I met a guy last year on a dating app who seemed just wonderful. He had just immigrated to my country from abroad to start a new life. When we first met, he was unemployed after just moving here but a few weeks later he got a job in a factory. He wasn’t so happy with this, he wanted to be an actor.
he was quite broke but I didn’t mind as he was so nice. on the other hand, I’m a very successful women, progressing in my career, my own car, house and financially secure.
We just clicked and had an amazing connection, loads of laughs and he seemed caring and kind. It was crazy how much we had in common and the early days were just amazing times together. I think because he had just moved here, he didn’t know where to plan dates so I planned everything
but me planning everything continued but I did so as he was supportive and seemed super into me. He showed me off to all his friends, he texted me non stop. He was gentle and sensitive and in touch with his emotions.
but 3 months in, he still never did anything to plan dates, it was all me. I always helped him with his life admin, supporting him to find a new job, but he kept getting rejected so he sorta gave up.
i do t know if it was because his initial excitement of being in a new country wore out, but he completely changed and seemed depressed. He was critical, super low effort, giving me evil looks when I did the slightest thing wrong. He didn’t want to talk about any of my concerns. He kept going on about how he hated children and wants a child free life in future when he told me when we met that he fought with his ex as he wanted a baby and she didn’t. Sometimes he would cry about how hard his life is when I tried to talk about our future goals for our relationship.
I felt so anxious and disappointed. And he left me and said he dated me as he was lonely and never fell in love. He said the kids thing is the main dealbreaker for him but I don’t know if he was lying. Now he’s back on the dating apps
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1Opinion
No such thing
I just can’t get over him. I’ve not even had a kiss in a year since we broke up. I don’t think I can trust a man again.
When I met him, it all felt so perfect. We had so many strange links and coincidences that made it feel like things were meant to be. He even said that.
Coukd me being successful and him being broke have lost him to lose attraction? It’s weird as the girl he is dating now looks like a more plain Jane version of me
You need to stop watching him and focus on yourself
Does it sound like he has an avoidant attachment style?
It sounds like you need so assistance with moving on from this
Am I broken. I fear I will never have a connection like it again. The early days and first dates were just so romantic like in a movie. I was so happy. I feel so stupid for doing so much for him
That's a fallacy. You absolutely can have a connection like that; even better than that.
I don't know why you'd feel stupid for learning lessons; that's essentially what dating is all about. Learn the lessons you need to so when the right guy comes along, you're ready