According to you, what are some of the important questions you should ask before getting into any relationship?

[StarWarGirl]

[MrOracle]

You should be focused on your potential partner's morals, values, and life goals (and, of course, you should be prepared to answer all of these questions for them, too).

Do they want a serious, committed relationship? Do they want to get married? Do they want to have kids? Are they religious, and if so, what are the details of their religion, and how they expect it to affect your relationship?

What is their career? What are their future career plans - will they need to move, change shifts, travel, etc. as they progress in their career? What is their income and what is their likely future income potential? What debts and assets do they have?

What kind of lifestyle do they live, and what lifestyle are they expecting to have in 5, 10, 20, and 30 years? What plans do they have to reach those goals?

How is their relationship with their family, and what was it growing up? What family obligations, if any, do they have, or expect to have? Do they have a parent who might need elder care, or financial assistance? Is there a family business that they might need to take over, or sell, or shut down?

Where do they want to live (big city, suburbs, rural?) and where geographically? If he wants NYC and you want Miami or Ohio, that's not going to work, is it?

How does he know the difference between right and wrong? Does he understand the concept of actions having consequences? Or that authority and responsibility needing to be balanced (you cannot be responsible for things over which you have no authority, and you cannot have authority without also taking responsibility for the things you have authority over). This might SOUND simple, but you might be surprised at how many people see no connection between these things.

What red flags are they worried about with you? Are they concerned with your drinking/partying/smoking/drugs/clubbing? Are they worried about you gaining weight? Are you worried about their hair thinning, or a beer gut developing?

I could go on, but you get the idea. You don't necessarily need to ask all of these in a single setting, but you should cover all of these and more before you make any commitment to each other.

Don't expect to get "ideal" answers to every question - that almost never happens - but can the two of you find a compromise in the areas where you don't match up? Can you both let certain things go without bringing them up and holding them against each other over the long term?

Most people don't do ANY of this work ahead of time, and it's no surprise that their relationships are a disaster and fail so often. Better to "fail" it before you make the initial commitment than to fail it later, after your lives are interwoven and will be difficult and costly (financially and emotionally) to untangle.

[caring__1]

Find out how their view of relationships has changed over time and what changes they expect in the future.

Here are some questions you can explore together:

When you were young (8-10 years old) and saw people in relationships, what did you believe were the reasons they chose to be in those relationships?

After you had relationship experiences of your own, how did that picture change?

What did you discover about yourself and potential partners as a result of your relationship experiences?

What did you learn from your relationship experiences?

What changes did you make in yourself as a result of that acquired knowledge?

What would be your reason for wanting to be in a relationship? In other words, what can you get from being in a relationship that you can't get by not being in a relationship?

What do you expect of a partner in a relationship?

What can a partner expect of you in a relationship?

Relationship-wise, how do you see your life 20 years from now?

[jennifer_bloom]

What are your financial priorities? How do you plan on integrating religion or non religion into your life, your friendships and your children’s life? What are your fitness standards for yourself, your future wife and your children? Do you care how much money your friends make? How do you intend to transmit good values to your future children? What are your emotional or lifestyle or behavioural boundaries? What is your idea on how equal or unequal gendered relationships are? Is the income or home making choices of a woman a deal breaker to you on either spectrum? How much do you plan on involving your parents or sisters or brothers or in laws into your lives during this process? What would your response be if you felt disrespected by your girlfriend or wife? At what age would you suspend your financial support towards your children?

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Obviously there’s the big ones:
1. Do I want kids?
2. Do I want shared or independent finances?
3. Do I want to get married?


But there’s also some smaller things too:
1. Do I want a companion or do I want a fuck buddy?
2. What’s my go-to first date idea?
3. Which is more important: liking the same things or hating the same things?
4. What am I unwilling to compromise on?
5. What is my goal in getting into this relationship?
6. Who do I want to be? And will dating this person help me be that version of myself?

[Pinay_ako]

• Are you single? Divorcing? Still in a relationship? Breaking up? Just broke up but are you over them? Am I going to be a rebound? What are you trying to get out of this? Are you looking to get laid only? What are your short term goals? Long term goals? Are you a one woman man or are you polyamourous? Do you like kids? Pets? What are your pet peeves?

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

Ideally, I’d like to know early on Whether he wants to have children someday or not, I do want them someday and I’d not want to waste my time with anyone who doesn’t want them.

