A Serious Conversation About Nude Photos and Selfies

Let’s have a little conversation about nude photos/selfies, shall we?

A Serious Conversation About Nude Photos and Selfies

Since virtually the dawn of photography, the camera lens has been pointed at nude women. That’s what we humans do when we invent a new technology: first we ask, “Can we use this technology for sex?” then we ask “Can we use this technology to hurt other people?”

Personally, I think the first question is a normal, natural progression for the introduction of almost any technology. In just the line of photography, think of how Polaroids changed the game; no longer having to get photos developed by strangers opened up what people felt comfortable taking pictures of. Same goes for at-home printers which can print more and higher-quality photographs than the Polaroid. Same goes for people scanning body parts on copy machines.

A Serious Conversation About Nude Photos and Selfies

Humans have used and are using technology to sexually explore and express themselves, like it or not, so we have to adjust socially to the existence of nudes and sexual photographs between consenting adults that were never intended for public viewing.

While I acknowledge the existence and validity of asexuals, lots of humans like sex, and there's nothing wrong with that. There’s nothing wrong with not liking sex. There's nothing wrong with liking sex, and if all parties involved are consenting adults, who cares what they like?

It is a complete violation of human decency to release nudes to an audience for which they were never intended. It is a further violation of human decency to acquire those nudes by unethical means.

Can we use this technology to hurt other people?

Which brings me to the second question: “Can we use this technology to hurt other people?” This impasse is among the most disgusting parts of human nature. The desire to hurt, manipulate, control, get revenge seems prevalent in many humans, and I think the way forward as a species is to wipe out these characteristics in ourselves.

Nudes between consenting adults hurt no one. The release of nudes to a public audience is a horrific act, a sexual violation.

If your response to private photos being made public against the will of those in the photograph is, “wElL, sHe ShOuLdN’t HaVe TaKeN tHe NuDeS,” I would like to personally thank you for issuing the Red Flag that lets me and everyone else know you’re fine with sexual violation if you think it’s “justified,” which, newsflash: it never is!

Even if I accept the premise that taking nudes is a “stupid decision,” a “stupid decision” still does not justify sexual violation!

I can't believe I have to explain this

What consenting adults do is NO ONE’S BUSINESS, and if you’re okay with their privacy being violated because you didn’t personally like what they were doing, you’re on the wrong side of history. We’re trying to move past that judgmental nonsense as a society, mmmkay? And, I’m sorry, not sorry, but we’re leaving you behind.

Now, when I said, “the camera lens has been pointed at nude women,” I didn’t mean this technology acted autonomously, oh no. Let’s be real. Since virtually the dawn of photography, the camera lens has been pointed at nude women, by largely male photographers for the benefit of a largely male audience. And is there anyone alive who would actually, reasonably contradict the sexualization of women in advertising is prevalent in our society?

But since women obtained the technology to point the lens at themselves, people have been like, “wHy DiD sHe Do ThAt??”

A Serious Conversation About Nude Photos and Selfies

Misogyny is a powerful force, and you don’t have to not be a woman to hold it. Any person of any gender can hold misogynistic views.

If you’re mad because a woman has taken a nude selfie but you acknowledge and accept, even tacitly, the sexualization of women for profit in our society, that’s a misogynistic view you've got yourself there, I don’t care what your gender is.

Representative Katie Hill

In the specific case of Rep. Katie Hill, there are accusations of sexual relationships with people with whom she had an inappropriate power differential. That is a whole different ball of wax. What I have been saying here is related to nude photos/selfies in general.

A Serious Conversation About Nude Photos and Selfies

There is nothing wrong with sexual exploration and expression, even when that involves a camera. There is something fundamentally wrong with exploiting that exploration and expression, with degrading and shaming consenting adults engaged in consensual activities.

TL;DR: “Why didn’t she just not take the nudes/have better security/do things differently?” is the new generation’s “What was she wearing?” It’s revolting. Quit it.

*steps off soapbox*

#nudes

#selfies

A Serious Conversation About Nude Photos and Selfies
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Lightning8
    I hope those images are supposed to be public lol.

    I don't know if the morality is as black n white as it's describd here though. Maybe it is but I feel there is more nuance to what we should consider sexual violation against someone's will. I won't say publicising someone's private images is right. It is certainly wrong. And I also won't say that two wrongs make a right. They absolutely do not.

    What I will say is if something terrible happens to you, think of that pain, regret and guilt you feel as your brain searching for the solution to the problem, even if it isn't obvious that you're at fault. That's you taking responsibility to figure out what you can do to either stop the problem now, or prevent it from happening again later.

