Years ago, I was having a conversation with my cousin when I was trying to deny some unpleasant facts that I didn’t want to acknowledge and my cousin warned me very sternly saying “Don’t ever, ever, ever lie to yourself.” The biggest liars that I know are not always the ones who lie to other people, they are the ones who lie to themselves.
This fall I thought my debt was manageable and got depressed when I tried counting how much I was spending and how much I owed and than how much income I would earn, I realized at the rate I was going, it would take multiple months of balance transfers to avoid paying interest on my credit card and at first I tried to pretend I did not have debt and made a few more purchases that I thought were harmless and small, but when I counted the additional debt, I realized I had dug myself into an even bigger hole than I was already in, so I realized, there was only one way out, I had to live a life of discipline and deprivation and avoid indulgence until my debt was paid, I could not afford to lie to myself by pretending the debt would erase itself. I needed to stop lying to myself.
I knew a woman who gained around 300 pounds from eating too much and instead of acknowledging she was fat and going on a diet, she ate whatever she wanted to kill her misery and than bought make up to make herself beautiful because lying to the self about her own health condition was easier than giving up cake and ice cream, which was her drug of choice when people bullied her for her weight, so by lying to herself, she is now in danger of premature death due to obesity related causes.
My dad has been putting up with abuse by my mom for almost 40 years because he thinks lying to himself about the type of woman he chose to marry is easier than risking half his assets in a divorce and he does not want to acknowledge the woman he has lived with for almost 40 years hates him and is just using him for money, so he is stuck in a toxic marriage that I consider just as bad as death, and he refuses to get out.
This is why it’s essential you do not lie to yourself about the consequences of your actions, you must strive for self improvement and forward movement, no matter how boring or difficult or slow or painful it is, just imagine if I continued to spend recklessly and ended up bankrupt after 2 years!
Everybody is tempted but you cannot lie to yourself, you must acknowledge the truth, even when it’s ugly.