Everyone thinks we'll sleep together?

[Anonymous]

So I was seeing a girl for a while and she began playing games and I felt she was being childish, whereas she thought I was needy and she lost all sexual chemistry with me.

Fast forward a while and we meet up at a party and sleep together. We begin to hang out but only as friends, because the last time was such a mess and now there's no pressure on anything and as she said she "doesn't see me that way" anymore.

There were quite defined boundaries at the start. No touching or anything remotely romantic or date like and it was very much a "friend" thing. Time has passed now and things are different. She's at my house every day and is close with my family. She wants me to meet her family and we hang out and text all the time. We're like two big children together and we loving being around eachother because we're always happy. We maintain we're just friends, but people are adamant we're not and soon enough we'll be together. She comes over to my house and we get into bed together to watch movies, but there's no cuddling etc and if I even touch her she moves back. We hug eachother every day but they're never long hugs. We tease eachother all the time and the touching is inconsistent. Some days she'll touch me quite often and seem like she loves me, I'll hold her thigh or even smack her ass and she laughs and we even play fight, however other days if I'm even sitting too close she moves away or if we accidentally touch she says it's too close.

Flirting is some days a no, and other days I can tell her I'd sleep with her again and she doesn't mind. I myself am not sure if I'd risk our friendship at this rate, but we're now going on holiday together. Separate beds but same room. All our friends think we're being a couple without the sex, and that we're going to relax and have drinks in the sun and sleep together all holiday. I get their point, and sometimes I think we're both worried to risk it. But then I feel I'm looking too into it and she doesn't like me

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you and this girl have a complicated relationship that is difficult to define. It's understandable that you are feeling confused about the situation and what your next steps should be.

It's important to have open and honest communication with this girl about your feelings and intentions, and to listen to her perspective as well. It's possible that she may not want to risk the friendship by entering into a romantic relationship. On the other hand, she may have feelings for you but is hesitant to act on them.

It's also important to set clear boundaries and expectations for your holiday together. If you are not comfortable sharing a bed or engaging in any physical intimacy, make sure that you communicate this with her beforehand. This can help prevent any misunderstandings or uncomfortable situations.

Remember that it's okay to take things slow and figure out what you both want from this relationship. It's important to prioritize open communication, mutual respect, and honesty. Consider seeking the help of a couples therapist or mediator if you feel that you need additional support in navigating this complex situation.

[Asker]

When she comes over to watch a movie we get into bed, but during some of them she gets very tired, yet still drives home at 2am after the movies and chats.
One of of those days where it feels like she loves me it was the day we actually began talking about and planning the holiday. We had gone shopping and she wanted to carry my bags for me, she was constantly touching me and I felt like we were both really into eachother that day for some reason.
I told her that if she gets tired after the movies she can just spend the night in bed with me. She said she'd like that, but id have to accept that she'd take the blanket off me. She joked around about it but said she'd be happy to, but a few days later she said that she never said she'd share the bed and the other day I could see she was falling asleep and I told her that she could just stay, she told me she'd never spend the night with me because we're not together and she wants to go home which I found odd.

She didn't want to share a bed on holiday and preferred separate rooms, yet chose a room where we share a bed and they're right beside eachother.

I told her on holiday I'd probably walk around our apartment in just my underwear and I'd need her to put suncream on me and she was fine with both.

We're going to Spain and want to try tapas, but I told her the thing I was looking forward to doing most on holiday in our room was tap ass. She just looked at me and smirked.

I suppose some days there's strong boundaries in our friendship and certain days we can't stop touching eachother and it feels pretty obvious we want eachother, but then the following time we hang out I go to see how it is and the boundaries are back in place which is why I'm confused, because it's never consistent

[Opinion Owner]

It sounds like there is a lot of ambiguity and inconsistency in your relationship with this girl, which can be confusing and frustrating. It's important to have clear and open communication about your feelings and intentions, as well as to respect each other's boundaries and comfort levels.

It's possible that this girl is also feeling uncertain or conflicted about her feelings toward you and the nature of your relationship. It's important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding, and to avoid putting pressure on her to make a decision or commit to anything that she's not comfortable with.

If you're interested in exploring a romantic relationship with her, it may be helpful to have an honest conversation with her about your feelings and intentions, while also being prepared to respect her decision if she's not interested or not ready.

Take things slow, be mindful of each other's boundaries and feelings, and make sure that you're both on the same page before taking any further steps.

[Twalli]

You're acting like a couple, because of the time you spend together.

[Anonymous]

Move on. Nothing happening here.