Do you think I'm wrong for being disappointed that my boyfriend doesn't support me in this difficult situation?

[Anonymous]

I learnt about my pregnancy a few days ago. I leave alone and i have no one in this city. No family members, no close friends not even my boyfriend. I'm completely alone and i really wish i was able to have someone to go for a walk or a coffee. Someone i could talk to so i can get my mind of this stressful situation. We decided we're not going to keep this baby. That's something that makes me really sad and i can't stop thinking about anything else these days. I'm trying to remain calm when I'm talking with my parents or my boyfriend cause I don't wanna make them worried about me. But there is something that made me feel worse. I learnt about my pregnancy this week and my doctor told me we don't have much time so if i actually decide that I'm 100% sure about this situation we have to do it this week probably around Tuesday. My boyfriend had to be on wedding this weekend in a city 6 hours away. He's not someone really close to him. Just an old friend that he hadn't even mentioned the last 3 years i know him. You learn about your girlfriend's pregnancy, you know she's is alone, sad, young, has to make such an important decision and at the same time her exams for her university start this week. You have your weekend free and the only thing you have to do is to drive for 3 hours to get to her. Do you really choose to go that wedding? Is this really more important? On top of that he didn't made it clear he's going to be there on that really difficult day. He said something " we will see if i will be able to make it". Also he asked me to not tell my parents about my pregnancy. Of course i did, i can't go through this completely alone without sharing it with anyone. I get that he is working during the week but it's a fucking family business so I don't think it's that hard to explain that he has to leave for a fucking day. I'm just disappointed cause he's not young, he's 30 years old he should be able to understand.

Updates

1 y

You know what's even worse? He didn't even went to the wedding. I just called him and his friend picked up the phone and told me that they didn't went to the wedding and that they just gonna go to the after party!

[Anonymous]

A difficult position you're in indeed and you describe it well.
Sounds like he's running scared but at his age he should be capable of more. Unfortunately, perhaps he just doesn't want to and would rather avoid the situation.

[Asker]

I don't understand how you can be 3 years with a girl that you claim that you love and stuff like that, and at the same time being completely okay with leaving her alone through something so difficult during a period that she has to deal with other things and all that while she just turned 21 years old. Obviously i didn't create this situation on my own, why I'm the only one that has to suffer emotionally and physically while he continues with his life?

[Shamalien]

He should be there for you…but you need to let him know how much it means and that you want him there. Seriously, men are not so quick with these things

[Asker]

"Men are not quick with these things". I understand that but it's not that he didn't imagined that i didn't like the way he talk to me during a disagreement, or that i was expecting something for my birthday, or that i want him to spend more time with me instead of playing video games and stupid stuff like that. It's something really important and i personally think that if i have to ask for your support and you being around, it indicates that something it's really wrong. I don't feel physically well, my body hurts, I'm dizzy, i vomit pretty much everyday and I'm always tired. I feel depressed and i really have difficulty eating. I'm confused , scared and feeling guilty for considering that as an option cause a part of me already feels connected with this baby. A have a couple of days to decide and on top of that i have to study for exams that start tomorrow. Couldn't it be more obvious that i need someone here?
Also if you ask me to keep it a secret and not share it with my family (which of course i didn't) , at least you have to be here.

[Shamalien]

Yes it is pretty obvious but like I said, men are slow with these things sometimes, he’s very preoccupied where he is and probs needs a kick in the bum

[LazerBean]

That sounds pretty expectable from a man who wants his child dead and tells his baby momma not to tell her parents about the pregnancy.

[Asker]

He asked to not share it with my parents because they are going to judge him and affect our relationship. Like isn't that really selfish? So i have to not share it with anyone but at the same time he's not even here for me... Of course i told my parents and my father asked me if i need him here before i even managed to finish my sentence. That is going to create problems in his work, he would have to drive for 8 hours and spend money that he doesn't have. But he didn't had to think twice about it and he's not even responsible for what happened.

[BarryLiverstone]

Sounds like a challenging time in your life. Is he taking care of you?

[Asker]

If just sending money for the doctor counts, i guess he does.😂 Oh he also calls me few times during the day. Personally i think that's the bare minimum.

[Guy13]

Have the baby... give it up for adoption.

[Asker]

If i have the baby I won't be able to give it for adoption

[AssholeNumberOne]

He's immature. He should be w/ u

[Asker]

I know and i can't think of any excuse. I told my father yesterday and he asked me immediately if i want him to come here. He would probably argue with his boss, drive for 8 hours and spend money he doesn't have. My boyfriend works in a family business with his brother and he comes here all the time for work and stuff like that but he can't be here for something that's so important? I'm not the only one responsible for this situation, why i have to go through this completely alone?

[exitseven]

This guy is a POS.

[Asker]

I wasn't expecting that but yes I'm really disappointed.

[exitseven]

I apologize for my blunt comment but truthfully I was taking it easy on this guy.

[Asker]

I meant that i wasn't expecting him to act that way but i guess that hard times will always reveal who actually cares.

[exitseven]

sorry about the whole thing.