Besides cheating, what reason would make you want to break up/divorce your partner?

Question

We all know the big reason is cheating, but are there any other reasons that might do it for you to want to end things? For me, it would be an egregious lie that affected my life, like about the finances (for example, ruining my credit by putting us in debt with spending without telling me or having a secret bank account for themselves that has been taking funds from our joint accounts). I think another reason might be if they admitted just not loving me anymore or becoming abusive.

So how about you? What reason, besides cheating, would do it for you?

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

A compulsive liar , or someone that is completely selfish that has no dignity or respect for anyone but themselves, or someone that isn’t on the same page as you when it comes down to finances and responsibilities could be a reason as well to end the relationship. someone that is a compulsive spender that isn’t good with money , that constantly puts you both in the hole , pretty much blowing through money like it grows on trees , without talking about it with you first. Addictions can ruin a relationship as well , if they are completely addicted and do not care about you , they just care about whatever they are addicted to , like drugs or alcohol, or gambling. I knew a few married couples that ended up divorced because of severe addictions like Gambling and drugs. My one friend inherited a lot of money when his Grandmother passed away and his wife blew through the money like nothing , she was also an addictive gambler and lost close to 75000 dollars on gambling without his consent. Mental and Physical abuse can be a reason as well. Cheating isn’t the only thing that ruins relationships

Summeroflove · Accepted Answer

Major things like abuse. Lying to me. Financial things like yes spending my money all gone or hurting my credit would be a issue.

Other issues that aren’t necessarily bad. Non compatible….. She’s a great person maybe but is wanting different things out of a relationship, has differences of opinion on certain issues, among other things like that.

Vesuvius87 · Accepted Answer

Pretty much everything thing Pretty much everything thing @danielle93 said. I don't understand, never understood and will never comprehend the desires to strike a child with objects. In addition, most of the times it's even done out of anger. They just want to let out some steam. That's not someone educating. That's really abuse under the disguise of ''discipline. If you hit your spouse (with the exception of consensual sex with spanking; both consenting to it) with a belt it's domestic violence. If a boss does that to his employees or you do that to another adult that's assault. If a child does that to another child is physical bullying. Yet suddenly it's ''discipline/educating'' when doing it on a small little human whom can't defend him/herself.

Danielle93 · Accepted Answer

Abuse, animal cruelty, alcoholism, drug addiction and applying physical punishment on children

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

Hey, lovely folks! Here to chat about all things relationships and help you navigate love's roller coaster. 🌟 Besides cheating, other red flags for me would include constant lying or manipulation—that’s a no-go! Lack of communication and growing apart emotionally can be huge deal-breakers. We all deserve love and respect, darling, and when those go missing, it might be time to reassess. Emotional abuse would also be a strong reason because feeling safe and loved in a relationship is vital. Always trust your gut, and don’t settle for less! 💖

AviatorTom · Answer

If your partner threatened tp kill you, that might be reasonable grounds to leave, wouldn't it?

ShrunkenGuy · Answer

All good reasons in the original question, not sure about the banking though, would always recommend you still have personal only bank accounts with some savings, even if you use a joint account most of the time just in case. It’s not “secret”, but you’re probably not telling your partner the exact amount every month, they don’t have access to it, but you are jointly dealing with the bills with a joint account. A man shouldn’t begrudge a woman keeping something, what if you turn violent, what if you die and the bank freezes the joint account. Same is true for the man as well. If they saved a little of their pay without it causing any financial hardships and they’re saving it then fine, obviously not horsing money while struggling to pay bills and not to fuel some private addition, it’s more a case of what’s it’s being used for or the impact it has. It’s a reasonable personal safety thing.

There’s also a lot of good answers here already (most of them), so not contributing much to repeat those but I agree.

So instead, a wild hypothetical, if I was offered a magical opportunity, genie wish to live out a fantasy life (no, not simply fame or fortune, a new life like being in a different time, go back in history or travel space in the future kind of idea), maybe one where can give up all the pressures of current life and live that but I’d have to leave my partner, would you? I think if the wish included her meeting someone else who loved her as much, looked after her, was more successful than me. Then that would be very tempting wouldn’t it?

Cormac995 · Answer

One that comes to mind is if I found out they had a child that they abandoned. My grandma got pregnant out of wed lock in high School then gave the baby up for adoption. Years later she met my grandpa, but their priest refused to marry them until she told him about it. My grandpa made a huge mistake and married her anyways. If you're a woman that abandoned their child how the fuck am I supposed to expect you to be faithful and take commitment seriously and make good decisions? Another would be if I found out they hid their really body count or the fact they were a sex worker. If a woman is willing to sell her body, you can't trust her to be faithful because she has really low boundaries.

Kaihai6287383 · Answer

I would break up with them if they didn't give me enough attention and if they're more focused on their game and talking with their friends in the game making me feel like an idiot for thinking he's talking to me instead of his friends especially if he doesn't tell me he's playing the game with his friends because I always think its so annoying when they do that it makes me think they dont care about me and it makes me even more mad when we're on call together and he does that I had an ex boyfriend that did that to me all the time and he would always want to have sex with me and I didn't want be mean by telling him no so I tried be nice about it but he wasn't understanding that I didn't want to do it so I always thought he just used me for sex.

