I've lost interest because it became clear that the boyfriend was irresponsible, lazy, lacked ambition, and we just grew apart.
The first boyfriend cheated, but we had already been growing apart before that. When we met, both of us were involved in volunteerism and had groups and hobbies. When we moved in (post graduating uni), he stopped volunteering and doing hobbies. All he did was work and then play video games when he got home. I took up martial arts and performance drumming, and was out of the house many nights. I got him into DnD, too.
He basically became a total homebody with little in common with me, while I expanded my hobbies and activities and outgrew him.
My second boyfriend seemed nice enough, but it became clear the longer we spent time together that he was an incompetent manchild. Totally irresponsible, also lazy, ambition but no work ethic.
To me, it seems the common thread was the natural distance that happens when one partner (me) is focused on growth and development while the other (my exes) were focused on comfort and stagnation.
I outgrew them. Now I know when I look for my next girlfriend that I need someone equally as ambitious and growth focused as I am, and someone who walks her talk.
the more you get to know about your boyfriend/girlfriend the more you start to see their imperfections. more of their flaws. and sometimes people don't want to deal with those flaws. sometimes you see that you can't even relate to each other. nothing in common to bond over. just to name a few reasons.
Many times the person’s behavior just wears on you. Other times your life circumstances change. You just get tired of trying to invest in someone who seems to refuse to put any level of comparable effort back into you. I don’t believe in the concept of “outgrowing“ your partner. I think that people make an active choice to disregard their partner’s wants and needs over the course of the years of the relationship, and then they have the nerve to call it “happenstance“ when their neglect catches up with them
People aren't perfect and it's actually quite easy for them to get on each other's nerves.
My ex-wife was bossy, messy, deceptive, secretive, and had a negative attitude a lot of the time. If she wasn't so cute and sexy I probably wouldn't have put up with her for as long as I did. The woman I was involved with after her was extremely emotional. At first I liked that I could be her support system and she always needed me. Eventually I grew tired of her complaining and I would just ignore it.
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u never happened to me personally... but I've seen it happening with others, and sometimes is a bit obvious that some people rush into situationships, or they get into for only one reason or a couple of reason (usually just the sex) and when that one reason is no longer new or it is not exactly what they expected or idealized... that is when they start losing interest very quickly...
Maybe it's that they're spending a little *too* much time together and are not giving each other the personal space they need. It could be that they know their partner in and out and want to experience something new. Could be that one of them just isn't happy in the relationship anymore. There could be tons of reasons why people lose interests in one another.
If we have more differences than similiarities... or if we want the same thing but at different stages in life... or if we feel forced to change/compromise
One day she did something that really bothered me and suddenly I did not see her the same way. I realized that this was who she was and she would never change.
Repeat question about once a week.
- boredom
- whining
- lost patience for bullshit
- mind games
- "emotion"
- clingy vine
- desire to be free of psycho
the list goes on and on...
Not enough common interests, different values, boredom. They may secretly resent something about you.
One is there character and the manner they put words together in most cases
The excitement of getting a new plaything that override’s the old!
Bored.
When the sex stops.
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