Are men judged more than women for failing to have a relationship?

[ManOnFire]

Do you think men get more of a bad rap for not being successful in getting into a relationship? Do men get judged more for not having success with women or being able to attract?

Yes

No

[Anonymous]

Yes absolutely, girls will find guys creepy who show more interest and want to be more persistent with their interest in them. Many times, and this is the part of being a guy is you’re going to get rejected, a lot. Guys are viewed as simps for showing any sort of affection to a girl. To top that off — women and girls nowadays are confused about their own identity, and then females overthink, then you have girls who have female friends who are a bad influence in her life giving bad advice. Guys will be looked at as pussies, simps, alphas, betas all these stupid terms attached. Feminism to me is sheer evil. Back in 2016, when I was taking women’s studies in university as an elective course I was dumb enough to support feminism and what it stood for, I supported the likes of Hilary Clinton and thought most women have it tough.

Then I got older, I read more, I observed, examined and analyzed more how women behaved in an academic environment, in a work environment, through a romantic perspective of females I pursued, to even how much the average female gets paid in North America. I think women and girls assume guys get all the high paying jobs, guys get this guys get that. Feminism is an evil ideology. It teaches women and girls not to get married and have children, make a sound choice selecting a mate (ie: a partner). Obviously, with social media and dating apps and stupid platforms, tons of guys are at a swipe of a button or a button to accept cash such as OnlyFans.

There’s no accountability for women because feminism celebrated ignorance and disobedience. I don’t see girls today having good motherly, feminine qualities about them, it’s women trying to act like men which I find disgusting and a major turn off. I know some bat shit crazy feminist on GAG is going to read this and say, YAAA SEE ANOTHER BITTER ANGRY SIMP, pathetic! Yeah to any girl or woman thinking that. I don’t care if a girl or woman wants to pursue more education or be a boss for a company but don’t brag about it and don’t act pompous that you’re better then others. I can’t speak on behalf of all guys but don’t paint 🎨 us dudes all with one brush. The whole point of being a woman is showing her sexuality and love and care for her husband. But feminism taught women and girls — you’re not a man’s property. I never once thought in my mind a female is my property. However, a boyfriend or husband NEEDS to PROTECT her woman because if we don’t well where are his masculine traits? Did she take his balls away?

What I’m speaking is facts, but because I’m saying these things I will be vilified and considered sexist. Women will realize their mistakes 20-30 years from now. They will look back and say, damn, I should have owned up to certain responsibilities. A man has to own up his responsibilities and a woman does as well. If anyone thinks I’m POS or idiot for saying that, I’ll kick back and watch how people react to another Great Depression and World War. It will change the tunes of others very quickly.

[ManOnFire]

You hit the nail on the head. Many good points in here. I would also like to add that feminists are misogynist more than anyone else, which I have discussed on GaG. Feminists hate what femininity is and female traits and behaviors, and they hate women who don't agree with their idiocy - excuse me, I mean ideology.

[blueonblack22]

This was more true 10+ years ago. A single man (who was at least semi attractive) would be judged for being weird, immature, quirky, secretly “gay” and several other negative stereotypes. Women especially harshly judge single men as “having something wrong with them” given a lot of them naively believe dating is the same for guys as it is for them (not all but a lot)

But in the last few years things have so radically changed that now a whopping 63% of men 19 to 30 are single. I think more men nowadays don’t give f*ck about how other people judge them. Not say the exponential singlehood rates are good. They are actually horrible. But can you really write of all those guys with the negative stereotypes I listed above? Or maybe some of them are so exasperated with what modern feminism has done to society they are just giving up?

https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/02/08/for-valentines-day-5-facts-about-single-americans/

[blueonblack22]

Just for the record there is an old saying “misery loves company”. I am NOT at all happy that more men are single nowadays just so I can feel better about myself.

Overall this trend is very horrible for a whole slew of reasons. There is going to be more depression, substance abuse, porn addiction, etc that will come out of this. That’s BAD for society. Very bad.

However again modern feminism really is the main culprit here. And no one is going to care about involuntarily single men (given men are expendable) either.

It’s when modern women start suffering more via these trends is when things will finally change. It’s really on them. But they won’t listen to men until they realize the misery they are in is self created. Most of them don’t give two sh*ts about male problems.

Sadly that’s going to take a while.

[ManOnFire]

All true points. Don't forget that many women want men to be unhappy and to feel powerless about sex and dating. Women need power through attention and being the ones to have guys after them, so they would never want men to "have options" or be successful at attaining sex or a relationship.