[Rei13]

You should make sure your morals and goals align. It especially gets more important the older you get. You want to know if they plan on marrying or not, if they want kids and how many, what does their career path look like, where do they see themselves living/buying a home/etc, is religion important to them, what are their political views (don’t have to match, obviously, but are your morals when it comes to those views similar on the important things), what are their timelines, etc etc. Are they good with their money or are they irresponsible? Lots of things tbh. Let’s say they want 5 kids and you want zero, obviously you’re incompatible if neither of you are willing to compromise (for example maybe two) as one person will be unhappy and may resent the other person

[AaronKrieger]

- What are you wanting out of this relationship? (Short or Long Term)

- Are you ready to be in a relationship? I don't even mean just mentally, but where you are in life.

- Are you rushing things?

- Is this person a good influence?

- Do you both want the same things within 5 to 10 years from now?

- Are the needs/wants in your relationship for both of you going to be met?

- Will the beliefs you two hold cause issues down the road? I'm talking how to raise a kid, politics, etc.

- Would this person be a good mother/father?

I do not end up forming relationships until we have been talking/dating for a few months. These questions might seem dramatic, but I will not have an actual relationship with someone who I wouldn't at least mind having kids with in the beginning incase it happens.

[Brittanyroseee]

Is he responsible with money? Does he have money? Does he have a career? Has he ever cheated? Also loyalty is a HUGE thing. I want someone obsessed with me and only me. I also like men who give off that “cocky” “dominant” attitude but also have a loving side to them. He also has to be fine with me getting pets because i love animals.

[serious]

I would have certain set of questions in mind but they will be related to my standards, my criteria more than anything else.

The question will be such that I would like to see if the woman is mature, does not play any manipulative mind games of any sort for whatever reasons and one who will always be sweet, nice, kind and caring, loyal or not.

[inhua]

answers that would be needed

future of relationship status e. g. does she want kids or not?

type of people who her friends and family are e. g. are they promiscuous/degenerates or are they family-orientated?

body count e. g. knowing whether there will be drama/baggage or not?

current financial situation e. g. whether she has debt or not. jobless doesn't matter

relationship beliefs e. g. is she respectful/loyal/caring/feminine/nurturing/protective?

[petitedollbabee]

Seeing if you’re compatible with long term goals. Do both of you want kids? Do both of you want to get married one day? Do you both want to remain in your city or move elsewhere? If one of you wants these things but the other does not, then you’re not compatible. Big life decisions such as kids, marriage and living in a different city, should not have to be compromised on!

[HighValue]

Make sure you have compatible morals and compatible long term life goals.

For example, do each of you want or not want kids in the future? Do either people party and do drugs/heavy alcohol drinking? What moral/political views does each person have? Does either person want a more stay at home life or a life of frequent traveling?

What are their views on casual sex and exclusivity?

[IceCreamSandwich]

Do you want/have any kids or pets?

Where are you planning on living long-term?

What do you value and hate in a man?

What kind of food do you like to eat?

What kind of work do you do/want to do?

[exitseven]

The way things are today i would start

https://www.youtube.com/embed/LHrqEEzagVo

[Sasha0426]

1) What’s your SSN?
2) What was your first pet?
3) What’s your mother’s maiden name?
4) Who was your best friend in school?






I’m totally joking 🤣 Don’t ask these questions.

[HitsyHonesty]

What do they want and is it in line with what I want from this relationship? This can be the little things but the big things as well.

[RedInnocent68]

What’s your favourite Star Wars film? If they’ve never watched one, it’s a deal breaker. Bonus points if they can rank them! Just start house shopping then and there 😂

[havingfun2023]

Offspring? No offspring? Yes to having offspring? Someday? No someday, ever? And case closed 🔒🔐

[Brittanyroseee]

Damn y'all be obsessed with having kids so much that it doesn’t matter if she is a good person or not

[havingfun2023]

Lol no i don't want kids or offspring that's what I meant

[Brittanyroseee]

Oh😂😂😂😂😂

[sheikalana]

What are your plans for the future?
Do you see us together in the future?
What are your expectations?

[RavVid]

I think about family, friends and past relationships. Why the later broke up what didn't work that sort of stuff.

[strateguy632]

do you expect me to be exclusive only you, and will you be exclusive.

[FunkyMonkee]

Are you married? Are you rich? Answer the second question first!

[Anonymous]

Does insanity run in your family?

Paper or plastic?

Innie or outtie?

Star trek or star wars?

Marvel or DC?

Who shot first Han or Greedo?

You know, the basics.