doing is dominating the cells in your nervous system. It is all very deep but they have to perceive that you truly are treating them nice. The golden rule isn't just some cheesy saying. Like many old sayings, they have a lot of lost wisdom inside them. The wisdom in this case is Newton's 3rd law and the fact that it applies to EVERYTHING. The saying I mentioned about birds is also based on another law. These laws are why environment are so important. Marriage isn't rocket science but it is a science. It is more complex than what I explained; but those reason are the only reasons but in general form. Without harmony, vision, and self discipline, you will fail; and harmony is a very very complex word. It doesn't just mean getting along with others. Study Tom Brady and the one thing that everyone says about him.My wife divorced me
1. Men can't be men and women can't be women.
2. In true relationship you should not feel that you give, your partner must give you as much as you give your partner, and you mustn't look for what you give and what you receive.
3. No one told the new generations how to teart man or woman.
4. Money talks more than love.
5. They are selfish and wanna receive before they give.
6. The seek of high standards in both genders.
7. No one is trying to look for the problem and solve it.
8. The toxic environment of society and the sentence of "we don't need men/women in our world".
9. The leak of patience in relationships and the seek of quick results because of the quick rapid tempo of life.
10. The greedy selfs which wanna get money after divorce.
11. That nasty person who pretend solving problems and helping the partners while he is the devil who will ruin everything.
12. The lust of one of the partners which will make him/her a cheater.
13. The lack of communication between people while everyone is trying to survive and get money.In my experience it is just women who dont let themself abuse/disrespect anymore. My two divorced cousins were physically or mentally (?) abused by their ex husbands. However, the generation of my mum dont divorce as long as there is no physical abuse and financial problem although they get cheated on. I know so many women who got cheated on but they dont divorce since they are financially dependent on him and cheating is not a good reason to divorce in my culture (except the wife is the cheater). The men in my culture have one fucking job but they even can't do thst but fortunately women of my generation dont let themself disrespected anymore. However, arranged marriages is still very important and having boyfriend is seen bad. As a result marriages does not work very well since you dont even know your partner very well.
The reason why western women divorce may be the cheating husbands. According to statistics men cheat much more in their 30s aka when they are married. And the reason why western men may divorce is disrespectful wifes. I dont know much about the reasons but it is probably because too many people married due to societal pressure which is not a wise and mature choice and the same people divorce in their 40s-60s now. The newer generations marry wiser since there is no pressure to marry etc unlike 20-30s years ago in western world. As a result the divorce rate is very low among newer generationsHonestly I think its due to the people predisposition in the belief of traditional marriage. Man works and women stays home to raise children. I am not saying I do not believe in marriage. I mean the belief in the concept of what people believe marriage is suppose to be in a traditional sense versus the modern reality of the post Feminist Equality Movement.
Many people subscribe to this idea of tradition gender roles in a marriage... and even the young version of myself suffered from this misconception. Traditional gender role meant that women are to be respected, up held and supported by their men... but the women would still be submissive in some way to his ultimate authority on all matters.
At the same time lots of women want their men to up hold some of the principals that I will refer to as Chivalry. This traditional concept means that men would afford women all the traditional customary courteous and respect a man should afford to his lady... but in the modern world many women look and expect to be treated with some degree of chivalry but they do not want to give up any of their antimony or authority within the relationship. So the concept of Chivalry in a modern sense is dead, and power struggle begins.
So people get married with some believe in the concept that the other person will conform to some type of expected traditionally gender role. For example stay at home mothers that do not work, but still expect to have equal say in finical decisions, or husbands that work but then come home and over rule women in how they deal with the children. Traditionally speaking the home was the women's domain and men made all the finical decisions.
So here in lies the conflict, when women and men marry and determine that their traditional concepts or beliefs in how their partner should act within a marriage is challenged.Respect is a thing of the past. People's number one concern is themselves. People have lost touch with loyalty. #truth
That's a terrible combo written above. Those are things that probably won't come back at the same time in the future if they ever do at all. With that stuff not taught in every household, as the generations pass it will get harder and harder to recover. People are too worried about breeding these kids to be "woke" instead of teaching true morals and ethics. Why people can't recognize that will always boggle my mind. I think you should raise your kids to be nice and love one another but they also need to be taught that the world sucks sometimes and can be extremely unfair. People are mean and the majority will try and fuck you over somehow. If people would just be nice to others we wouldn't even be discussing everyone's pronouns. Because it wouldn't be an issue.