[blueonblack22]

Well notice how women backstab each other. It’s like the “grenade” who will pull way her more attractive friend from talking to a guy who she LIKES flirting with her. The grenade acts like she’s protecting her friend but more often than not it’s deep seated jealousy. The grenade knows the other guy isn’t a threat to her friend in most circumstances. But she just wants to feel better about being lonely in her bed later JUST because she knows her friend is also lonely and by herself.

Now how often do men do that bullshit to each other? Virtually never. It would come off as “gay” anyway.

That doesn’t mean we are immune jealousy but we don’t let it control us. I’m happy for my long time friends who are happily married and have kids. Even for the guys who are married to women I would have like to have in a different lifetime.

[blueonblack22]

And you’re right about modern women wanting men to be miserable. This is because of three twisted reasons:

1) they are beyond clueless what it’s really like for the average guy vs the average girl in modern times. It takes mental EFFORT to understand that. Feminists broadcast all their woes on to men nonstop. Men are more than aware of female problems. But vice versa who gives a shit.

2) modern women think it’s a “my team vs your team” game. In other words they think they are getting revenge on a guy who hurt them in the past by screwing over an unrelated innocent man. There is a human tendency feel this way in both genders but men usually have the maturity and rationale to separate two different people. Especially by a certain age.

3) conniving clever sociopathic men “support” modern feminism when in reality they are just sociopaths and scumbags. Harvey Weinstein was as so called “supporter” of feminism. But these guys are often the worst of the worst when it comes to sexual misconduct and abuse. But women give them a pass because they “talk the talk”.

[ManOnFire]

"In other words they think they are getting revenge on a guy who hurt them in the past by screwing over an unrelated innocent man." - Dude, that right there is so fucking true. Never thought of it like this.

[blueonblack22]

We can point out the facts on all of this. It’s necessary to know to keep our guard up. Remember my recent incident I DM’d you about? In the back of my mind I knew beforehand that what happened was unfortunately possibility. Not the end of the world but it was very disappointing. Haven’t heard a word from her since.

But how can men stay positive and take meaningful steps moving forward? Truth is I got a bit depressed in the last two weeks. I got a sick (I think the flu is running around) so that factored into it. But I need to get back on track with hobbies, goals, exercise, etc.

Starting to feel better this week and I got plans to travel in 3 weeks.

[blueonblack22]

I recall “the one” I had a life changing incident with years ago kept on bringing up her ex boyfriend while we dated and when she broke up with me. She compared me positively to him while we dated and while that felt good it was actually a huge red flag. Then she has the nerve to compare me again to him during the break up.

What I take from that is I should have called her out back then she was comparing me positively to him. Told her that I never brought up my exes unless it was very necessary. That’s how men got to look at this incidents: how can we handle better if they happen again.

Same with that recent girl. I am not going to text her up asking “what happened?”. That would show she “has me” which is giving my power away. I got to maintain my self respect and write her off. Not contact her at all. If she contacts me again I will likely call her out and then wish her best of luck.

It’s so stupid hard to be tested and treated like this. But guys have to do their best.

[blueonblack22]

Huge gender divide on our poll. I think women might get shit from their own family for being single. They might feel jealousy from their friends who have relationships and/or their so called friends might throw slights at them about it. So that’s why they think they are “being shamed” by society. It’s usually them just being shamed by their own mothers. So that feels like “society” to them.

However the rest of the world usually looks at single women as voluntarily single if they are least a 6 or above. It’s the next wider and bigger social circle i. e. acquaintances, colleagues, classmates, etc who are much more judgmental of long time bachelors vs single females. However I believe it’s starting to change for men because so many of them are single now (usually not by choice). While it’s relieving to stop having salt rubbed into the wound these trends are also really f*cked up and very bad for society.

[TenderFantasy]

Nah. I feel like women are judged more like why are you not mothers are you not pretty enough to get a man to love you and want to marry you? Why don't you have kids? Or why aren't you married yet? Is it because you're too picky? Too ugly? ! Lord.. 😞

With men it's like, oh he's just so independent and too cool or a lone wolf. Maybe he wants to be a priest! It's because women made him this way and that's why he's MGTOW because his wife wanted the divorce and wanted alimony and child support!

So hateful and negative a lot of people are, especially to women that are not the traditional wife and mother!

[ManOnFire]

Well, hang on. Guys tend to get some pretty nasty judgment for being single. And especially if he's been single a long time, people will think he must be bad with women. And single guys have to deal with a lot of masturbation jokes.

[grega239]

Your 1st paragraph happens to me all the time. And its pissing me off

[Insecure2]

I think IT all depends on the culture. In the place where I live women tend to be more harshly judged for failing to start a relationship, even by their peers. I even Heard that U AM too old to have children now so I lost my chance in life.

