Why do a lot of men dislike the modern independent women thing?

Question

Just something I’ve observed. I’m wondering why they don’t like it.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Have you personally been traumatized by years and years of mistreatment by men? If not, then I don't understand the connection here.

Some other users have already given you good answers (blue anon 45 who started with "You're mistaken" is spot on, and LazerBean summarized the reality of the issue very well).

Any adult, male or female, who feels the need to proclaim they are "a strong and independent" person has issues that makes them unappealing to normal people. Being independent is essentially just being a normal adult, and feeling the need to tell everyone you can tie your own shoes and wipe your own ass just screams "I am a very insecure person". It's akin to a teenager saying "I don't need a parent because I know everything".

Women who say "I am a strong and independent woman" tend to be very insecure and have a chip on their shoulder, which is a bad combination and a clear indication they won't make a good partner for a good man. It's as if they walk around with a neon sign hovering over their heads that reads "I don't need a man". And that's fine, but the reality is that needing each other is what a healthy romantic relationship is based on. Perhaps you don't need love, companionship, emotional support and someone to have your back, but I do, as do most other normal human beings. Men want to feel needed just like women do, and saying you don't need a man is like telling us right up front that a healthy relationship with you is not an option, so we will look elsewhere.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Ugh, this question again! It's honestly surprising to me that some women still don't understand this in 2023.

Ok, what exactly is an "independent woman"? A woman who has a job can buy her own food and clothes? Sounds like a normal adult, doesn't it?

Why would someone say "look at me, I can be an adult and take care of myself"? How would you feel about a man who did that? Would that feel pretty weird? Would it make you wonder about how mature he actually is and why he was compelled to say such a thing?

The reality is that most people understand all of that, but some women still want to say it out loud to send a message about how they feel about men and relationships. THOSE women are unappealing to most men, and I don't think it's any mystery why that is.

I think normal, mature adults understand why that's a red flag. What part of that do you still not understand?

Deliciouscookies · Accepted Answer

It is not accurate to say that a lot of men dislike modern independent women. Some individuals may have personal biases or preferences that lead them to dislike certain characteristics, but this is not representative of all men. Additionally, independence is a positive trait that should be celebrated and valued regardless of gender.

LazerBean · Accepted Answer

It's not that they dislike a woman having basic adult capabilities, it's more that the women who scream that they are "strong independent women" tend to be whiney, annoying, and actually less strong and capable compared to the average woman.

Snakeyes7 · Answer

Because far too many of them think being aggressive, rude or generally unpleasant makes them "strong". It makes you insufferable and that's not strength. They dislike this "strength" because they would rather avoid it in light of better options.

Per the update: Even if all that is true, it's still a Freudian excuse. You shouldn't get a free pass because your [intert male here] was a dickhead. Your actions are yours, and yours alone, to control. Women don't take excuses like that from men so why should we take that from you?

crossdressingrihno · Answer

As a man I’m going to say this.

I’d prefer women be independent. Get your own damn groceries. Get a job and pay taxes. Fix your own shit. Continue being a functioning member of society because nobody cares.

The only contradiction to this is in a relationship. This isn’t because we prefer total subservience in our tyrannical reign over your life or anything to that effect it’s just in a relationship both sides should rely on and support each other. It’s called being co dependency or being equals.

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

I'm attracted to women who are confident in themselves and are independent thinkers, but are still nurturing and feminine and appreciate the value a man brings to a relationship.

I don't like the militant ones who claim to be "strong and independent" and yet spend all their time whining about everyone and everything, and having a hissy when other people use THEIR independence to voice disagreements.

I trust that I've made clear the difference between these two types of women. One is ACTUALLY independent, the other is just a narcissist hiding behind the IDEA of a "strong independent woman".

OfMiceandMen · Answer

I like it and prefer it. I like a woman who can stand on her own two feet, it is an attractive quality. I am not into the whole controlling the relationship deal.

I like that we can be apart sometimes and enjoy doing our own thing and we don't always have to be together. It is that much more satisfying when I do finally see her.

NostalgiaSenpi · Answer

Honestly depends on what someone means by independent.

Independent as in you have your own life, hobbies, and job - most men like that. It's a sign that she has something going on in her life that doesn't require spending all of her time with him. He'll often do his own thing, too.

Independent as in" who don't need no man" or "If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best". Hell, no. That is someone that most men would avoid. They will most likely argue with you all the time and make you feel like garbage.

