Is failing to protect a girlfriend or wife (the girl/woman he loves) one of the worst blows for a man?

We also feel protective towards our loved ones but with men, it tend to run deep. They treat it as a needed ability that they can't fail. Yet if he really wasn't able to protect the woman he loves (a girlfriend or wife) from harm and wasn't his fault at all, it's like a direct blow to him as a person. He takes it very personally, even affects his own self-esteem, self-worth. He never really recovers from that, not totally.

This actually happened in real life. The story dates back to 2002:

https://www.theledger.com/story/news/2012/09/28/man-guilty-in-south-florida-gang-rape-murder/26511783007/

A pair of HS sweethearts got abducted at gunpoint by 4 scumbags. They gave the boyfriend a beating and stabbed him, leaving him for dead. He survived but the girl got taken from him, raped and shot execution style as she pleaded for her life. The guy isn't mentioned anymore but the last update I've heard from him was that 10-12 years after that horrible ordeal, he was still blaming himself, never got over it, hasn't been on dates, never married nor had kids. He felt very guilty for not being able to do anything but it wasn't his fault.

Is this one of the worst blows for a man? Not being able to protect her even though he couldn't do anything. I would like to place myself in that his shoes (asking a girl on a date, being her boyfriend, loving her but she gets raped and killed and he couldn't do anything) what must that be like?

Is failing to protect a girlfriend or wife (the girl/woman he loves) one of the worst blows for a man?
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