[ShadezMcgee]

I think both get judged pretty equally. Take a look at the site here for an example. How many times have we seen posts talking about both genders not being in a relationship or having experienced one by the age of 30? Essentially if you are single past 30, the immediate response is that there is something wrong with that individual and they get painted in that lense regardless of the potential reasons that person may have.

So for example, let's start with men. If a man isn't in a relationship the immediate and general beliefs are the following: He is a creep/creepy, misogynistic, gay, socially weird and awkward, an incel (heavily used by women on a man if he rejects them or if he is single by choice)

For women: Feminist, independent, strong, too masculine, too combative, career focused, high standards/too picky, etc.

So yeah, it is about equal for both, but in this day and age it is more acceptable.

[ManOnFire]

True. But I still think men get a nastier rap. Think about it like this: most women who view single men that way would never date them, but most guys would still date women of the types you mentioned. And they would date them fast if the women were the ones to approach.

[SolitarySolace]

Absolutely. I’ve been single for 9 years by choice because of shitty experiences with women because of women. Everyone blames me though. They claim it’s my fault my exes all cheated on me claiming it’s because I chose them. So it’s never the women’s fault it’s always the man’s. That’s how I’ve been judged for remaining single. I’m also considered an incel or am told constantly that I hate women just because I decided to stay single after being burned so many times. To everyone else, I’m the bad guy.


Everyone understands and sympathizes with a woman’s resentment for men. No one ever understands let alone sympathizes with a man’s resentment for women.

[ManOnFire]

"They claim it’s my fault my exes all cheated on me claiming it’s because I chose them." - People always blame guys for "not seeing the signs," but excuse women for not seeing them in their own situations, even though most women know a guy is bad from the beginning but they choose him because they like that or think they can fix it.

[SolitarySolace]

Right

[MrOracle]

It depends on who you are asking.

Some people will judge women more - especially her parents if they want grandchildren. Others - especially single women - will judge men more, because nothing turns off a woman more than a man who can't attract other women.

[ManOnFire]

God, I wish you came a lot sooner cuz I would've given you MHO. This is a very good answer here.

[ArcticMonarch]

Yeah, if women don’t it’s even as endowing for them to focus on themselves.

For men, if we don’t get into a relationship or fail to maintain one our flaws are often highlighted or people question your sexuality. (Nothing against homosexuality, just not my thing)
Personally I believe the idea of dating for marriage has been damaged in our society and hookup culture has ruined love for most.

[ManOnFire]

Yes, excellent points.

[grega239]

When was the last time you heard a woman being called a loser incels for being single by choice or otherwise?

[ManOnFire]

Another very good point.

[Lonelydudewantsagirl]

Yes and it’s brutal. There is a reason why women say “all the good men are married”. Being a single man also tends to get men less respect from others in a condescending way. It’s just a brutal situation all around for us.

[ChicoFromThe305]

I think it's the same, the same shit we get, women get from their own gender, either friends, family etc lol

[NamerOfStars]

Not sure- probably not as much as used to be, if it's true.

Women are DEFINITELY judged more harshly for not having kids, though.

[ManOnFire]

As far as kids go, yeah.

[dolemite58]

Men are judged harsher for being virgins, I don’t think people really care if men are in a relationship or not.

[KrakenAttackin]

Women should be judged more, just like a man should be judged for not having a job.

[Vegasrunner]

Nah women are judged way more. Think about it from your perspective when's the last time you hung out w/ a male friend and started discussing relationships?

[ManOnFire]

Gotta be totally honest, me and a male buddy were talking about relationships like a week ago lol.

[Vegasrunner]

@ManOnFire That's a bit skewed though, as you are someone that discusses relationships, in general however men don't sit around doing that. That's one of the reasons that joke is going around about the comedian going golfing w/ his buddy and coming back to his wife.

[ManOnFire]

That is true, most men don't really talk about that with each other. Me and my buddy are very thoughtful about that kind of thing though, and he is one of few guys I can actually talk with about it.

[Vegasrunner]

@ManOnFire Correct, that's also why I site like this is so polarizing. Society isn't used to the notion of men discussing what men want out of relationships. People are only discussing what women want from men out of relationships

[Chthou95]

Yep. Women dont want men that has never had dating success. That should tell you enough

[Truthatanycost]

Who knows. When you don't care I guess you just don't notice.

[LiamJHayden]

I do not know if I et judged for being currently single, and I do not think I would care if I were.

[Dreamclouds]

Wven if they do, they are men, they should take it I mean man against the world if it must.

[laly520]

both too judged

[PrettyCrumblBb]

Who cares.