26 and a virgin - would you care?

Question

I'm 26 and I'm a virgin still.

Nothing weird - I'm pretty, I've had a boyfriend in the past... I'm not waiting until marriage, but I've always thought of sex as something very intimate and something I want to experience with a serious boyfriend who respects it.

I have dated here and there but no serious relationships, so it makes sense for me.

I am 3 months into dating this one guy and things are going really well - I really like him and we are slowly becoming serious (he's already asked me to be his girlfriend and I've met some of his family).

Do you think he'll judge me or that it will scare him off?

SotiCoto · Accepted Answer

The question you're asking at the top isn't the one you want the answer to, is it?

I'm guessing the question you really want answered is the one at the bottom... which is unfortunate, as I doubt anyone can definitively answer that question.

I should probably note though that if you keep treating sex like something special or sacred, you're probably going to be disappointed. It is crude, rough and messy. It is wet, sloppy and undignified. In fact, the human mind in sex mode brainwashes itself NOT to find things disgusting, which is exactly why there are so many depraved sex acts out there. People will do all sorts of insane things when they're horny.
What I mean is that the more you try to put it on a pedestal and control it, the worse it will end up, and you will probably end up completely disillusioned and it could ruin the relationship.

DaveJord · Accepted Answer

If you have guy that has dated you for 3 months with out sex, and you two have come this far together... I would say he would not care. Actually he might be the one, and if you told him... he would love you more.

But three months and he does not know you are virgin, that's kind of odd but at the same time really smart of you. Honestly, if he as not asked and you have not said... this guy will not care. He must be a really great guy.

But it is smart of you to not advertise your virginity... guys get weird about it. But this guy has gone three months without sex, and he want to be your boyfriend... I would say you have done very well for yourself.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Tbh I think it’s really sad that girls are cautious of being a virgin and also having too big of a number.,., at least with guys, it’s more of a one way lane with the more experience they have, the better. I am a virgin too and when I find the guy that I want to lose it to, I would prefer him to be a virgin too. I hope sex can be just something that we experience with each other

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I have a friend in her early thirties that is still one too. She doesn’t advertise being one either because some guys can get extremely creepy about it. So no I don’t think you being one is bad and more people are than you’d probably think. I doubt your guy will care and if he is a decent guy he will go at your pace.

Summeroflove · Answer

Well. Sex should be after marriage and your rihjt it’s a very intimate thing. I think you need to be honest. If he dumps you over that then he isn’t for you.  But I doubt it

CindyRuns · Answer

First, it's great that you stand up for your convictions.

I felt the same way... and the "Right Time" for me was when I was 24. Even though the relationship didn't last, or end in marriage, it was special for me and I have no regrets.

madhatters4 · Answer

if you explain it the way you have here i think he should generally be ok with it. Although at the same time he MIGHT feel like it's a lot of pressure to be someone's first. but me personally totally get your reason for waiting and wouldn't be worried about it

Holsen · Answer

Well girl , yoh soumd just perfect so keep at it and don’t worry about how will he take that, actually if he takes it badly wich I wouldn’t get why then he just wouldn’t be worth it;Personally I’d prefer a virgin girl and furthermore I think also think sex as something too intimate like it’s kind of the last thing that you preogress with someone not the first or second thing right away!!

Lliam · Answer

I seriously doubt if he will have a problem with it or get scared off. He might even find it charming.
It wouldn't bother me unless you were saving yourself for marriage. But under the circumstances, I would be honored if you liked and trusted me enough to be your first. And I would try to make it a tender, pleasurable, special experience.

JacobJordan · Answer

Good for you I was a virgin until about the same age. My wife was a virgin a bit longer. She is a bit older than me. We were each others first. It was one of the requirements I had for a partner. I had no one so my partner had to have no one as well.

Anonymous · Answer

It's entirely individual how someone might react to this information. If your relationship is progressing well and you feel comfortable, consider having an open conversation with him about your feelings and boundaries. A supportive partner will likely respect your choices and appreciate your honesty.

DextroShade · Answer

As long as you are under 30 it okay, but the closer you get to 30 the more of a red flag it becomes. If you didn't give your best years to any man they will wonder why that is and assume (usually correctly) that something is wrong with you. The traditional women who wait until marriage avoid this problem by marrying young.

MysticDevice · Answer

I can't speak for him, but If a girl I was getting serious with told what you just said then she'd have my respect.

Those are reasons I can 100% get behind.

I admire any woman with that level of self respect.

Kabluie · Answer

Had a serious relationship with a 25-year old virgin, she said she was just waiting for the right person, me. It doesn't matter, if the feelings are mutual it'll work itself out.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

I thought that it was strange but you explained it well and now it seems less so. As long as you give him context I don't think he'd midn.

DarkWinterNights · Answer

Men don’t get turned off by a lack of experience. That’s mostly something women tend to think will be a turnoff to men because it’s a turnoff to many women.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

Women's sexuality is usually judged the opposite of mens.. So you being a virgin at 26 either doesn't matter to him at all, or he might even like it..

molonski2 · Answer

I doubt that he will care , he may very well really like the idea.

Drumlin2001 · Answer

It's not an issue, but you should tell him so he can understand how the relationship is progressing

sheikalana · Answer

If I was a man I would care and would keep you. That’s so rare nowadays.

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

If it scares him off then he's not the right person, I doubt it will go down like that.

Philyouup · Answer

my friend didn’t have sex until she was 26. she just wasn’t pushed to get complicated. i think it is ok.

deus_ex_sisyphus · Answer

Thats super rare these days; good on you! tbh though, it'd be neither a turn on/off by a 26 year old with a clean rap sheet

Sasha0426 · Answer

If he judges or runs away, let him. No point keeping him around if he doesn’t accept you for being a virgin.

26 and a virgin - would you care?

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