His ex posted something that implied she was losing care for him and since then he’s posted us less where she can see, but is more where she can’t see…
From what I can gather they broke up because she was the first person he dated after his divorce which I don’t believe he was over. He still has some of his ex wife’s family on his social media too and I thought him posting is so much may be to try and get back at her, hoping her close ones would tell her maybe as he’s not connected to her directly on social media anymore.
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What are the time intervals between his relationships? This sounds like he moves too fast and hasn’t taken adequate time to heal.
I completely agree. I don’t think he does take much time between relationships, I don’t think he likes to be alone, I think he feels more respected when in one. He says he’s taken longer than I think he has as certain things just don’t add up.
He said his ex said she just can’t do it anymore, and he was apparently blind sighted and didn’t know why it happened, which I find hard to believe. That makes me wonder what it is that he doesn’t want to say.
Between me and his ex I’m not even sure if it was 3 months.
I don't know about you but when I learn little things about my bfs ex, I really try to see her side of it because I know sometimes a man’s interpretation of the situation can be a lot different than how we experienced it. From an outside perspective, even if there’s not much info I could see how his ex got fed up. This guy was married and if it was a messy split he probably will never want to get married again, and as a result of that he just doesn’t act like a great partner in general. She probably got sick of feeling like a secret or like he wasn’t completely over his ex-wife, and to me that makes more sense than him acting blind-sided. She probably realized that she was tired of dealing with a man who just wasn’t ready, and now I think you’re having this experience as well.
It’s a sucky situation because while I understand that as a man he has needs and wants companionship, it’s unfair to pull in women like yourself and his recent ex who are actually ready for relationships while he really isn’t.
Yeah I’m the same, I always think there’s truth between two peoples accounts (unless one was abusive). It’s never just the one side of the story. Yeah you may be right.
The trouble is he says and does all of the right things, but then you know when you don’t feel it in your gut, so then it’s also hard to try and bring up to address too.
Maybe him holding onto the past is his way of self sabotaging and not wanting to fully commit to anything.
I think women have such brilliant insight, but I’m also still interested to hear some guys views on this too.
Gut feelings are tricky because since it’s not evidence you can’t bring it to him and in most cases he’ll feel accused then turn you into the bad guy. Instead I just trust my intuition and act on that. Like have I left a guy in the past because things didn’t feel right? Yep, and I didn’t lose any sleep over it. At the end of the day you can’t sacrifice your peace of mind for a man, ever. So when this guy is being secretive about you, still watching his ex and all that then of course it’s going to not sit right and it’s not worth the trouble. So I’m not necessarily trying to suggest you leave the relationship, I’m just saying that you come first.
Yeah I know. He’s not secretive about me elsewhere so maybe he’s just trying to protect her feelings on that platform while also supporting mine on all others. But yes I think he does still watch her stories and sometimes like them although not often undone think as I never see her contact him. Although he did once when we were away from each other.
Why is he caring about another woman’s feelings to that extent? Especially an ex? That’s very odd and toxic to me,
I don’t know. He is quite soft underneath I feel, but I also think he can be a little manipulative.
He said he’d always care about his exes.
Very strange. How do you feel about all this ultimately?
Confused honestly, just trying to figure it out at the moment.
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