Have you ever felt like you were the safe choice for your partner?

Question

GoodManDave · Accepted Answer

Yes. But they didn't want that, so there was nothing to do, but break up. Safe? usually yes. Best thing for them that they won't comprehend until they choose to change? Yes. I don't particularly think I'm the best thing ever for all women, or that I don't have problems - no. But I have known that I'm a good thing for them, I will be their most stable boyfriend (at least until they grow up a little), and I am not a danger to them. But they thought they wanted excitement and drama... or a yes man (go figure) And I'm usually not that, so some will sabotage the relationship - they will pour gasoline on that bridge, set it on fire, immediately cut the ropes, and shoot a bazooka in order to destroy that relationship... even if it stranded them on a dangerous island with no food or water, or other means of escape. They will sabotage, even if it were to destroy them. I'm not interested in that, so I walk away for peace of mind.

love_conquers_lust · Accepted Answer

I think it turned out that way with my ex. I didn't mind some of her quirks she was insecure about. I wanted to protect that about her, make her feel safe being herself around me.

TenderFantasy · Accepted Answer

Not sure I understand. Like he's settling for me? If I suspected that, I'd probably ask him why? I don't know, but if I did feel like he was settling then hey, that's not good! Means they are desperate to be in a relationship with anyone, doesn't matter who. But then, I think I'd still be with them, because I don't think anyone is THAT desperate to be in a relationship. If they WERE, at least he chose me. Either way, he's still choosing to be with me, spending time with me, "tolerating' me for some reason so I guess I'm not as bad to be with as I thought! Hehe.. And being labeled as "Safe" is better than being labeled/known as a DANGEROUS person! If I'm the type that they bring home to momma, I'd actually be PROUD of it! Hehe!

Beckybooboo · Accepted Answer

That’s a tough question. You know me well enough to know I come across as pretty “innocent” and seem inexperienced, which I’m not sure if guys would see that as a “safe” choice or the “right” choice. I’ve never felt like I was a safe choice, mainly because of how the guy always seemed genuinely interested in me and being with me.

Rei13 · Answer

I think for both me and my partner we were both the safe choice for the other person. I don’t think that’s a bad thing though, we both feel really secure in our relationship and being out the best in each other. Also for me whenever I say safe choice it’s that we both knew we were compatible with each other/meshed well versus -insert risky exciting person here- that it would have failed with

RoseySarah · Answer

Moved it for you! Yeah some mods stick anything under sexual when it's not! Trying to get actual questions for that topic!

Apple1996 · Answer

Nah I was the most dangerous choice 😈

Tiptoetamm · Answer

Yes I always felt like my ex settled for me so he wasn't alone. The longer I was with him the more I felt like I was the safe choice for him. Eventually I gave up on the relationship and moved on. It is what it is. Will never go through that again. Being young and dumb ugh

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

So he hasn't given me a reason to. He's said multiple times how lucky he feels. He pulls me closer when he thinks I am asleep. He says my name in his sleep. And if i go get something and leave the room I heard his family or friends ask him how he managed to get me 🥰🥰

mandyfire98 · Answer

I would say I was safe but also a bit different lol. Safe in that if I'm in a relationship I'm all in and loyal. Different because I'm not typical or "normal" I'm outside the norm really.

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

He wanted be so badly, according to him.

I guess I can assume that "safe" was far from his mind.

Besides, he knows that I don't want to be that girl that he simply settled for just because I'm the safe choice.

sawno · Answer

Safe as in I was the comfort option and she could have had something better? Considering she loved me truly for who I was and I needed to move continents for it to work between us I never felt that way no.

HawkPerception · Answer

I'm a guy that girls know wouldn't cheat on them. I'm a homebody and introvert. I can't flirt for my life even if someone was trying to flirt with me. And my morals are pretty decent I think.

I'm average when it comes to looks and not even close to the top 10% of men that most women want so I don't really have options in front of me.

I would assume girls do see me as a"safe choice"

molonski2 · Answer

Gee " Safe " , its a little difficult , I actually think I'm really safe ( especially now ) although on past history something always goes wrong , Safe choice as in , not dangerous , decent community standing , financial to some degree , approval from others , I think I have been that choice previously.

LazerBean · Answer

Yes, id say that we were eachothers safest and best option. I know that you probably meant safe in a negative, not-first-choice kind of way. But it's not always like that.

IslaTheWitch · Answer

No... safe would be to keep a distance from me :D

Anonymous · Answer

Honestly, the guy I’m talking to he’s really nice and really sweet but I’m not interested in him only because I like guys that actually do what the say and do what they want. Like kiss and individual which the guy I’m talking to (not really like him) said he wanted to kiss me. I flat out told him that I like men that would think it and then do it. Not say it and do nothing about it.

Mark987 · Answer

Not safe but I was seeing a woman that we spent a fair amount of time together, because we understood each other completely ( talking wise, sexually). We both knew it wasn't going to be a relationship but more to be friends with benefits, and for someone to spend time with and to lean on when needed.

