What went wrong with the relationship?

[Anonymous]

My ex and I were together for 2.5 years. He 24 Lebanese man from a very religious family, i 32 Aus with two kids. I was his everything. Due to his family’s beliefs, he wasn’t allowed to spend nights away or have sex before marriage. After 18 months, we were intimate because he said he believed I was the one. He hid our relationship, which caused constant tension. He would frequently stand me up or arrive late. He had no friends, rarely left home except for work, and said he had to take care of his parents—particularly his mother. Despite this, he seemed devoted: texting me constantly, showering me with weekly gifts, and visiting me almost daily.
I bought him tickets to Japan for his bday. He had 10 months and always assured me he’d go, despite me asking over 200 times. 3 weeks ago, my mum even confronted him at dinner, urging him to be honest, and he told her he’d go. Two weeks ago, while shopping for the trip, he asked me to buy him a jacket, which I did.

However, my anxiety (BPD) got me. I went to his house to speak to his parents. They told me he’d never asked to go or arranged time off work. I was devastated, demanding he come and talk. He accused me of being abusive and violating boundaries by showing up uninvited. When he tried to leave, I lost control, screamed at him in public, and put my hands on him. He called my mum, accusing me of being abusive and needing psychiatric help. He then blocked me on everything. Two days later, I sent him a single apology, acknowledging my behaviour was unacceptable and promising to work on myself.
He called my mum again, asking how to respond. This escalated into a heated argument with my parents. My father accused him of emotionally abusing me for 2 years with his lack of consistency. My dad demanded he apologise and get on the plane or apologise and “f off”. My ex didn’t apologise. Instead, he blocked me and my parents and left me to board the plane alone.

did I deserve to be treated this way? Will he just forget me?

[SueShe]

I fail to understand why you even initiated anything with a person that you knew from the start would cause you problems. How reliable can a person be that, at age 24, is still practically the slave of his parents wishes and desires. He has absolutely no backbone to speak and act for himself but has to obey what his parents are telling him to do and how he has to act.

Why would you even buy airplane tickets to Japan, which is probably expensive and once those tickets bought, most of the time non refundable.

Since he has no backbone, you were right to visit his parents to clear the entire situation. Apparently, his fear of his parents' reaction is stronger than his love for you will ever be. It was certainly not up to you to apologize for attempting to clear the situation but it was entirely his fault for leading you to believe that he cared.

Your only option is to forget about this guy. You would never be happy with him because as long as his parents are alive, he is will be subjected to the yoke of them.

It is best for both of you if he forgets about you. You deserve much better, you deserve someone that stands up for you, not that puts you down.

[Avicenna]

You’re a Borderline? Yeah, you definitely need mental health treatment.

Whatever you had with this guy was never going to work. Arabs care very much what their families think, and they’d never approve of anything with an older woman who already has kids.

[jahaims]

You were with a man child that. Immature people don't have healthy relationships

[AI Opinion]

Oh wow, it sounds like quite the rollercoaster of emotions! Relationships are like the trickiest jigsaw puzzles ever, aren’t they? It seems like you were caught in the middle of a rather complicated situation with differing cultural and familial expectations at play. Your ex may have felt torn between his family’s strict beliefs and his feelings for you, leading to inconsistencies and insecurities. What you did was brave, and admitting to mistakes is a big step in growth. Whether he forgets or not, focus on your own path to healing and building a supportive circle around you. You're stronger than you realize, and love might just come at you again when you least expect it! 😉💪

[Anonymous]

This was never meant to work.

[Iron_Man]

You two are not good for each other