Anonymous · Answer

You're mistaken. The only thing men are confused about is thier role anymore. You want to be independent, but not alone. You want him to lead, but you want to be and equal, you want to make your own money, but you want to be taken care of (or feel taken care of). You want to make as much as him (income) but you want him to prove his worth by making more than him, while simultaneously competing for said livelihood.

And before you get mad at what I just posted. 1. You asked. 2. I personally am not confused about any of this stuff. I'm just answering for men as a whole. For generations men have had clear roles. Social change is rapidly redefining those roles. And it causing just as much confusion among women as I have highlighted. You have some women who want to be near completely independent. And you have some women who want traditional roles and to be completely taken care of. And everything in between.

Weapon77 · Answer

Eh, it entirely depends on what version of it the girl is doing. If she 's doing the version where she's literally acting like a man, men don't like it because we aren't gay. Of we wanted masculinity, we'd date men. But we want femininity, and yes, there are plenty of modern independent women who are extremely feminine, so that in and of itself isn't the problem. It's the approach.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

because they associate "independent" as "I hate men"

Agape93 · Answer

The ones who dislike it, are the ones who are too lazy for a modern relationship and pine for the days where a guy could do a stupid job for 8 hours, and do jack shit for the rest of the day and get laid at night, whilst we do everything all damn day and despite our exhaustion and stress still end up fucking him without ourselves having an orgasm

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Because it's stupid. If they are so modern and independent why do they still need us for everything? Why can't we just fuck them and not call them again and that be sufficient? Are they children that need to be coddled?

It's a catch 22. If you're modern and independent then relationships make no sense, the point of a relationship is to depend on another. Yet these independent women get all upset if we treat them like oh pay your own bill, oh home intruder? You're not my girl I'm out the window figure it yourself. The second we ACTUALLY treat them as independent capable on their own adults they have a shit fit.

We're perfectly fine just having casual sex and then leave us alone. Goodbye.

If you want a relationship that shit needs to make sense. So you need to offer something besides a vagina and a job.

RingOfFire · Answer

I do not think it is so much that men dislike "independent" women (whatever that means) as that they find this feminism syndrome unattractive and associate it with a woman who has some kind of stick up her ass about proving something. It's sort of like they want to be hated by men so they can feel like victims and they go around with an attitude. That's just unattractive.

Anonymous · Answer

I'd assume some of it comes from the fact that there are complaints if inequality which is a lot better and yet. Men are still expected to approach you to ask you out. Still expected to pay. There are still issues in gender equality and it's on both sides.

There is nothing wrong with a modern independent woman. But that doesn't mean they are disliked. It's annoying if they go on about it. And a fair few are to independent andnjudy aren't good at being in a relationship. But this is also the case for men.

fonduegirl · Answer

There are a lot of pick me girls.

If there are antifeminist women who act like conformity makes them better, there are also misandrists who hide behind independent girl symbol.

So it's important to define what independence means to you.

Rockstarrrrr · Answer

You know how women hate it when guys rumble about high value men and " chase money first then women will chase after you " stuff... Well, the " strong independent woman " is like the female equivalent of it... It's like a female incel lol...

Anonymous · Answer

One thing that I've noticed they all have in common, is a faux feeling of superiority. They (falsely) believe that they're somehow special, that their lives actually aren't the complete failures they really are, and their hatred, paranoid delusions, and low intelligence are always on full display for all to see whenever they type anything at all online.

Anonymous · Answer

you mean guys on here? yea cause there's so many incels. most guys on this site don't represent the average guy. for guys irl unless you're that feminazi girlboss cunt no one cares. most guys think the tradwife thing is lame as shit and would think you're weird if you wanted that unless they're from like india or something

blissinanarchy1 · Answer

I personally am okay with it. The only things I dislike is the cocky attitude that comes with it, and the pretty high frequency Onlyfans is involved

LegendaryDater · Answer

women are warning men when they stand up and say thins that "I am not going to be in the kitchen" I am going to be working a job and this will be a partnership. They say this because men still want women in the kitchen, doing laundry, raising kids etc.

Anonymous · Answer

Because if you have to continually scream from the rooftops about being strong and independent, then you're probably not strong and independent. It's like a guy saying he has a big cock. If he has to say it, chances are it isn't true. And being strong and independent is just what normal adults do. Listening to women boast about this miniscule accomplishment is fucking annoying to men, and I would imagine some women too.

Anonymous · Answer

Men don't dislike independent women. They dislike women who boast about being an independent woman. Those women tend to have personality problems and don't know how to treat a man.

