Men are human, not machines, deal with it!

[Shydude91]

It seems like society expects men to be emotionless machines, if a guy is a little shy in front of a woman he is automatically identified as a wimp, take this woman for example

She believes a guy who seems a little shy or is not able to approach women is not a real man wtf? As if only women could feel shy, insecure or hesitant.

I guess this is her type of man a manchine

Now don't get me wrong i'm not a little boy that needs a mommy-girlfriend, i believe men should protect women because duh, it's logic, we're usually bigger and stronger (physically) that's why they never mix men with women in sports, our bodies are bigger and tougher but trust me, that's about it, emotionally we're just like women, we cry, get sad, feel depressed, get shy, nervous, etc but society has taught us otherwise, it has taught us many lies.

[MrOracle]

Look, you are complaining about a biological reality. The girl in the video is simply telling you how the world works. She doesn't control it, and she's not trying to set you up for failure - rather, she's giving you the knowledge to succeed by telling you what women are looking for.

You're like a guy who wants to drive a powerful exotic sports car but is upset that those cost $150,000+, and you don't think it's fair that all you can afford is a 1995 Toyota Corolla for $2,500. Well, TOO BAD - that's the reality of life. But that doesn't mean that you can't drive an exotic supercar one day - it just means that you're going to have to dedicate yourself to earning (and saving!) the kind of money it takes to drive one. And lots of guys who are no better off than you are with your 95 Corolla eventually own that supercar - because they WORK FOR IT and make sacrifices to get it.

Getting girls is no different. Sure, you may not have been born a gorgeous movie star with a ripped body, a square jaw, a deep, commanding voice, and a ton of natural charisma. Well, neither were the vast majority of the rest of us. That doesn't change the fact that it's what women respond to, so if you want women, you have to make yourself attractive to them. You can't change your face or your height or your overall body shape, but you can work out, you can dress better, you can earn a good living, move out and get your own place where you can have some privacy, and you can learn to be confident around women - and that will be enough to get at least SOME attractive women interested (or, at least, not immediately disqualify you).

Sure, that takes work and effort and sacrifice and requires that you change some of your thinking - but that's the reality. And, yes, some guys are born with all of those things - no one said that life was fair. Still, if you want those girls, you CAN get them IF you are willing to do the work. If not, you can keep driving your Corolla and continue to be single and/or date 3's who constantly borrow money and create a ton of drama for you. The choice is yours.

by the way, women have to face many of the same kinds of issues. Not all women want to spend an hour or more every day to do hair and makeup and take care of their skin and shave, etc. And most women aren't comfortable with casual sex or being sexual outside of a committed relationship. Then there's the pressure to go to college and get a career - which mostly needs to happen during the same period where she is at peak attractiveness and peak fertility, but can't easily focus on her personal life.

We all have struggles and pressures. You get to decide what your priorities are, but if you choose your own personal comfort over the difficulty of making an effort and changing your ways of thinking, you don't get to complain that other guys get the rewards of their hard work and you don't. That's life, and YOU get to deal with it.

[Shydude91]

So your point is that women don't like shy guys?

[MrOracle]

A small percentage do like shy guys - but since girls rarely make the first move, then if the guy doesn't, then chances are that even if she likes the guy, they'll never date or get together.

But this video is talking more about girls with a higher-than-average social value - the kind of girls that get hit on fairly often - and you have almost zero chance at one of those girls if you can't approach them with some confidence. That's just the way it is.

[Shydude91]

So even if i made an effort and approached them, they would still see me as a loser because i'm not confindent talking to them even though i had the balls to approach but since i'm nervous and stuttering in front of them they get turned off?

[MrOracle]

You solve that problem by getting LOTS OF PRACTICE. Go out somewhere (maybe pick a place that you wouldn't normally go to) and start talking to girls. This way, you don't have to worry about your reputation in the places you normally go (if that's a concern for you). Don't wait and try to find the perfect girl - you aren't trying to get a girlfriend, you're just trying to get comfortable having conversations with women you've just met. Expect to be rejected (though you might get a date or two), but remember that you're just getting practice. Once you've talked to your 20th or 30th girl, you'll realize that you're WAY more comfortable than you were, and when you are back in your regular places, you'll be able to talk to women much more easily.

[Shydude91]

Yeah, i guess you're right, i can change anyone can, with effort and determination, i'm making a mountain out of a mole hill.

