Are lap dances at strip clubs considered cheating?

Question

20yearsolder · Accepted Answer

It's totally up to each couple to decide whether that's cheating or not. I've been to a strip club, more than once. I've also had a lap dance more than once. Something everyone needs to understand, 99% of these places are no touch. If you even attempt to touch one of the ladies you will be escorted out of the club. The lap dances that I received I did not pay for. I was at a bachelor party, someone paid for me to go have a lap dance. Did I enjoy the view, you can bet your ass I did. Did I lust after them? No I did not. I understand that there working, that's how they earn a living. A lot of these women are single parents, raising a child and making a damn good income. Now if your boyfriend or husband comes home with a raging boner because he's been at the strip club then you have issues with him. The good sign is he came home with the raging boner because he didn't bust another at the club. I don't know if a lot of you consider this cheating because of your insecurities? There are a lot of these women that don't look as good as the ladies that are worried about their men going to the club. Just my opinion, not trying to start a fight. I have no issues with whether you consider it cheating or not. My wife does not consider it cheating. Basically nothing happened besides there was a naked woman standing in front of me shaking her ass.

molonski2 · Accepted Answer

I know many are going to say " No " its not , but after having a number of years previously within the industry , and having seen what I have seen and even participated in I can assure you it certainly is cheating in a true sense.

People say things like " we go as a couple " and blah , blah , blah , believe me , the dance for the " couple " is vastly different , just as it often is ( the other way around ) for a guy with a particular connection.

It also depends on the club , there was another club ( not sure if its still there ) Richmond , Victoria Australia ( no liquor license ) different restrictions , which was basically a whore house.

But , I can tell , there would not be a partner on the planet ( unless genuinely open and getting a serve from someone else ) who would be happy with what happens at times. There are also different rules in reality around timing , a busy Saturday night / Friday night , with a couple of bucks nights in - meek and mild , compared to what happens on a quiet Wednesday afternoon , with someone who has an actual understanding of how things work.

Let your imagination run rife , then x it by 5 , it may not always happen on premises , but there is lots that happens in this world , it attracts those kind of people also , all sorts.

Jennyjenjen_420 · Accepted Answer

Some might say just going to the strip club is cheating. Looking is fine as long as there is no touching and that includes the female touching the man, definitely vice versa. For me, I’d want to go to the strip club WITH my man 😜 but then again I may not like what I see. If you are in a serious, committed, monogamous relationship, it’s just best NOT to go to the strip club at all. Would you mind your woman going to a Chip ‘n’ dales? As long as I am able to go to a Chip ‘n’ dales then I’m all for it. All in all though, what it really comes down to is trust. Would I be able to trust that my man would be able to control himself? Every woman (at least almost every woman) knows that with the right price and the right stripper there is a VIP area and touching is allowed with some sexual activity too. So that depends. Again, it’s best to just avoid a strip club unless you want a messy relationship or don’t care about the relationship.

Paris13 · Accepted Answer

Anything SEXUAL without the Partner's Consent----Hell YES!!! xx

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Forget the word "cheating" because it invites disingenuous word games revolving around whether something is "technically" cheating.

The gist of the offense with cheating is that you have either made a promise, or your partner has a reason to expect you, to conduct yourself in a particular manner and to totally abstain from doing certain things. When someone is cheating, there is almost always and effot to conceal the behavior because the person knows that their spouse would disapprove/file for divorce/just pull out a gun and shoot them. The secrecy is motivated by the knowledge that the person knows they are violating their partner's trust or expectations.

So, my usual response is. . . is this something that you would do if your partner was present? If not, why not? And if it must be done in secret, how is that better than doing it openly in the presence of your partner?

ohsheeT · Answer

I really don't think that it's cheating but it's the same time it's something you have to ask yourself or tell yourself if you're going to do this then that means it's okay for your significant other to go do this too even though it might be innocent you're saying it's okay for your significant other to do it if you do it

There are many different things in this world that some people consider treating some people don't but what you really have to look at is if I do this then I'm saying that it's okay for my spouse to do it too it's probably just a good thing not to go do LOL that way there's no problems not unless she's with you and that would be a better situation because I would get her a lap dance issues with me because I want her to experience it

Apple1996 · Answer

A lap dance yess but just being at a strip club with friends or for a party no. Luckily my partner is disgusted by strippers cuz his sister was a stripper for years so he refuses to go unless I'm with him

dynamicyandere · Answer

Cheating is an ambiguous term.

