We’ve been going out for about a year. At the beginning of the relationship she would apologize a lot when she would complain about something because her ex and friends would get frustrated with her when she did. I told her that she doesn’t need to apologize and that she can complain to me about anything, thinking her friends were just jerks.
I began to realize that she has near constant drama of some kind from a million different sources and it results in her being negative almost constantly and it’s bringing me down with her. She has severe body image issues and anxiety, her doctors have no bed side manner and my girlfriend will come from the doctor crying because they would tell her harsh truths. She ended up getting a ton of kidney stones. In the year that We have been going out, she’s been nearly constantly sick with kidney stones. This last one has resulted in multiple ER visits and multiple surgeries.
There is constant drama with her friends and family too. Her mom is very controlling and her entire family is also unhealthy and have almost constant medical emergencies. And her friends lash out if they feel like they aren’t being prioritized by her.
We went on a weekend trip and we were walking around and out of no where her back started hurting so bad we had to leave and she was bed ridden for a week.
She has had multiple anxiety attacks with me. I can’t think of a date night we’ve had where there wasn’t some sort of drama.
These issues are constant enough that I don’t feel comfortable giving any sort of feedback for fear that I would be piling on and making it worse. I need to tell her that all of these issues are putting a ton of stress on the relationship. I have lost almost all my empathy, which is horrible considering she obviously doesn’t want this. But I can’t take it, I am not happy in my own life outside of the relationship and this is just dragging me down further. But I am her only support, and I am terrified what might happen if I leave?
I began to realize that she has near constant drama of some kind from a million different sources and it results in her being negative almost constantly and it’s bringing me down with her. She has severe body image issues and anxiety, her doctors have no bed side manner and my girlfriend will come from the doctor crying because they would tell her harsh truths. She ended up getting a ton of kidney stones. In the year that We have been going out, she’s been nearly constantly sick with kidney stones. This last one has resulted in multiple ER visits and multiple surgeries.
There is constant drama with her friends and family too. Her mom is very controlling and her entire family is also unhealthy and have almost constant medical emergencies. And her friends lash out if they feel like they aren’t being prioritized by her.
We went on a weekend trip and we were walking around and out of no where her back started hurting so bad we had to leave and she was bed ridden for a week.
She has had multiple anxiety attacks with me. I can’t think of a date night we’ve had where there wasn’t some sort of drama.
These issues are constant enough that I don’t feel comfortable giving any sort of feedback for fear that I would be piling on and making it worse. I need to tell her that all of these issues are putting a ton of stress on the relationship. I have lost almost all my empathy, which is horrible considering she obviously doesn’t want this. But I can’t take it, I am not happy in my own life outside of the relationship and this is just dragging me down further. But I am her only support, and I am terrified what might happen if I leave?
Updates
1 y
I feel like I can’t tell her she needs to work on herself, because everyone else in her life tells her that and she doesn’t react well to it. And she comes to me specifically code comfort and to be the shoulder to cry on. And I truly do want to be supportive, I just didn’t realize that being supportive would take over the entire relationship..