Wade12345 · Answer

I don't dislike an independent woman. I dislike a whore of a woman. I think there's a difference. Like my high school valedictorian is a genetics engineer now. She's married of course, but she's the bread winner.

lucasnabizada · Answer

For myself it's because I don't care for a woman who will value being a CEO and make big bucks as much as I care about her being a good wife and a good mother... ny woman can do as she likes, it's just not something I value personally

inhua · Answer

there's no such thing as a "modern independent woman" it's virtue signaling until they find the "right guy" or until shit hits the fan

Anonymous · Answer

There are several reasons to don't like it:

- A lot of them are feminists

- Its pushed by SJWs

- Maybe the guy prefer girls who depends on guys

- The more independent women get the higher their standards get and they are even less likely to say yes when normal guys ask them out

- Its a boring trope in movies that has gotten just as stale as mr perfect action hero like Jack Bauer.

slatyb · Answer

They are afraid that if a woman has a choice, she will leave. They feel more comfortable when their partner is financially dependent on them. Then they can behave badly without consequences.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Imagine having someone make a regular point of telling you that you're a garbage human being because of your gender and that they don't need you around. That's why.

jshm2 · Answer

It's the attitude, in most cases  You'd think those men were responsible for their issues. When in fact most men they meet have nothing to do with their problems.

JSmuve · Answer

It's because "modern independent" women completely disregard an important emotional need that lots of guys subconsciously have, which creates for emotionally unsatisfying relationships.

serious · Answer

Nothing wrong with being modern and independent but if the woman negative qualities in combination with this then no man will like such a woman

TheUniqueOne96 · Answer

Some women that say that just use it as an excuse to bash men, so it get's a bad rep, that's why.

Zayed_ · Answer

I just do but not because they doing great for themselves but because they aren’t used to being independent they start thinking less of a man’s worth.

Unlike independent men who still care about women when he’s successful.

Gibbons44 · Answer

Many have beem taught to oppress females. And the good ones - genuinely nice guys - grt chastised on forums and in real life for not supporting narcotics and prostitution.

PatriceONeal · Answer

Dating a career woman is like coming home to another boss. Guys don't want another challenge or to be changed by you. Once women figure that out we'll be fine.

Guanfei · Answer

Considering your question, and your update, it would be a waste of time to answer you.

OddBeMe · Answer

Because it means more work for us. Get back in the kitchen.

Alex8736 · Answer

because from my observation they get very intimidated by an independent woman who can hold her own and make their own decisions and a lot of men are very needy and insecure when they look in the mirror. just saying

RavVid · Answer

We don't. They just don't have attributes we look for. Doesn't mean we hate or dislike.

Anonymous · Answer

Do you mean men of a different religion culture though

Guy13 · Answer

The are female supremacists and that gets old as they are emulating men.

DavidRaul · Answer

No we don't hate them. We love that type of women who can stand up for themselves

Anonymous · Answer

Less power over them probably. They can no longer take advantage. Sometimes feminists can go too far though too. Healthy people will appreciate a balance.

es20490446e · Answer

We need to make a distinction between a strong independent woman, and a woman that is combative.

Wendy_1986 · Answer

Maybe it's because they still have bigotry in their ideas, and what they're focusing on now is equality between men and women, and it's no longer an era of male sovereignty. They're not used to the modern independent woman in power

gorydetails · Answer

Because it’s usually code for “I’m an annoying cunt”.

ryancg · Answer

I don't know, I'm all for people doing what they wanna do.

Anonymous · Answer

We don't, we just dislike modern women (not all) in general.

LimitedBenefits101 · Answer

Insecure 304s scream "strong independent women"

grega239 · Answer

Because tgese women are the same ones who run to a man when it gets tough

notwoke · Answer

yeah, no thanks, Independent strong women = everything has to be my way, enjoy your solitude

TallAnon · Answer

Do we? I think we only care when it's brought up every 5 seconds.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

I don't I love it especially how independent they are

RandomGuy1030 · Answer

I love independence. I can't imagine anything else

Timid-guy · Answer

I don't, as a beta male i'm all in for female power and dominance over males.

YourToy69 · Answer

Independence is great. Becoming a bitch is a problem

Anonymous · Answer

because they prefer a women who know her place and will stay where she belong

Leopard23 · Answer

Modern independent women =Adult.

dinojames22 · Answer

A gunslinger

Why do a lot of men dislike the modern independent women thing?

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Why do some men hate independent women?

Why do a lot of men dislike the modern independent women thing?

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Why do some men hate independent women?

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