I just got a weee bit off topic. But my point is people will eventually stop getting married all together and I would think people will probably have 4-5 long term relationships as an adult. With loyalty and respect not being taught, no one will genuinely give a shit about their spouse.Divorce has been high since the late 1970's.
It's easy to point at social media and feminism, which is a modern issue that plays into the numbers.
The loss of community is perhaps the strongest reason. The invention of mass transportation from trains to cars.
The loss of morals. In decades before, a person feared losing their standing within their community. It could take years to establish in a community, and now no one hardly knows any of their neighbors.
The obsession with sex. Now it's no holds bar. Free and easy sex everywhere, and that is now widely accepted until your partner gets back out there, even while married. And this includes both men and women. More than 50 years ago, most women didn't talk about sex in public. Now 50 Shades of Gray is one of the most published books in history, and men are not really reading it.
The latest ways of social media and free sex are only enhancing this decline. Perhaps the most alarming is that at least half the married women out there have multiple partners, even while married and don't see it as cheating. Women get bored easy. And the hardest thing to believe is that this has been going on for decades and centuries before the decline of society.
In short, we as a species are no longer having to worry about our survival.I think there are a number or factors, but one is overlooked. It used to be that most people stayed nearby where they were raised and were able to make a living there. Extended family and community bonds were deep. In cities, people tended to stay in a neighborhood and had a religious community instead of moving around. People often knew who they were marrying very well, from the time they were young. The odds that a manipulative or “difficult” person could fool a local person during courtship were slim because, within the community, people were known quantities. If you didn’t know someone well, another person did and could give you a heads up if there were problems. Since WW2, careers increasingly demanded its employees to be mobile. Policies implemented in the late 60s made the cities dangerous, and masses fled to suburbs that were designed in a way that frustrated any sense of community. Beginning in the 80s, the idea of corporate loyalty was trashed, job insecurity began to increase. In the 90s the American industrial economy was intentionally trashed. The result was the depletion of the economy in much of the country with the enrichment of a small number of urban centers. All of these have led to a displaced population that lacks the community bonds. I believe this has frustrated the ability to form lasting relationships.
It is not so high where I live. Only about 1% marriages end in a divorce (considering only Hindu population because it is higher among Muslims). Probably people in western countries leave each other more easily instead of working out the differences or finding ways to tolerate. Divorce is seen as a way to set yourself free while in India it is seen as a failure in life.
Divorced men and women can easily find a new partner while over here people are afraid to start a relationship with such a person.
Also most people are each other's first or second partner in life so bonding is stronger. Many couples are virgins before marriage. It has been linked with significantly lower divorce rates.
I also think western countries are more openly sexual which leads to more infidelity and less self control. Life is all about finding someone you can have great sex with.
People in eastern cultures are also more emotional than westerners so most don't want to go through the painful process of a divorce.Everyone has there opinions. And only opinions about why the divorce rate is high. But the truth is… a) either you are being abused or cheated on and you want out. Or b) you to be free or find someone else. Those are the only two reasons. For whatever it’s worth, people are free to do what they want. I hear all this nonsense about the older generation knew how to work through the hard times and stick to there morals.. isn’t that the same generation that saw to women being unequal to men? The same generation that didn’t want to let women have voting rights? The same generation that believed that segregation was important and those of different skin color were inferior? Yeah, save me the “older generation had morals and values…” bullshit. It was all about appearance and comfort for them. Men had control and knew women couldn’t do anything about it. They could go and have an affair and not really worry about the repercussions of a woman speaking out against them. Women have power now, some may say too much.. I honestly thing women still will cherish a man that cherishes her (if you find that right woman with the right mentality). But yeah, to me the older generations should not be a gauge as to how to conduct yourself in this day and age.. rather learn from there mistakes of how they treated people (woman and different ethnicities) and understand that when you value someone the way they want to be valued sometimes, it’s a whole lot easier to keep a relationship.