Doing nothing at all with other people is definitely not cheating.

Having sex with someone who is not your significant other (assuming you are monogamous and exclusive) IS cheating.

Everything else in between?

Grey area.

That sh*t needs to ALL be sorted out and made clear through proper communication.

Aerissa_Jade · Answer

Ask your partner to find out, if they don't want you to or approve of it, then yeah... if they are like go for it, then nope.

BlueScorpio · Answer

If you're married then yes. That sort thing she be recieved/done by your spouse only.

AviatorTom · Answer

Not unless it develops into something more.

Anonymous · Answer

SHORT ANSWER (Too Long Didn’t Read “Detailed Explanation” further below):

If your “SO” (Significant Other) thinks that you getting lap dances at strip clubs is considered “cheating” then it’s cheating.

DETAILED EXPLANATION:

There is NOT an “absolute” definition for what “cheating” is — cheating is different for each different couple. 

Some couples consider physical acts such as kissing or intimate touching/cuddling people outside of their relationship to be “cheating”; and other couples consider in-person flirting with anyone outside of the couple’s relationship to be “cheating”; and other couples consider any online flirting (such as sexual chatting/sexting/roleplaying/sending & requesting nudes) with anyone outside of the couple’s relationship to be “cheating.

And some couples think some or all of the above is ok; and an even smaller subset of couples have partially open or fully open relationships w their SOs, where manual/oral sex or full sex with non-SO people is ok/allowed. 

So, what “cheating” is DEPENDS on what each couple allows/does not allow to be done with others outside of the couple’s relationship. 

BOTTOM LINE “IN GENERAL” COMMENTS:

Doing ANYTHING with someone outside of a couple’s relationship that is “not ok/not allowed” under that couple’s “relationship agreement/understanding” is “cheating” for that couple.

Finchie40 · Answer

Yes if your partner finds it disrespectful, How would you feel if she was getting a lap dance by a male stripper without you knowing and then you find out later this male stripper had his cock in her face? So unless you don’t have your partners consent it is cheating , For a relationship and for love to grow , you should always make your partner your number 1 priority , always put yourself in their shoes before making decisions , if you aren’t ok with them doing something then it’s not ok for you. Selfishness is a relationship killer , If you can’t remove selfishness for your partner they will not be able to remove it for you. And you are probably best not to be in a relationship period , Respect each other and value each other , We can’t force someone to love us and stand by us but we can treat them the same way we want to be treated , if they choose to walk away , let them go , Because you can’t respect someone that doesn’t respect you , If someone tells you that you are being insecure and controlling they are selfish because it has nothing to do with that , it comes down to respect for each other. From my experiences with girl’s most girl’s are very selfish people that only really care about themselves , most girl’s want a man to love and adore them , and when they find that man they start pushing him away and playing games with him , , Why is guys need to play good guy bad guy when it comes to relationships or she will lose interest , Girl’s need drama in their lives , Find a girl that will remove her selfishness for you the same you do for her

ShadezMcgee · Answer

Guess that depends on the boundaries established in the relationship of the couple.

Although some strippers that I knew back in the day are pretty territorial when it comes to regulars and act as though they were cheated one when another dancer gives them a dance.

Crazy.

Middleman · Answer

I believe it is (borderline) especially if your spouse doesn't know that you go to one. Cheating in my books is defined as (mostly) physical sexual interaction with the other member of sex including having a relationship with them (other than your spouse). Modern table dancing has certainly turned things on their heads, in particular for those who have religious views, because it is a rather grey area.

Personally speaking I think relationships that are wholesome doesn't need any form of lapdancing to keep it going. Why would any sane person want to spend time with and be with someone other than their spouse?

