Is it weird for a man not to pay for things on a date etc?

[Anonymous]

I do not in anyway shape or form expect a man to pay for me, BUT my friends are making it seem like he should be so I just wanted to see what others thought. We haven’t even been dating very long. Only since the end of November and we’ve only known each other since May. He’s a really sweet guy and he treats me well. We recently went bowling with some friends and out of habit I just paid and he said I didn’t have to pay for him etc. He bought my drinks for the rest of the night while we were out. Seemed pretty fair to me but according to my friends he should’ve paid for everything? I find that a bit ridiculous but whatever. He lives further away and comes to visit me on weekends. I’ve ordered food a few times and I’ve paid and this past weekend he gave me money for his food. I don’t see anything wrong with it but now I’m second guessing cuz my friends are kind of filling my head with shit. He’s never actually offered to pay for me but has for himself. He has confided in me about finances in the past so I always just figured he was tight on money and that’s why I never cared about it. Plus who says a man has to pay for everything? It should be 50/50. Should I buy him something for Christmas should I not? I don’t want him to feel bad if he can’t for me and I don’t want him to feel obligated either by asking him if we should get gifts for each other.

[CindyRuns]

I don't necessarily worry about it being 50/50, but, when I was dating, I probably paid about as much as the guys I went out with. There were dates that I paid for the whole thing, dates my boyfriend paid for the whole thing and times where one of paid for dinner and the other paid for tickets to a show, sports event or concert.

This isn't the old days where women sat home waiting to be found by some guy who would marry her and take care of her.

I have (and had) a very good paying job... no reason why I shouldn't pay for some of the cost of dating.

[Anonymous]

You’re the type of lady men want. While most men will pay it’s the thought that counts. But a girl who expects that a man should pay is full of shit. She wants to be traditional but guarantee you she isn’t even a virgin. Some even have kids w out marriage but still want a traditional man lol ok but you can get a traditional man if you aren’t traditional yourself. If it works out for you both that way that’s fine. What works for some doesn’t always work for others. My girl would do the same, we’re still together after 13 years. Consider this. How many of your girlfriends actually have a man they’ve been w for a long time? Now if a number of them don’t have a man than I wouldn’t be listening to their advice. You paid for one thing, he paid for another.

[Guy13]

It is weird to me but I am a traditionalist.

[UniquelyBasic]

Do what works for you two. If its absurdly one sided in who pays then it could be an issue depending on what you both expect from the relationship.

[Anonymous]

My respect for you. You're the good one. Your friends are low profile gold diggers. 50/50 is good. It doesn't even have to be 50/50 on point. Variation is okay. But ultimately your thought process about this matter counts, which i praise.

[Asker]

Thank you!

[harrison102]

It depends because I went on a date and paid for the food she didn’t pay for anything and turned out to be a horrible cow so I think keep is sweet you should pay for your own food and drink

[Anonymous]

Expecting a grown woman to be prepared to pay for herself isn't weird.

[Asker]

That’s what I’m saying but apparently my friends think it’s weird 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Opinion Owner]

You just have some bums for friends.

I don't mind paying, but I can't stand the entitlement of some women.

[Alicerayne]

Keep it 50/50 so he or she will not think that you owe them sex for Dinner xp

[Anonymous]

I always pay n i love spending money on girls