[lightbulb27]

why downvotes?, he's right. do what he said...

[HikerDude]

White knight

[JSmuve]

Ya it's sad. I saw one question asking whether girls would date insecure guys and the answer (limited sample size, of course) was pretty much no. And I'm like, geez, and women wonder why guys are always closed off and don't talk about their feelings. It's because apparently we're not allowed to. Now, granted, dealing with someone who's consistently insecure is annoying. Like, have you ever had to deal with an insecure girl? They're impossible and super annoying. But everyone gets insecure and needs reassuring sometimes, even guys. So if a girl looks down on a guy needing reassurance then she's, quite frankly, trash, and I wouldn't want to be with a woman like that because she wouldn't have the qualities I'm looking for in a partner.

[Lela247]

Well something to also consider is how the question is asked. Everyone does not think in the same way. Some girls have experienced extremely insecure guys. Those that become possessive. While some other girl might think of it lightly like “oh he just has a small insecure. That’s easy to overcome.” There’s levels f insecurity that people have nderstamd. So you have to clarify before assuming.

And let’s be honest, it’s nit cute for a girl to be insecure either. It’s hard. I was very insecure and even my own boyfriend and I had to fight together to get over it. He even told me “we can’t be always bringing this up. I’m practically with you all the time.”

My last boyfriend was insecure. I helped him through it. But it’s definitley tough and no, nobody is entitled to help you. Someone else could have their own problems or simply, they do not have a place to speak. Not everyone understands the situation and for many, I’m sure it would be better if they kept their mouth quiet.

I hope most girls don’t just overlook their boyfriends feelings though. If my boyfriend needed reassurance, I would definitley do all I can to prove anything he’s insecure. We both agreed that it’s ok to ask.

As far as the girl in the video, it really depends. I’m not a hot chick. I’m just an ok somewhat cute girl. And I actually dated dorky guys. So shyness is no bother. But I don’t always want to initiate things. I want to know he likes me back. And yeah I do want to know that I’m being protected just I hope to do my best to protect my boyfriend.

An example:

We were at a local rock venue. People started to mosh (run into reach other hard). Me being petite and he is talller and bigger, he got in front of me and put his forearm out so I wouldn’t get hit, despite I was in the back lol )

Another time, my boyfriend, our friend, and I decided to walk to the corner store just down our street to grab some snacks. We were all crossing the street, but this driver (he either didn’t give a crap or

[Lela247]

Was on drugs) drove when he wasn’t supposed to (red light on his side) and BEFORE he even hit my boyfriend, I pulled my boyfriend by his shirt backwards, away from the car.
My boyfriend got mad and was like “you should’ve let him hit me. We could’ve sued! “ 😂

But that driver was definitley on something.

Regardless we both got each other’s backs. I guess we’d kinda like to know that. But I don't know I’m also just awkward girl and definitley don’t know what others want 😂

[Lela247]

Another night, we walked to the store also. We have this like meth hospital or something nearby so we do have not th beets people in our area. For now we just can’t afford to move anywhere so we are working till we move. Anyways, a guy was walking in zigzags or as if he had no control of his walking. My boyfriend pulled me aside.

Another example is, my mom and I go to Mexico. And people get away with crime there. If my mom and I were threatened by a man, we both would suffer. Even a guy who doesn’t work out could be stronger than both of us. Our punch is not equal to his. And that’s a biological factor too. If my dad were there, I’m positive he could protect us.

If you look up “should men and women do the same workouts” you could find information about how guys will retain more things than girls and vice versa. We are just biologically different. Period. You can’t stop that.

[Lela247]

Excuse the typos. 🙄 my iPad liked to autocorrect things even if it’s spelled right smh

[Ellie-V]

I’m not sure what women need to be protected from. We don’t live in a hunter-gatherer society anymore and it’s not like war is at our front porch. The only dangers women face is our own bullying and some sexual assault. But men can’t and won’t always be there to defend the strange lady from the random asshole. And sometimes the assault happens from people we already know. And men can’t always be there to break up a chick fight because most dudes these days would just record it and post it on their social media. Women don’t need protection and even if that was the case, it’s not like we’re going to receive it when it matters most. That is the world we live in.

Everything else I agree with though.

[Shydude91]

Yes, you're right but i mean if i was your boyfriend, i should care about you.

[Ellie-V]

Caring for someone and then protecting someone, from world of physical danger aren’t exactly related.