Well, for a lot of reasons. The biggest one is stress caused by financial hardship. We're living in the worst economy since the great depression (arguably much worse). Everything is expensive and both people in the household are required to work. If you throw the financial strain of children into it, well, you end up with two very stressed out people who probably aren't going to be able to tolerate each other while the world around them burns.
On top of that, women have more options than they used to. It used to be if you were in a marriage that you weren't happy with, you sucked it up and learned to live with it because you didn't have a choice. Now you do. (Which is an improvement over the past, in my opinion.)
Finally, attitudes toward marriage have changed with the times. For a lot of people, marriage just isn't all that important anymore. It's something of an outdated (and to many, obsolete) tradition outside of receiving tax breaks for your mystical, magical, imaginary bond.There are many reasons for this, but I stand on hypergamy. Hypergamy is a social science term for the act or practice of a person who marries a spouse of a higher caste or social status than himself. As the helpful guy said, the world in the 1950s and the world today are not the same. In the 1950s, men and women were really looking for love, respect, and harmony, not hypergamy. Yes, there was money and status in the past, but there was not much difference compared to now. Currently, a woman agrees to be a rich man's mistress rather than marry the average man. No matter whether male or female, both genders don't want to do anything, they always want to destroy all
things. The first reason is technology. Technology has increased divorces. Thanks to technology, everyone has become accessible to each other. Life has become more difficult than before. Currently, if families want to make a living, the worker must work at least 8 hours, 40 hours a week. In this case, the spouses find it difficult to spare time for each other and they cheat on each other. For example, with the effect of technology, communication between couple wasn't developed, we encountered this frequently during the pandemic period, that is, they are in the same house, but they do not talk to each other. Secondly, everyone has such an expectation, as it is introduced as if living in luxury and living comfortably is a necessity, even a passion, with the influence of technology. When this expectation increases and is not met, this can be reflected in the court records as "severe incompatibility". Again, with the effect of technology, everyone expects this from their spouse, as if being beautiful and handsome is a necessity under all circumstances and at any age. When this is not met, they feel as if they are missing something, as if they did not catch something. This goes for both genders.In the state the world is in today, I would say partially because of quarantine. I would also say because of companionship. Many people get married just for the sake of not wanting to be/live/grow old alone.
Many also get married becaue of pressure, whether from the society that we live in. Pressure from our parents, friends, what we see on social media... many people get married just because of those reasons. These aren't all the reasons, but judging by the condition of the world, I would say so.From what I researched, it was not first time divorces, it was many people get married, divorced, married, divorced married, divorced, etc... last time I looked into it (its been a few years) first time marriages had a 60% success rate but all the repeat people that treat it like some sort of breakup and then get married again, keep increasing the divorce rate.
They changed it to show half of all marriages failed. My ex is on husband #4 last I had contact with her, 2016 or so, she could be on 5 or 6 by now.
I am going through my 2nd divorce, but I will never get married again. Not going to happen, I have it two tries and I'm done.Check out my opinion on this post:
Why Men Aren’t Committing To Relationships
And check out my question over here:
Are men BORN to cheat?
I hate repeating myself. But those two posts are my answer to thisBasically expectation is way too high , people aspire to a fantasy that simply doesn't exist " for ever " is for a fcking long time , monogamy simply doesn't work , the entire scenario is simply set to fail , unless your older and just think " Oh well " , the 50/50 figure is also a fantasy , as that simply includes the lazy who can't be fcked category ,
actual success would be under 20 % , look at females who remain in a marriage after being bashed " Ohh I made him angry " , the whole thing is a joke..
With failure as the destiny..because nowadays is more of an actual option
in the past, people would stay together even if they ruined their lives in the process... they would much rather pretend and stay together so people don't talk about it
and nowadays there's more "freedom" on that aspect... if two people are just not happy, they split and divorce, instead of punishing one anotherIt’s a number of things.
The cost of living is too high which negates gender roles and puts strain on couples. It’s so hard to save money for a down payment on a house. Most people rent.
Also social media and dating sites people are afraid to commit because we’re so used to instant gratification and the thought of “I can find better easily” has decreased the chance of actually settling down.
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