NathanDavis · Answer

oh no... I wasn't "safe" at all, lmao

TheorionMage · Answer

What do YOU define as 'safe' ?  I define 'safe' as insightful risk vs. worthy significant improvement of potential & long-term circumstances. What I risk, the time invested in return for significant gain of potential circumstances ~  What a Fool believes... the 'wise man' has the power to 'reason' awayWhat a Fool believes... the 'wise man' has the power to 'reason' away --- KNOW thy 'SELF' ! Commit to BE... worth HER investment~ Conduct periodic audits!

elizamichale1 · Answer

Well i know me n my partner couldn't hav anyone better than us for each other

Jamie05rhs · Answer

That is my goal. That is what I intend to be! Her safe choice and her safe place.

AmeerX · Answer

I would rather be the safe choice. But remember in my country arranged marriages take place and safe choice is considered the arranged marriage.

I would certainly want to be a safe choice to someone I love then other wise. Safe choice means they were dumped so hard that they feared getting left out. I don't care. Want to call it Simping or whatever or desperate, no problem as long as she is a good person. Because get this, safe choice is just an imaginary thing

justaskit24 · Answer

For most women, other than my wife yes. I’ve often felt like the one picked last or even not at all.

Likes2drive · Answer

I know I was and since I wasn’t super handsome I was safe for her with not getting a lot of attention from women like she would from men and I was a stable person. Turns out later she was cheating on me

KittygosMeoWW · Answer

Yes, I’d say I have really good values and understanding of what a healthy relationship looks like. When I love someone I’m very giving and loyal. I’ve always been the safe choice because I wouldn’t hurt someone out of selfishness.

Yoursweetgirl · Answer

Wow, I really have never even thought about this.  I always consider myself as a jackpot for him.  I feel like he always thinks how he could pull me.

myloveforuisinfinte · Answer

I never dated someone. but I think choose someone who always make u the safe choice.

Alex-Snow · Answer

I think as long as there is trust and communication and honesty involved it (or I in this case) can be a safe choice

sage2021 · Answer

I was the safest woman he could EVER find. But sometimes that's not what he's looking for 🤷🏼‍♀️

whirled_up_girl · Answer

I'm not in a relationship but in the past I never really thought about it.

Account · Answer

Nah, I felt I was the most difficult choice, yet they still did. I commend them for that.

James_Likes_PPL · Answer

how could you love someone if you ever felt that way. I couldn’t.

strateguy632 · Answer

i haven't, i think they chose me when no options

SherwoodGladiator · Answer

Nope I don't think I'm safe for anyone, even for myself

straightmax12 · Answer

Not really. Sadly I haven't started dating. I'm still in college.

AnusNdaPainus · Answer

Nah she said I was the best she ever had and considering that she has had a pretty promiscuous past that’s a huge compliment

CozyCoffin · Answer

Honestly, if I ever do get into one, I think I would be.

CallmeTheKnight · Answer

No because I don’t let myself be used in that way. Gotta use discernment when dealing with people

Jhonrembo36 · Answer

I don't think safe is the right word. But maybe the right choice for who I am in a relationship with her.

Bubbles934 · Answer

Erm no. I was not the “safe choice” he had to work to get me and he has to work to keep me. I guess I could be as so long as he continues to work he is safe

DreamLife7 · Answer

If I felt that way I wouldn't be with them. Anyone who feels this way is insecure

FenixG45 · Answer

I always thought I was the safe choice for my partners, but apparently that wasn't the case.

Tonyblony5150 · Answer

No not at all, I was always the worst decision to make

exitseven · Answer

I never thought about it.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes.. my last relationship told me that straight up.. I was the safe choice..

Iron_Man · Answer

is that supposed to be good or bad

KrakenAttackin · Answer

Most women don't marry their first or even second choice of man.

Nikki1989 · Answer

That is very unlikely.

laly520 · Answer

yes  few times before

Phoenix98 · Answer

I’ve never really felt that way no.

HappyWoman34 · Answer

Yep.

Zestyassmf1997 · Answer

I’m not a safe choice for anyone.

summiter · Answer

My wife and I feel safe around each other

Sparkie460 · Answer

I've never felt that way

boobliker · Answer

yes and at 69 years still do

KillinItHard · Answer

I am never the safe choice, haha.

LiamJHayden · Answer

I'm always a safe choice.

litty736 · Answer

I mean if I had a partner...

OddBeMe · Answer

Safe? No I…I guess not

In_Trance · Answer

I've never thought about it

RebelisAlwaysHere · Answer

yes i felt that many times

Anonymous · Answer

I have not experienced that yet.

jaskin777 · Answer

Nope

Have you ever felt like you were the safe choice for your partner?

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How did you decide if your partner was the right person?

Have you ever felt like you were the safe choice for your partner?

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How did you decide if your partner was the right person?

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