[Shydude91]

Ok but you wouldn't like to be protected by your boyfriend? If no, why not?

[Ellie-V]

Protected form what? 😂 that’s my point

[Shydude91]

Good point, sometimes i think we're in a jungle or war.

[Ellie-V]

We’re really not 😏

[Shydude91]

So you would date a nice shy guy?

[Ellie-V]

Yeah but how is that relevant

[Shydude91]

Because i wanted to know, i thought all girls found shy guys pathetic.

[Ellie-V]

Your thoughts are incorrect

[Shydude91]

But you heard what the woman in the video said right? She says women don't want shy guys, she thinks we're geeks and losers, that part hurt me.

[Ellie-V]

Who made her the spokesperson for all the female population besides herself 👀

[Shydude91]

True, she just sounds like a dumb cunt lol
She kinda thinks shy means wuss which is very wrong, she is indeed stupid.

[9teen]

''emotionally we're just like women, we cry, get sad, feel depressed, get shy, nervous, etc but society has taught us otherwise, it has taught us many lies.''

This is where you went wrong.
''Scientifically, it has been proven that men tend to use the left side of their brain, which is where reasoning lies, whereas women tend to use the right side of their brain, which is attributed to emotion. This is what gives women the greater ability to comprehend people and express their emotions more efficiently.''
“Men have significantly lower levels of prolactin (a hormone found in emotional tears) compared with women.”
'' Research has shown that women often score higher on emotional intelligence or empathy tests than men''
''A global study of 55 cultures found that women tend to be more emotional, agreeable, extroverted, and conscientious than men.''
“Women are more likely to develop major depression, anxiety disorder, and post-traumatic stress disorder, all of which are related to emotional dysregulation”

Of course, men feel emotions, but not the way women do. They use different parts of their brain as shown in the figure. We should not forget that women work on a totally different hormone than men. Estrogen makes a woman more vulnerable, this is needed for her nurturing nature. Testosterone makes a man protective and aggressive (not necessarily violent). Men are more likely to get furious than sad when something bad is happening, unlike women. Men are just made differently to conquer. We would go extinct if it weren't men who fought, defended and protected. We would literally go extinct if they behaved like women. They are made to handle hardship. A man doesn't show much of his emotions because his brain is focused on solving the problem and get done with it. The male brain does not see the point to express their emotion and cry about it. Women, on the other hand, express their emotions because it causes emotional stress and she isn't wired to automatically solve the problem immediately. This has again to do with her nurturing nature.
''These data suggest that men and women respond to stress differently, with women experiencing greater sadness and anxiety, while men show a greater integration of reward motivation (craving) and emotional stress systems. These findings have implications for the gender- related divergence in vulnerability for stress-related disorders, with women at greater risk for anxiety and depression than men, and men at greater risk for alcohol-use disorders than women.''
I think society is teaching us now how men must be like women. Why can't we just embrace the differences? I don't mind that males are the dangerous sex. It's necessary.
Maybe this is going on because the testosterone levels of the average male drastically decreased compared to other era's where it was higher. The feminization of men is what's going on now.

Figure. ''Gender-dependent hemispheric asymmetries in emotion
regulation pathways.
(A) In females, the left, but not the right, amygdala shows strong resting-state
connectivity to a widespread network of ventral prefrontal, temporal, and parahippocampal
regions. In males, the reverse is true. (B) The left amygdala is activated
by negative emotional stimuli in females, but by positive emotional stimuli in males.
(C) Major deficits in social, emotional, and decision-making functions arise from
left-hemisphere lesions of the amygdala or ventromedial prefrontal cortex in females,
but from right-hemisphere lesions of these structures in males.''

[Shydude91]

I guess i'm a feminine guy then.

[englisc]

Could be low testosterone. Testosterone effects these things too - tends to make you feel more shy and anxious, more emotional. It can be fixed with proper diet and exercise unless its a medical cause such as hypogonadism in which case its treatable with TRT. Maybe get your testosterone levels checked.

[Shydude91]

@englisc So it's normal for women to be shy and anxious but not for men?

[savan93]

I just watched less than 2 minutes of that video and decided I was done with that woman.

Although I'm still a teenager, as a female, I would say she's just wrong. I think the whole "protective" thing in men can be cute and all, but I don't think its necessary. And the whole geeks are losers? I personally love geeks and nerds. I've got a crush on one right now, haha.

