Women get blamed for everything if we are sexually harassed it's because we're "playing games" or "teasing them" if a woman gets raped, then it's because she was dressing provocatively or she was "at the wrong place at the wrong time" if we get cheated on it's because we nag too much or we pushed him to do it or we "let ourselves go" it's like men are the only group of men whose behavior are always justified and ignored and are never held to any sort of accountability while we as women are constantly blamed for everything especially when we are being the woman that they claim to want.
Men: "if you want to keep your man then you need to cook, clean and maintain your looks EVERYDAY, be faithful and be EXTRA good in bed and submissive"
Women: *does exactly what is being asked of men*
Men: *still sleeping with ex's, co-workers and friends with benefits and still get told that men aren't obligated to monogamy and to accept it *
If we're looking for love, then we're lonely. If we're looking for sex only with no strings attached, then we're sluts. And if we want marriage, kids and monogamy, then we're desperate.
If we give it up too soon then we're "easy" and get ghosted. But if we make him wait for it, then we're dick teasing and playing games.
But I never hear these talking points the other way around regarding men whenever men or poorly mistreated by women then it's always excused. What is it with the double standards?
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If you don't like what you see in a particular person, don't continue to see that person, but never project blame for the actions of an individual on an entire population. Laying blame never moves us forward or resolves anything. It just fuels our internal fire of anger and has no impact on those we're blaming.
I agree that most people are too self-centered to be healthy partners, but that doesn't mean all people are unhealthy partners. Learn to read the signs and make sure everything is on the table before investing. Unfortunately, people assume you are rushing a relationship if you seek an understanding of them early on, so most people just see what they want to see or what they fear seeing and skip the exploration and discovery phase.
If fault is to be laid, let's look at our own choices, words, actions, cause/effect and responsibilities, for that is all we have any control over. Laying blame on external factors or others is a waste of time and energy, and it prevents us from learning from the experience, so we don't continue repeating our same dysfunctional patterns. Just because we're drawn to a particular type doesn't mean that type is a healthy match for us. Learn what works rather than focus on what you believe should be. Accept people as they choose to be, not for the potential you believe they could be. That doesn't mean you need to associate with them, but people aren't lumps of clay to be molded by others.