Ladies, when vetting a potential partner for a relationship. What is the impact of his playing for sex on your decision?

[Anonymous]

In what situation you will say it's justified and it's not?

Take in to account he is the one telling you.

[SueShe]

Sex, fornication and copulation play no role whatsoever if I was forced to chose a person for a long term relationship. This occupation takes less one single percent of your adult awake time, yet, like you, it seems to have prevalence over the 99 other percent of that time.

If I had to vet a potential partner, then it would be someone that has a great character, personality and intellect. A person you can have a great conversation with and that does not make any dirty jokes, that does not have innuendos and double meaning ideas. It would be someone that does not place sex on the top of his activities and does not think about it 24/7.

As a matter of fact, sex would be a deterrent in my choice for a potential partner. Thank goodness, I am not interested in the least to date.

[Asker]

First thing first. We both share the same opinion on how important is should be. And that the other characteristics are more important than sex. Thanks for that.

The topic was not about how important is sex in a LTR. Put yourself in the situation and contribute.

Second. You say that you want good communication, and intellect. Then you write a reply saying I value sex too much, when I don’t.
I have met people that put a much bigger emphasis on sex and (like you) that don't. I don’t have to share it, or even respect it they live with it.

This question is asked to see how a tabu subject is treated by different people (whatever they might think).

PS: don't go “he/she asked this question so they probably think this and that” it’s just a petty debate tactic, and you wouldn't get a good conversation/debate from this approach.

[Anonymous]

If I learn that he has paid for sex at any point in his life then it’s an immediate no for me no matter the reason. Hooking up/one night stands I don’t really mind, but paying for sex is a major red flag (in my personal opinion).

[HelpfulWoman]

Honestly? probably a skip.
It's not that hard to get sex for free frankly. So it'd be a red flag about his personality and insecurities that he felt he had to pay for it.

[Asker]

Would asking why, what, when give you information that will sway you either way?

[devilish-cutie]

i wouldn't want a guy that sleeps arund with random people, its a major turn off, so if he payed for it or not it wouldn't matter, it would be better if he was a virgin

[LazerBean]

Any extramarital sex makes him a no for a relationship, and paying for sex make him a no for any association whatsoever.

[Anonymous]

Really? Vetting?

Life is too short for that.

[Asker]

I should have used “considering”.
Bad choice of words.