I've never really been a "traditional" person when it comes to relationship roles, I suppose, but I think being in a relationship should be a safe place for men to open up and show their emotions.

I personally don't need a "strong, confident" man. In my standards, your personality matters above all else. I like sweet guys who I can have fun with and I just enjoy being around.

I wrestle with my crush all the time and sometimes I win, sometimes he wins. I don't care if he's supposed to be the "physically strong one". I will win and he will accept it.

Some girls are shallow, y'know? Some boys are too.

The most important thing is to be yourself. There's a woman out there who's looking for someone just like you, I'm sure.

Shy guys are cute😜.

[Shydude91]

Wow, you are a blessing for beta males like me.

[savan93]

You just have to be yourself! And maybe it may take a while to find the right person, but that's simply how it is sometines. You should never have to change yourself in order to impress a crush.

Doing something a little extra sometimes because you feel like it is sweet, but you shouldn't have to keep up a facade for someone to like you.

It's kinda like makeup. I don't wear makeup because I think its stupid to waste money on making my face prettier so people will like me more. But I know some girls wear makeup because they feel more confident and stuff. It's kinda like... don't like someone more when they are wearing makeup to when they aren't.

Everyone has flaws, but love is finding a person who has flaws and accepting them as they are. Being shy can be both a flaw and a strength, depending on the situation. I'm shy too, so I get it, haha.

Good luck, and I know you'll find someone for you! You just gotta wait. Sometimes the most important things in our lives appear when we least expect them.

[Spawnface]

This shit right here. Stop. This is what women don't want. Forget about not "Being a real man". No one has time for that (Other than psychopathic women exacerbating all this gender conflict crap and we'll soon discover that not all people are sweet, innocent little angels)

Like, women are fair to want this because men would want this equally. Don't bring your crap on us. Like, we ain't going to change the world just so you can deal with your feels bruh! I tell you, you gotta deal with yourself, if you are too shy, thats your problem. Forget about the pyschopaths, theyre intentiomally trying to be single forever, forget about there being some gender war. Just fix yourself. But dont be too extreme, you have to accept it and overcome it. Thats just a part of growing up. Like, you dont want a mommy girlfriend but its the mommy girlfriend your asking for.

If its hard and you need help go find a friend to help you through it. Go talk. to a family member or fibd some way of being able to cope with it better. Dont expect to be born an impervious robot, you can have feelings but you got to overcome them. Dont not have feelings, learn why you have these feelings and fix the problem to. why theu are there.

Again, forget about pleasing psycopaths, its never going to happen. just do you.

[ObscuredBeyond]

I find some women don't usually respect me until I'm right in their faces, giving them a list of all their flaws, and making them feel smaller than a headlouse. Still doesn't win them over to my side; but at least they learn not to poke the lion.

The ones who AREN'T dumb cunts are usually keepers - as friends. Rare is the one that can also be a lover.

I can be confident around a woman; but my full openness has to be earned. If what little initial trust I give is betrayed, she'll learn that I wasn't holding back to be timid.

I was holding back to be POLITE (and avoid persecution from nosy third-party busybodies, who won't hesitate to rob you of reputation and employment over rumors they themselves started. Hard to sue them if you're too broke to afford a lawyer!)

It goes back to another double standard of today: men are supposed to be strong and confident; but also spineless and not have claws to defend themselves with when a woman doesn't play fair.

You can't have it both ways! A porcupine is not a pin cushion! Mistake them at your peril! Men are expected to be way more patient, ladies. But don't be the fool that thinks this means they don't have limits - or somehow shouldn't.

[lightbulb27]

We are Sperminators... and "Weh'll be back!"

joke...

ok yes, it's tough being a male! I divide this simply into Godly realm and animal realm. In the Godly realm, you may get some grace for being nervous and such. Animal realm, you are ditched fast... that 10k year old female emotional mind can quickly filter out emotionally weak from strong.. it means survival to her and offspring. Fact she has 100k in the bank and can outsource everything and shoot any bastard that threatners her is irrelvant in that emotional mind. That gal above is both, and she is saying point blank.. I won't accept weak! better believe her and all the others... and she's got Godly training! Can't overrule those emotions, not in your lifetime.

Tought to be male, but you have to work on your inner self. It is ok to show emotion like empathy and concern, love, charm! ah!!!, but it is always from a position of strength, I'm in control, and I got this. She can't handle that negative emotion, sad, mopy. Show proper emotional energy, she will respond well, you will win many to you.

