Virgin 27M with older experienced woman, how to deal with certain things?

[Anonymous]

I'm 27 and still a virgin. I work out often to maintain a certain physique, am tall, heavily tattooed and told I'm supposedly attractive, I just had other things going on in my life, career to pursue, studies to accomplish, and tbh I don't know, I just didn't realize that maybe I should go do stuff. I wanted to be with someone I loved when I was younger and always have but as I got older I just got more and more nervous.

I'm with someone now who's older than me and I love her a lot. I love that she knows what to do and can kinda guide me. Hopefully that's a plus for her and not a con. But at the same time... I just can't help but feel kinda less whenever she mentions exes and stuff. Like at my age I know she'd been doing it for a decade and I just I don't know, makes me wonder if it will be as special and intimate for her as it will be for me when we get down to it. She's done so much stuff with so many men before me, what's left? How can anything we do be special or interesting or fun for her? I sometimes feel I can never be more than just the next guy in the line or the loser virgin to her that she deflowers and takes off and I know that's wrong. Sometimes the image of her with all kinds of guys before me creeps in and I just feel like I don't know.
I guess I'm also scared I'm so old compared to everyone else who has a first that in a few years my sex drive will die and I won't get to be that "young stud who lasts forever" for her. I don't know what, if any age that starts but it concerns me.

[genericname85]

well if you're worried about performance, set the expectations straight. for yourself and for her as well.

like you can't expect to get on a bike and ride it like a seasoned pro when you're doing it the first time. you have to come to terms with that and i think most experienced people are understanding of that, so tell her. they will not beat you up or break up if you don't perform well. just take it slow. see how it goes and get better. that's how we all do it, no matter when in live we start.

[DavidRaul]

I don't think it would matter to her. Most women don't even care about your virginity. If you both love each other , i don't think you would face any problem. I don't think you have lost anything. You focused on your career rather than sleeping around and partying, wasting your time just like most of the youth is doing. You are way better than most of them out there. She is lucky to have you

[Asker]

I guess but I only really got anywhere notable in my career in the last few months tbh all those years were, yeah, I guess travelling and developing skills.
I'm pretty sure most women care if a man is a virgin by my age, most think it's weird or something.
Especially her age, I don't get what my value is here.

[Aphrodite801]

You sound very insecure. If you can’t deal with the fact that she has slept with others like most people have then leave her alone. Even though you love her so that would be your loss. Thanks.

[Asker]

Gee thanks, make me feel like shit for being insecure about it, that's awesome.

[WhitneySnow]

Don’t be scared. If she really loves you all that other stuff won’t matter to her.

[Anonymous]

Totally understandable man. But know if your putting in the effort that that is what matters. If any of this is a problem, then the problem is with HER, not you.