Have you ever felt like you "have to be" in a relationship? Please read the full description before answering. OK?

[SunnyRS]

Whatever the reason might be Or whatever the relationship maybe whether love, friendship or family have you ever felt a compulsion to stay with them even if you don't want to.
I have, for me it was a friendship, she was my friend in college, we were good but one day she confessed and I didn't feel the same way, I knew she was heartbroken as she cried a lot that day over my shoulder only.
But she was brave, the next day she came and asked me to let's be friends again, it felt a bit awkward to me but I didn't have it in me to deny her that too, so I agreed and it was rough.
So, trust me any relationship based on compulsion never works, it's better to hurt them once and for all rather than hurting them again and again.

Updates

5 mo

I wanted to ask that have ever felt the compulsion of being in a relationship with a person you don't want to be.

[IslaTheWitch]

Yes. Out of love and strong belief, I can help him, and he will change for me because he claimed he loved me.

Of course, it didn't work well...

[SunnyRS]

Yeah it feels like they can change Or they can even put efforts in trying to get better for you but in the end in never works out.

[IslaTheWitch]

It's always in our head. They never think this way...

[SunnyRS]

Yeah that's true

[Monalisa77]

All the time

[SunnyRS]

Oh you don't need to feel that way, good relationships are organic they happen on its own.

[Monalisa77]

I dont have much support or affection in my life, i genuinely think a good guy would really help me, give me motivation and confidence, make my life worth living

[SunnyRS]

He would but for that you don't need to settle for just a man you think is good, you should like him and so does he then only your relationship would work.
And I know you will find such a guy.

[Monalisa77]

Nah im not gonna settle, whoever i go with ill need to want him and all the rest, i dont wanna be with anyone whod make me miserable.

But thing is, i dont get out much. I've had guys flirt with me and suggest meeting outside of wherever we met but it doesn't seem to happen, either timing wise or something puts them off. there's a certain type of guys i like and i do worry i set my bar too high, but i dont think i could go out with someone who i dont like like that, so i can't help it if i dont like guys who would be more suited to me. I've been lucky so far i think the guys i like that are good looking have been flirting with me so there mudt be something in it or hopefully o could find someone i really like

[SunnyRS]

Nothing wrong with having standards which you want in your partner, and if you stick to them you will find what you want.

[Monalisa77]

I put up a similar q

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

Nope.

My family tells me I should keep dating just so I don’t get accustomed to singleness too much, because I seem to enjoy it.

[SunnyRS]

I don't see anything wrong with enjoy being single. I love being single 😅
But if you want to date because you want to great.

[DizzyDesii]

If i have to be? No. If i want to be? If i deserve to be? If i should be? Yes

[SunnyRS]

I might have not coined my question correctly desi but thanks for the reply nonetheless on what you understood my question to be.

[DizzyDesii]

Im saying i dont have to be or need to be in one. But sometimes i question if i should/want/deserve to be

[SunnyRS]

You question yourself that should you or deserve to be in a relationship based on compulsion?
Why?

[DizzyDesii]

I don't know if its in regards to compulsion but i do question if its for me

[SunnyRS]

Is there a reason for that?

[DizzyDesii]

Just thinking about how things have turned out with past relationships

[SunnyRS]

Desi don't let your past decide what you deserve in the future, cause I know you deserve the best

[DizzyDesii]

The past matters. But thank you

[SunnyRS]

It doesn't as long as you have learnt your lessons from it.
You are most welcome

[DizzyDesii]

Pasts will always matter. Karma exists

[SunnyRS]

I won't deny your belief system desi, if you believe in Karma it's your choice but I only believe what we do, the choices we make have tangible consequences, if we learn from them we can do better, be better.
This helps me staying in the present not thinking about past and future.

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

Probably, yes.

I haven't been single since I have been 19.

[SunnyRS]

Thank you for the opinion but I think I did not frame my question correctly.
See the description and the update for clearer view of my question.

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

Replying to the update - yes, a bit because I didn't want to stay on my own, a bit because she insisted.

[SunnyRS]

That's tough, how is that relationship now?

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

It ended after a couple of months.
Then I got into another.

[Nikki1989]

Not have to be. Want to be, sure.

Big difference.

[SunnyRS]

There is a big difference, and it can make a big difference in the lives of the people who have to be and who want to be.

[WhitneySnow]

No but some of my friends have

[SunnyRS]

That sucks for them then, it's a bad situation to be in

[WhitneySnow]

Yeah. Luckily most of them got out of it.

[SunnyRS]

That's great, it is a bad situation to be stuck in

[NathanDavis]

never