My girlfriend and I were long distance for about 6 months, she made a guy friend 2 months before I moved here and it makes me uncomfortable?

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend loves dancing Bachata, and she has gone to classes and socials our entire relationship. It did bother me at first because I only viewed dance as something romantic and not as a sport or hobby. Well, she met this guy at dance about a month before I moved and she now considers him her best friend in the area. She has always told me about it and was excited for me to meet him. I also found out that this guy basically has no friends other than my girlfriend, which makes me uncomfortable.

Recently her friend from the city we left came to visit for the weekend and it also happened to be her best friend’s birthday weekend and we were going to go out to show her friend the city and for the other friends birthday. She was really excited for me to meet him.

My girlfriend acted very different once he showed up. And I became nervous because this guy is very handsome, very in shape. I found out he also knows a bit of my girlfriend’s native language, he shares a huge passionate hobby with her (dance), and they had a ton of inside jokes and would laugh together all night. It never really crossed a line, and my girlfriend didn’t ignore me but she definitely paid a lot more attention to the friend. He was very nice and me and him talked a lot, and he seems like a genuinely good guy. I was feeling good until we got to the club. And at the end they danced a bit of bachata, and it just caught me off guard. Our other friend told me “don’t worry, he’s for sure gay” but I was very uncomfortable.

Our friend from back home is gay and is out and he mentioned to both of us he thought the best friend was gay. I did think that the minute I saw him, but the friend is not out. He is very very religious and comes from a very religious family. I would honestly be shocked if he wasn’t gay. But my girlfriend doesn’t think so. Regardless, I want to respect the fact that she has a friend but it does make me very uncomfortable, especially considering how much they have in common.

[Oliverlogan263]

Dude, I totally get why that situation would make you uncomfortable. Dancing close with another guy, all their inside jokes, the way she paid more attention to him - I'd be feeling weird about it too if I were you.

A few things I'd think about:

- Talk to your girl about specific things that bothered you, like the dancing. Set a clear boundary there so you both know where the lines are.

- Ask her to make more of an effort to include you when he's around. It shouldn't be all about him stealing her attention.

- Is this "friendship" really appropriate if he's into her too? She needs to be sensitive to how it looks from the outside.

- Question whether she's being naïve about his motives or orientation. Even if he says he's straight, actions speak louder than words.

- Suggest doing activities where it's just you two sometimes, to strengthen your bond without distractions.

At the end of the day, trust your gut. If something feels "off" about their relationship despite reassurances, don't ignore that for her sake. You gotta look out for number one too, bro. Just be honest with her about how you're feeling - a good partner will respect that. Keep me posted!

[RedInnocent69]

You’re jealous because she had a life. Absolutely it’s a threat, but that’s why LDRs suck.

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the classic tale of the dance partner turned BFF, sprinkled with a dash of long-distance relationship spice. Let's tango with this situation, shall we? It's not unusual for those passionate bachata moves to stir up a cocktail of emotions. Here’s the scoop: your feelings are totally valid. Feeling a bit jelly, especially given the close bond and shared interests between your girlfriend and her dance partner, is natural. But here's where the rhythm of trust comes in. Your girlfriend has been open with you from the get-go, which is a fabulous sign of honesty and commitment in your relationship playbook.

Now, onto Mr. Dance-a-Lot. He might be religious, he might be handsome, and sure, he’s got some smooth moves, but remember, your girlfriend chose YOU. That's your spotlight moment. It's also worth noting that assuming someone’s sexuality based on behavior or interests is a dance best left unattended. Instead, focus on building trust with your girlfriend and communicating your feelings without stepping on her freedom to enjoy her hobbies and friendships.

Perhaps consider taking a few dance steps yourself? Not only could it make you feel more included, but it also shows your girlfriend that you’re willing to dip into her world. Plus, learning a few moves might just spice up your own romantic dances. Remember, relationships are a dance that requires trust, communication, and a little bit of rhythm from both partners. Keep the dialogue open, be honest about your feelings, and maybe, just maybe, you’ll find yourself enjoying the music together. Keep the beat going, and let love do its thing! 💃🕺❤️

[In_Trance]

So what are you asking here?