PeteBy · Answer

Only been to a strip club once and genuinely didn't know it was one when I went in as my 'friend' paid the entrance fee. A woman came over to me at the bar and asked for my belt. I found out later why. Is it cheating? Well I felt uncomfortable being there, not for me but her.

I didn't like watching her strip. I don't appreciate men ogling a woman like fresh meat. I only stayed as she had my belt, I do get it's their choice (and sometimes it isn't) but it just didn't sit right.

When she came to me with my belt, still topless I looked away and apologised profusely and explained I didn't know it was a strip bar. She said she noticed I wasn't looking and still wasn't looking as she stood there topless. She said 'Thank you, that means a lot to me' smiled and walked away.

Don't get me wrong. I have done some pretty out there things sexually in my time but paying to look at a naked woman dance and be ogled by hundreds of men, just felt wrong.

Kaneki05 · Answer

Cheating is something you cannot tell your partner about because you know they would feel betrayed.
If you can tell your partner this because you know they wouldn't mind then it's not cheating.
So whether it's cheating or not depends highly on your partner.
Personally I don't see why one would in relationship unless if it's just a one time thing because you've never experienced it before. Or you and your partner both go together lol.

hIopinionated_ · Answer

100%. If my boyfriend wants to go to a strip club or get lap dances, he can do that single. It would be over as soon as I find out or get an indication what type of guy he is. He can find another woman who doesn’t mind the disrespect though; however, it will never be me

dustybiker · Answer

From a woman doing a job at a bachelor party or something, they are more likely to come home to you revved up. You’ll be the one enjoying the night. Trust is a powerful thing.

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

Are lap dances at strip clubs considered cheating?
The Girls Are Going To Say YES & The Guys Are Going To Say NO.

If a stripper is in a relationship & works at a strip club is that cheating?
NO the stripper is just doing their job.

If a girl goes to a gynecologist & she is in a relationship & the doctor is male & examined her taco is that cheating? NO

If a guy is in a relationship & goes to a doctor for a physical & the doctor is female & grabs his balls & tells him to cough is that cheating? NO

sabotage22 · Answer

I think it is open for discussion with your partner. I wouldn’t consider it cheating as it is a paid thing in a strip club. I have been to some with friends even if I was in a relationship. But my girlfriend always knew I would be going. If she told me she was uncomfortable with that, I would respect it and would not go.
I would find it problematic if I would go there regularly. That might point to some problems in our relationship, which this could be a way of coping with. But I can find better ways to spend my money, than for a girl stripping in front of me.

NathanDavis · Answer

personally... I would not care if a girlfriend gets a lap dance, because it is just a lap dance

but to me, it is more than that... this should be a conversation between partners, and you should know ahead... if he or she, is not happy and does not like the idea of the partner getting a lap dance, then the partner should just not do it, as simple as that...

everyone is different and has different approaches to this stuff

personally again... the only lap dances I got, they were from my girlfriends lol, so I don't think that was cheating...

Cats-and-video-games · Answer

This is a very debatable question and I think its heavily context based, first of all there's partners who'd simply dump your ass immediately if you set foot in a stripclub without them regardless of the reason (Even if someone pushed in there and you left immediately lmao) From what I know about stripclubs both people involved in a lapdance are not allowed to directly touch each others genitals or make-out but i've had a lap-dance once and she rubbed her hand right up against my tent (I would consider this cheating/final warning from my spouse)

I dont think many spouses would approve of it however unless you happen to be in a very open and loose relationship

Autember · Answer

If your partner is uncomfortable with the idea then yes it is cheating. I think consent in relationships determines what is okay and what isn't okay. I wouldn't want my partner going to a strip club, period. That's MY boundary.

DCooper · Answer

Not as long as you keep your dick out of the stripper. I don't know where all this stuff about no touch comes from... all the strip clubs I've been to, the girls will grab your hands and run them all over themselves if you aren't doing so already, lol.

Marniboo · Answer

Physically no I don't think so.. but it will destroy your partners confidence ! She will feel as though she's not enough for you or that she's not pleasing to the eye anymore or pleasing you in the bedroom or not sexy enough.. that's just common sense really if your not stupid ! It's selfish !!

