I want my boyfriend to shave and he won't. Who is at fault here?

[Anonymous]

my boyfriend grew out a beard and it hate it. for one it looks hideous on him. it makes him look like a bum. but if he wants to look like a bum, whatever, it's on him.

but it's just so scratchy! I won't let him kiss me or put his face near me at all because it honestly gives me rug burn.

i asked him to shave and now he's mad at me and not speaking to me because I'm trying to change him and also because I won't kiss him.

[FlightAuror2]

Do you shave your legs daily? I shave my beard daily mostly because of my job, I had a slight beard (evident in profile pic) that never got longer than a sixteenth of an inch, but as soon as I shaved my girlfriend said it felt a lot nicer, and basically said to never stop shaving lol. I can understand the whole "sandpaper against your face" bit, but it is his face, and he can do as he pleases. If it doesn't please you and you're willing to end the relationship because of his beard, then so be it, go your separate ways. He probably has a reason for growing it out if he's being this stubborn about it, so do ask as has been mentioned. Who's at fault doesn't matter because in a relationship it takes two to tango, and right now you're just stepping on each others' feet. Talk about it, understand each other, get back to dancing, or find a new partner.

[Asker]

yes I do shave daily

[steve1122]

Sorry, but it's normal for men to have beards. That's the way we were made- it's a natural male attribute, like having a deep voice, broad shoulders and muscles.

What if he wanted you to buzz your hair off because he didn't like it? That wouldn't go over too big, would it? Probably because having longer hair is one way you have of expressing your femininity. So what's so wrong with him expressing his masculinity? You could suggest that he have it trimmed nicely, but don't force anything on him.

You're making a big deal over nothing- get over yourself! I have a beard myself- I might shave it in the spring and let it grow back in the winter... so what? it's just a style thing.

[SophieaWoods11]

if your so up for him shaving his berd then you can threaten not to shave your legs anymore. I don't know if that will work but it might. Or if your going to be an adult about it then you can maby ask him to put lotion on his face so the hairs are not a corse. It's probally not going to last too long consiidering he's near your age group he's probally just trying it out to try it out. Chill back for a wile and don't get so negative about it try telling him the positive things about the berd. ya never know you might grow to like it.

[cun7n1nja]

My boyfriend has facial hair, sometimes a full beard, and we never have this issue. =/ I like facial hair on him for one, but I also have sensitive skin, yet I don't get rubbed raw kissing him at all. Maybe when he's just stubbly, because then it's like sandpaper. But when it grows out a little, I feel no irritation whatsoever.

[madiocre]

It's his face ...and it's your own face. In other word if he wants to keep it it's up to him you shouldn't demand he shave it...but he shouldn't demand you continue kissing him when it scratched you... The conditioner advise sounds good too.

[Ricardo_Palma]

Its nobody's fault. You should allow him to do things that he wants to do and that are not harming your relationship. Looks should not matter if you guys have seen each other in every single possible situation. Though if his beard is giving you rug burns that can be a problem. But there is a very easy solution. Apply a lot of hair conditioner and trust me you won't want him to shave. My Girlfriend doesn't let me shave but she pushes me to apply conditioner regularly.

[Anonymous]

i can see where you are coming from, but you need to be more open minded and look at his side as well. if it was me, I would compromise a bit, maybe he can trim down the beard a little to the point where it come scratch you, but he can still have a little bit of a beard going on

[Mr_Solo_Dolo]

Maybe he has a purpose behind it. Ask him why he decided to grow it out and if he ever plans on shaving it. Either way good luck.

[Apodyopsis]

Jeez don't be so sensitive dude. Get over it, beards and stubbles are hot.

[Asker]

i think beards and stubble are hideous and make guys look like trailer trash, but to each his own

[Butterfly_kisses09]

Well, it's his face. He can do what he wants. But you don't have to kiss him. Go long enough without kissing him and he'll probably shave it.

[Habakkuk]

well, it's not mustache-March OR no-shave-November, so I don't know what he's doing, but he needs to get over himself..

[Asailum]

well, just say me or the beard your choice since it bothers you this much

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

get over it my boyfriend has a beard but he trims it .

[thoronmegil]

It's his choice not to, but if it bothers you that much, just break up with him.

[-StillWater-]

Let him be for a while. See what happens.

[buttercup5]

You are, ma'am.

[buttercup5]

To be fair I should mention that his not talking to you because of it isn't exactly right, either.