Should my fiance and I break up?

[Anonymous]

My fiance and i have been together for 7 years. we were planning on getting married as soon as I finish my medical program. But i’ve been having doubts because he is always some how so busy to give me any attention. He doesn’t call me or text me unless I do. When I do call he is sleeping, working or hanging out with his friends. He goes to work then goes to his friends house right after. In between going to his friends house he doesn’t even bother to call me to say hi or even text me. When i bring it to his attention he says that he thought i was busy. Then I call him about five times in a row then texts me tells me that he doesn’t think he can handle this abuse anymore. I told him that we should break up then tells me that he doesn’t want to. this boy doesn’t take me out on any dates, doesn’t give me any attention. i’m not happy with him, nor am i happy with who i am. the only person i can blame is myself. I thought i loved him but at this point in my life i think i loved him for the potential i thought we could have. he has a park right by his house and it’s a chore to have him take me there, but goes freely with his puppy. I don't know im starting to hate him. :(

[Oliverlogan263]

Aw man sis, that sounds like a really tough situation. 7 years is a long time to invest and call off an engagement is a huge decision.

From what you described though, it really doesn't seem like this dude is putting in any effort to make you feel cared for and prioritized, you know? Barely any communication, dates or quality time together is super not cool when you're supposed to be planning your life together.

But on the flip side, suddenly hating someone after so long does make me think maybe your emotions are amplified right now cause you're stressed and unhappy. Breaking up should really only happen if you truly feel in your heart the relationship has run its course.

Maybe take a step back before making any big calls. See how you feel after your programs done and the pressure's off a bit. Consider counseling to work through it properly too if you really want to try saving it

But sis, you don't deserve to settle or force something that's not right for you just cause it's comfortable. At the end of the day, you gotta follow your gut on what will make YOU happy long run. Sending hugs - you've got this!

[Pyrofox]

If its really too much just tell him to put it all on ice.

[RoseySarah]

So sorry this is awful he is so used to you!

The. Used to you being gone not busy and just with his friends... Does he have a good job?

I'd have a real talk with him and then break up!

Marriages need work and that is just a shit finance! He would act this way even if you did get married!

It's so hard finding time for a date! I'd slap my hubby if he acted like our date was a chore!

Sounds like there is very little sex life also!

So sorry here is a big hug. Hate it took 7 years for this!

[BLP11520]

Move on he doesn’t value you anymore 👍

[Anonymous]

He bored from you

[Asker]

why doesn’t he just tell me that?

[Opinion Owner]

Because he don't want to

[Asker]

why? isn’t that dragging us along?

[Opinion Owner]

He don't want to be reason for break-up so he pushed you away so you initiate breakup

[Asker]

i have though. i’ve told him that we should break up and he said “we can but shouldn’t”

[Opinion Owner]

It's a plan if he accepted in first attempt then you will know his plan... lol

[Asker]

i’m so confused lol

[Opinion Owner]

You're such a innocent darling 😘

[Asker]

can you please explain