Smoke-n-Growls · Answer

Depends on your relationship.

Some people wouldn't consider it cheating, others may. You gotta talk about this sorta thing with your partner to figure out what is considered cheating.

Some insecure men think texting a guy is cheating, even if that guy is a blood relative (not dating, ofc). Some insecure women think liking a social media post is cheating.

It all depends. Communication and trust are key.

ShaTTeredMasterpeace · Answer

So I feel like it depends. Because some people are ok with it and some are not. That's where communication comes in. I mean I'm cool with going to the strip club together. Hell we can both get lapdances lol. My person would also probably never be interested in going to a strip club when they know they have their own personal stripper at home 🤷🏾‍♀️

JessJJ · Answer

No, it would be unfair and petty to class anything with a stripper as cheating in my opinion.

Shamalien · Answer

Personally I don’t see it as cheating, but if I imagine my partner going to a male strip club and getting a lap dance, it would take a lot of trust for me to not worry they went farther.

tbh if I love the girl I’ve no interest in it, but I will say that when I have gone, it was just to have some drinks with my boys and shoot the shit while having background entertainment. I got a lappy as a right of passage when I turned 19 and it was fun but I was also single and have never shelled out for one since. I’m just so me, I tried to talk the stripper into respecting herself 😂😂😂

katiesmuff · Answer

If they are; so many men are in deep shit! If my husband went to a strip club and received a lap dance I would be alright with that. I might have different thoughts if he just went to a strip club and purchased a lap dance when he knows that he gets it for free at home.

sheikalana · Answer

The fact that a married man goes to strip club is already weird to me not to talk about a lap dance.

Vixen835 · Answer

From experience, guys don't always go into strip clubs to get a one on one dance from a girl. They can get their kicks from just sitting, drinking and watching half naked girls walking about trying to tempt guys into private booths. However, in my opinion, your man would only be going into these places to take the fantasy home, to maybe imagine the sexy girls whilst having sex with his partner. That to me is horrible. If your partner is keeping you happy enough, you shouldn't have the desire to go to a strip club. If you can't communicate with your partner that you are not satisfied, then deal with it, not snoop behind their back. Unless you're happy with your wife/girlfriend going to male strip clubs to get her fill. Put the shoe on the other foot

Anonymous · Answer

If he's my man, hell yes! Having another woman strip for him or give him a lap dance is completely out of the question. If he wants a lap dance he needs to come to me, not some other woman (and I'm totally willing to giving him one).

lightbulb27 · Answer

depends on the relationship and agreement. in general no, but it could cause problems in the relationship just like cheating.

I have never had interest in being teased by some woman that doesn't care about me in effort to manipulate me to make money. That's like the ultimate offense isn't it..."you aren't worth it to me, so give me money". Very lame. makes no sense to me. but if that's where the guy is emotionally, and his wife/girlfriend is ok with it, then whatever.

PositiveNote · Answer

Cheating has to be defined by the person who would holler "Cheater!"

Seriously, to some people it would be cheating, a sin, or a waste of hard-earned money. However, if there is no one claiming it's cheating, it's recreational activity.

HelperDude · Answer

Going to the strip club without your partner’s knowledge is cheating to some level. It isn’t like sex with someone or going out on a date with somebody else but it is on the chart. A little higher up on that chart is a lap dance at a club. Now these things are acceptable in some relationships. However, they know about it and both agree that it isn’t anything bad. That is fine if it works. Just keep in mind that even if it works, it probably won’t work lol. So the answer isn’t clear cut. For me it is cheating unless both of us were there or like at a bachelors party she knew of what will go on. Respect each other.

hahahmm · Answer

Depends: 1.) Did you establish clear rules for the relationship AT THE START that allow for this & to which your woman agreed by staying with you? 2.) If you did not do #1, does your woman approve of this & is she the type who doesn't change her mind every day/week/month.