[Anonymous]

Dude. No. You need to know your customer base. I presume you'd like to get with a hot girl, no? And you're upset because those girls seem to assign you a lower value due to your shyness and lack of confidence? Well, think of the problem from her point of view. Being a hot girl, she has LOTS of guys chasing her. So she has OPTIONS. She can choose a guy who is fit to protect her, which is part of what she wants in a man because, as you so eloquently put it--"duh, it's logic." Okay, so which guy will she pick? The guy who isn't afraid to come up to her and start up a conversation? Or the wall-flower guy who stares at her like a creep from across the room but is too afraid to approach? And if you think of it from her perspective, it ABSOLUTELY makes sense that she'd screen guys like that (among other screens). Sure the wall-flower guy MIGHT be just fine, but why take the chance? The odds are better with a confident, socially well-adjusted guy. So that's what she chooses.

The upshot of all this is, if you know what you really want (say, a hot girl) and you can understand what THEY want, you'll be better placed to improve yourself in the right ways to deliver it, and THAT will her more likely to choose you.

Good luck man!

[Porcelaine]

Lol not all women are like this. I would never think of someone a wimp just because they are shy, man or woman. All that tells me is that they either care too much of what others think, or they need to work on their confidence.

[Shydude91]

You are very intelligent woman.

[Anonymous]

Because part of protecting women is making them feel safe by acting tough and strong, don’t you notice women will leave a man as soon as he gets too emotional? That’s because she doesent feel protected by him anymore, it sucks that our emotions have to take a sidestep to make women happy but it’s just how it is, for example for 1 whole year I stood by my ex girlfriend through a lot of tough times she went through but as soon as I hit a rough patch it got too much for her and she abondonded me, men are strong or women will leave, simple as that

[Lela247]

Oof sorry to hear dude. Sadly there’s people like that.

[HikerDude]

The reason there are so many mass shooters is that people fuck off guys who are troubled. It's a joke to them, right up to the point that people are dead. You have to be a robot or act like one to get along as a guy.

[smølf]

Men should protect women you say... from want?

Sex dynamic is complicated and can't be rationalized verbally in the way you expect it to be.

If she doesn't feel any attraction to guys who seem shy or is not able to approach her, then nothing you can ever say or do will change her mind. She tries to express with words, what she feels (even if irrational).

Is she wrong, yes of course she is, but when have attraction ever been based on rational, logical or even fair decision making?

[John_Doesnt]

Speak for yourself, I am almost completely machine. Just 3 more upgrades and I will no longer have any humanity left.

[lili123172]

It's not nice to view men as machines. Then again, we have society and ourselves to blame for teaching boys how to behave. This kind of view teaches the wrong things to boys.

[Anonymous]

I think it's you guys that want to believe you're indestructible machines that girls might fall head over heels for.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Nope, its women. Women want men who don't feel, that's why they refuse to acknowledge men as human beings (just look at how we are portrayed in media, how we are treated when we are victims (i. e. we are not allowed to be victims) etc.). I mean your response is pretty much evidence of this. He expressed himself, you immediately try to shift blame back to him and men in general. That's the usual in fact, we are expected to stay in our lane, keep our feelings to ourselves and if we DARE ask women to empathize with us we are "pathetic/virgin/neckbeards/bitter/asshole/misogynists/etc/etc/etc/".

[Anonymous]

Men are definitely ATMs

[lili123172]

That's funny

[Anon-ymous1]

Um... I didn't know that concept was a point of contention. Don't know where "deal with it!" is coming from.

[es20490446e]

Women approach themselves, and you can approach them too.

Anybody can approach anybody.

[Muhammad1999]

i dont agree with the emotion thing , we have emotions but we aren't as emotional as women.

[Shydude91]

I am.

[Muhammad1999]

Being emotional is really bad , since this world is so awful , women are safe 7 with being emotional because society finds it normal and helps them , but men need to work on it on their own , i can also say I'm somehow emotional but not as emotional as women , but I'm physically very strong so that's somehow a balance in me

[Shydude91]

I need a strong woman

[DDpsy]

That woman is completely right on all points. Great vid,

[Anonymous]

The sad truth is the world doesn't give a fuck how you feel. Especially when you are a man, men are the most discriminated type of humans nowadays

[juan101]

don;t listen to women they are stupid

MGTOW