Girls, Opinion on what you ladies believe is right or wrong in this situation im in read additional details for more info Hint: (Triangulation)?

Long story short, My partner of 7.5 years and I have had a very toxic and abusive relationship. She has BPD & I dont have any personality disorders. We've both done things to hurt the other but to be quite honest, I believe wholeheartedly that the damage she has done to me is very very very much more and severe than what I've done to her..

And the thing im asking about will probably explain why since mid 2017 I've been loyal to this girl, can't say that for the first part of the relationship (2015-2017), but i learned my lesson and became a loyal man. In 2019 my partner unfortunately.. sadly got her 3rd abortion and it really traumatized her, she's gone through a lot of trauma herself but doesn't quite grasp what it means to be mature enough to not let her trauma make her act out in ways that are irrational and very abusive.

Since 2019 she's cheated on me multiple times with about 5 different guys, having sex with everyone of them. she's told me that everyone of them were disappointing in bed, plus according to her, werent as well endowed as I am. but after i found out about the 3rd guy she cheated on me with I broke up with her and right afterwards she started hanging out with her old friend jacob... who allegedly took advantage of her when she was on xanax..

since August 2021 she's had this guy in her life that she isn't attracted to but she felt obligated to entertain him. She says she loves me and that she wants to get better, that she'll do anything she can to prove that she loves me, only me. but she lives with jacob, they have separate rooms and I see her everyday.

he doesn't want me in the house. Im currently homeless and if it was you in this situation would you help me by sneaking me into the house for a shower while he was at work so i could clean myself? Because she doesn't, i can't shower anywhere and im suffering. I just want to wash so i can job hunt & i feel like a real ride or die would never choose the affair partner over the OG partner

Girls, Opinion on what you ladies believe is right or wrong in this situation im in read additional details for more info Hint: (Triangulation)?
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