Moose304 · Answer

What is hot? What is cold? What is your favorite pizza topping? Do you like Pepsi or Coke? How fast is too fast? I could ask these kinds of questions all day. Are lap dances considered cheating? Cheating is in the eyes of the beholder. So yes a lap dance is cheating, but then again a lap dance is not cheating. One more thing. Anybody that is attempting to answer this question? What source are you using?

Shayyyy1 · Answer

Uh yes y tf he at a stripe club in the first place. That's like saying u vegetarian but getting a burger at Burger King.

Googlemyahoo · Answer

I’ve had lap dances where the girl practically fucked me with only a towel between my dick and her where I could feel her vagina through it.

So yes. Cheating.

If your girlfriend went to a male strip club and grabbed a strippers dick is that cheating?

kinkynicci · Answer

I think it is up to each couple. I personally would not care. She is just there to do her job. He isn't getting anything other than a dance.

Dazed0N0Confused · Answer

Not in my opinion, but I'd at least like to know you're going to the strip club.

Blackcosmo · Answer

If your partner is uncomfortable with it then it is cheating.

Kelly6 · Answer

Not at all i give lap dance daily as my job

littlemisslolita · Answer

Not At All. I Don’t Think Anything Is Cheating Tbh.

CasaNorba · Answer

pretty much. I've done a lot of things with strippers during lapdances that can fairly be considered cheating. I confess I'm guilty of this

AimeeKyle · Answer

Going to a strip club, no. Lap dance, maybe. Depends on your relationship and what you both agree is acceptable.

I rarely ever go…and if I do I prefer to take my SO/girlfriend with me. It can be kinda fun to get some drinks and people watch.

LostGirl9 · Answer

If he goes regularly yes, if it’s like a one time thing for a bachelor party I don’t think I’d care much

Faith18letsgo · Answer

I think probably yes because it’s being physically sexual with another person. You can ask your bae how they feel about it though.

RedStiletto88 · Answer

I’m the one my husband comes to for lap dances among other fun activities. ❤️

maximumpower · Answer

Would initially say "No;" however, it really depends upon the asker's determination of what constitutes "cheating."
Although at least one may get "excited," both are clothed and no fluids are exchanged. Furthermore, there is no intimate thought/emotions/feelings between them.

Literalbillionaire17 · Answer

In my opinion yes bc it’s like you know what you’re thinking about when you’re getting rubbed on and stuff during a lap dance 😂

Anonymous · Answer

No it’s just a paid service
If going to A spa and the women there gives the men a massage front and back is that cheating.. she touched him right?
Same as strip club..
unless he has sex that’s cheating

Grubhub · Answer

Probably not, haven’t been to the strip club in over 10 years. When I went to vip as a young adult the things she were doing prob would be considered cheating. That ass was huge, she literally told me “ All you wanna do is slap my ass”? She previously told me there’s no sex in this club. 😂

DermalPunch · Answer

The intention isn't cheating generally but it is wholly disrespectful and would be a cause for the dissolution of my relationship.

Anonymous · Answer

Depends on your partner. Some women I know it's a horrible betrayal to. To other women I know, they'd rather thir SO pester a stripper than her with thier horiness.. 🤣

As long as it's just fun to you. And she doesn't feel hurt or disrespected by it I think it's OK.

Anonymous · Answer

geez. I really don't know. but if you love your girl so much she will never find that out lol

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

I guess it's not if you're going to a normie strip club. I usually end up fucking though. Most of those places are just brothels under the guise of "just stripping." Makes it legal... sort of.

jestergent · Answer

Honestly, would you do anything to harm your partner? Cheating is an understatement. Might ask would you cause harm, cheat, partner swapping.. (hypergamy), do anything to break a connection? Anything that harms...

Adam1978 · Answer

I think that is up to each couple to decide. Personally I don't see why a person with a partner should be in a strip club in the first place. So it shouldn't even be a question.

Lionman95 · Answer

I think it´s dangerous territory to say the least because it makes a guy aroused and get turned by a woman he´s not in a relationship with. So it´s something to avoid as a taken or married guy.

ochitougly · Answer

I don’t think so. But I wouldn’t date a man that is into that type of stuff…

DizzyDesii · Answer

Its the uttermost disrespect and i would not keep dating him

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