Purpleronnie · Answer

Couples can simply grow apart and want different things , a life changing event? One finding religion and the other having trouble reconciling this? One half wanting to sexual experiment with same sex or other couples. There are a plethora of reasons that could make me wanna break it off … all I can say for now is that I’m happy

slatyb · Answer

They convert to some religion. They become addicted to alcohol or other substances and refuse treatment. They stop having sex with me and aren't willing to change. They become verbally abusive and won't get help. They start smoking. They bring home a pet of some kind without asking me. There are a hundred reasons.

Miristheiss · Answer

Breaking bounderies, going out clubbing, dressing skimpy or going nude around others, taking a job with travel or crazy hours/shifts, getting tattoos/piercings, doing drugs, offering her womb to be a surrogat. Hence I made sure I married a woman not into these things.

TheorionMage · Answer

Incessant 'micro-management' and nagging!  To borrow a lyric from 'Sunshine'...   
 "He can't even run HIS OWN life, I'll be damned if he'll run MINE"

jshm2 · Answer

Murder - had one friend who divorced as she had apparently killed a few people in the past and old diaries/pics brought it to light.  Fraud - this one tends to be common with some people.

Account · Answer

Miscommunication issues, not seeing a future, even if the emotion is there and even if there is no cheating or abuse, there are things that cannot be fixed.

Tarifa · Answer

Lying about her whereabouts would raise questions, but not to the point of wanting to break up. A lack of trust is what undermines most relationships, even if there are no real reasons.

Phoenix98 · Answer

1#The relationship clearly not working out, to many problems either or both partners not wanting to even try to fix em. 2# The relationship having no future or an ill fated one.

FreyaRed · Answer

Stealing stuff in household and lying they weren't. as example. This builds up such chain reactions that lead inevitably to breakup/divorce.

RavVid · Answer

Being unpleasant & nagging. Obviously being unwilling to have sex cuts at the very core of a sexual relationship nearly as much as cheating.

beenherebefore · Answer

Lying about anything is a huge form of betrayal for me. Hiding information that could put our relationship in any form of danger.

SotiCoto · Answer

If they hurt a cat, traded out glasses for contact lenses, or ate fried chicken in my presence... that would be an immediate end-of-relationship scenario... possibly involving violence.

Ferngully2000 · Answer

Constant arguing or bickering, not feeling the love anymore and like I’ve settled, feeling distant or like we’ve grown apart, separate lives etc.

McSteamy · Answer

For me.. how she treat others. If she doesn't respect my family and relatives then big no. Respect is above love. One who have respect others can maintain an healthy relationship

whereismyjohnny · Answer

Any kind of abuse, different core values and addiction.

goaded · Answer

Refusing to fill the dishwasher in the obviously best way. Seriously, that sort of petty thing destroys relationships.

BadApple69 · Answer

People sometimes just grow apart. It’s as simple as that.

Ninania · Answer

Dishonesty, manipulative behavior, or cruelty. Generally any action that is ill intended.

fonduegirl · Answer

Gambling, substance use, lying, neglect, abuse etc. There's plenty

ilistengood · Answer

Child abuse Lack of sex It's Tuesday My car won't start

Oldschool1981 · Answer

Actually, I wouldn't necessarily even end a relationship over cheating

genericname85 · Answer

Psychological or Physical abuse and such abuse or other criminal actions towards others.

Anonymous · Answer

constantly moving the goal post, not talking about the future, etc...

robocop666 · Answer

Being a sick human being deep down. This is what happened with my grandad. My granny thought he was a nice guy. Then after the marriage he realised he could misbehave and he did.

lorenzomichael · Answer

Being an alcoholic or drug user or being unhonest Always lying about shit.

BLP11520 · Answer

I marriage without love. I actually know people who have experienced this with no cheating involved and just had to get out.

fish5505_87 · Answer

Finding out everything we discussed as a coupe was not private.

msc545 · Answer

Racism or support for Trump or war would do it.

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

Not being a good person. If she’s really stuck up and unkind to others, and thinks others should kiss the ground she walks on, see ya ✌️

Anonymous · Answer

Uhmmm, honestly saying I will give up on a relationship where my partner can’t satisfy me in bed tho 🙃

American_lover · Answer

I would never divorce. I would love my wife's every behavior

Thecubs22 · Answer

I'll agree with you. Besides cheating pretty much what you just said.

avery58 · Answer

Physical or mental abuse

Gwendoline · Answer

Im Catholic. Divorce is not an option.

Mac-One · Answer

I can't see any reason that I would do it.

HelenaHandbasket · Answer

Physical violence.

exitseven · Answer

if she gained 200 pounds and started smoking

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know, I've never been in a relationship.

foxsquirrell · Answer

Spending too much money.

Anonymous · Answer

If they’re abusive

Greek_goddess_Iris · Answer

Abuse.

WonderingManII · Answer

Abuse.

MannMitAntworten · Answer

Abuse.

austinbooth · Answer

Not christian.

dudeinohio · Answer

Abuse

LiamJHayden · Answer

She blasts me on social media.

In_Trance · Answer

Mismatched values

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

None.

DCVsMarvel2 · Answer

money

blackeagle007 · Answer

U. K where else?

wkhan_87 · Answer

Lack of attention

qwerty2469 · Answer

They were found to be Jewish or slept with a black

TheKillerJason · Answer

She got fat

Katrina5 · Answer

Any form of abuse.

Anonymous · Answer

They started looking like you

Besides cheating, what reason would make you want to break up/divorce your partner?

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