    I said that to say, as a society, not just young men, but young women too have collectively lost a lot of morality, tact, etiquette, ethics and so forth. Posting someone's nudes without their consent is wrong. Period. When it happens however, do you ask yourself why someone feels that you have wronged them enough that they should want revenge? I ask that because infidelity is something that depends on what the individual considers betrayal. And nobody opens up their sexuality to you, for you to then betray them. You have to get to know and think of the other person whom you are invoking and using their sexuality. That's just fair. But with masculinity and men being constantly bashed and criticized while usually uplifting femininity simultaneously, we seem to have ever decreasing empathy and compassion for the male experience and boundaries of our men, down to even those one dates/mates with. So we don't dive in enough to really understand what our partners actually consider betrayal and cheating, let alone living our own lives respecting that; there are universal principales in cheating, but it is a misconception that cheating is a simple "one size fits all" act. And cheating/betrayal is sexual violation.

    Again I'm not saying posting someone's nudes is right or not an act of mysoginy. I'm saying that not only should we never do that, but we need to realize and look at all the ways we sexually violate our partners, and never do those things either.
    Is this still revelant?
  • CaptainKaraoke
    This is an amazingly well-written piece.
    This has all the hallmarks of being written by a reporter or columnist.
    I commend you and agree with you one hundred percent.
    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Girls

  • SocialNinja
    I think, as when we do anything, we must evaluate the risks and possible outcomes of our actions.

    We know in this day and age, almost everything we do, can be shared and seen by anyone. Ofcourse we shouldn't have to worry about people violating our privacy and disregarding our trust.

    Ofcourse, we should be able to trust others... But we can't a lot of the time... So I think we have to keep that in mind. It isn't right, and hopefully things will change, but we have to consider every outcome and if we can deal with it.
    Is this still revelant?
  • Thank. You. Having sent some questionable pics of my own lush beauty out into the world, I'd be horrified if a disgruntled former amore displayed them for public consumption. This is as violating as exposing love letters or private phone conversations. It's defacing something that was beautiful and private.

    In another post, I disclosed that I keep all of the unsolicited dick pics sent to me and send them to others who send me their unsolicited pics. Am I wrong for this?
    Is this still revelant?
    • Assuming anyone that has received your nude photos received them consensually, there is a key difference between those photos and unsolicited dick pics. If you were sending your photos to people that didn't want them, I think you relinquish control of those photos.

    • Agreed. Thanks. I felt bad for a second

    • Thanks for MHO

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What Girls & Guys Said

516
  • MlleCake
    Not unless yer getting paid.
  • I dated a guy who was in a band. The drummer of the band kept a nude photo of his ex girlfriend on his drum set. The girl in the photo was my friend. I went to a rehearsal and when the drummer went to the bathroom I took the photo and walked out.
  • Magicstar
    If someone shares with another person, it should remain between them unless otherwise specified. I personally delete after receiving, reviewing, and digesting. They shared something of themselves with me, I should honor that.
  • sindicated
    Just wonder did you receive express consent from the women in the pot above? If not you are guilty of the very thing you claim to be against.
    • These are stock photos, not private selfies.

    • sindicated

      To my understanding even if it is a stock photograph the rights are owned by someone, that someone having ownership of that material unless otherwise expressly stated.

      A mentality that it is available publicly is not the same as it being in the public arena of ownership and use. The people who put the content out there might do so for specific use and only receive compensation based upon that use. If they are open content then great, but if not...

  • October808
    Yes but because of how they share them these days, they get stolen by others for ill purposes. People didn't steal photographs en masse until the internet appeared. I still feel that people should pass a test before they can use the internet responsibly as I was using it before the majority of the planet even knew how to.
  • Sha84
    these are matters of personal choice and should remain so. Political Correctness has gotten out control by listening to people that want to control others actions for self esteem issues
  • HarrisSteve
    The sudden need of being approved and appreciated might be a psychological disorder. Today people seek instant gratification which has driven people to an brink of collapse.
  • MannySimms
    THE problem is that humanity has sex as it's number 1 drive and that's hurt the planet more than anything. Overpopulation, right? We need to evolve.
    Post a pic? What if Daddy sees it? He just might.
  • Smegskull
    Freedom to take nudes is just freedom of expression/freedom of speech and should be treated the same way. Taking what people say in private and using it out of context is slander, taking people's private photos and doing the same thing should be too.
  • Nikki001
    Only few people she me naked, the lady in the mirror, my doctor, my waxer , and my girlfriend.
    • Twenty2

      I envy all of them!

    • Bigtone

      Well if we where dating seeing each other naked is normal

  • Calebm88
    I think its great to be cute enough to flaunt your jewels
  • BIGGESTD39
    Honestly I'd rather have it a surprise like a gift on my birthday I just can't wait to get home and unwrap
  • Bigtone
    I think if a woman or man wants to take nudes n send them. That's their choice and I don't see a problem with it
  • jaggu143
    Really Nice one.. .. What you said is 100%true...

    Now a days max. Boys and girls sending each other their nudes..
  • fgalvan
    I've received requests and sent but one rule is never put your face in the pick.
  • OddBeMe
    Hope all the women’s pics you posted gave their consent.
  • Dean269
    I do not share private pics of my partner
  • loveslongnails
    I like to just say: "No, they're stupid".
  • RebeccaSJ
    I've done them for my man.
  • malik25
    Nice topic!
  • keanuee
    Its sexy i like sexy/am sexy sony not
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