Boyfriend invites himself for dinner all the time?

[Anonymous]

I really like eating and spending time with him, but sometimes he is just rude!

Last week, we were with friends, somebody asked him if he wanted a ride home, and he answered "nope, I'm eating at X's place". It was already 7pm (I always dine at 8), he didn't warn me before AND my dad was going to my place for dinner too, and had already cooked the meal, for two, of course. So I had to get my boyfriend some leftovers I had. He stayed for 30 minutes after dinner and went to work.

The next day, at 7h40pm he texts me saying "just got home from work, make dinner for two". So I had to cook him something AND wait until he got here (an hour or so).

He lives alone, but his house is getting some work done, so he is spending the month at his mom's. He eats SO MUCH. Sometimes I even have to hide food (honestly) because I tell him not to eat something (because I'm taking it to lunch at college or because I bought it to put on my dinner the next day) and he still eats it!

I think that if he had spent the day with me, I'd gladly cook dinner for us, but what's the deal with getting home from work, taking a shower THEN come to my place to have dinner? What can I do?

[bengi]

At the end of the day it's only food, if you're so up tight about food then what else are you up tight about... easy solution, always buy more food and always expect him...If that was my boyfriend, I would gladly feed him every night and not complain...but I come from a lebanese family, where we love to feed people and we make food for 6 people when we only have 2 guests lol.. I guess it's different with other cultures...

[Asker]

That's not even the issue, I love to cook, plus every time I cook something I can take with me (like cake!) I take him a huge piece so he can taste. My problem is when he warns me on the last minute and expects me to fix everything.

[madhatters4]

sounds like he's entitled and sees you as a caretaker. perhaps he applies to stereotypical gender roles since he seems to think it's fair to assume that you will just do certain tasks.

what can you do?

communicate. Tell him the issues as you see them and explain how you feel like you can work with him to fix stuff

[ryanontario]

maybe try and get him to at least buy some of his own food and bring it over to cook or eat so he's not eating your stuff , that might improve things a bit

[palek]

Sounds like he has a dent in his head and one eyebrow.