Couples Can't Agree On Monogamy

I think I've got monogamy. I must have caught it from you people!
- Sex & The City

Monogamy. Some love it. Some avoid it like the plague. But everyone discusses at some point in a relationship.

A new study conducted by Oregon State University showed that in 40% of couples, only one partner says the couple agreed to be sexually exclusive. The other partner said there was no agreement.

Wow. Really? This is a MAJOR communication issue in 40% of couples!

Monogamy does not guarantee protection

If a couple isn't open & honest, and one party isn't monogamous, both people are putting themselves at risk.

While many see monogamy as a way to protect against disease, researchers Jocelyn Warren and Marie Harvey said this study showed that many couples are misjudging their partners’ risk behaviors. “Miscommunication and misunderstandings about sexual exclusivity appear to be common,” says Warren.

This can be dangerous water to tread. Past research has shown that as a couple's relationship becomes more steady and stable, condom use tends to decrease. If a couple isn't open and honest about their relationship, and one party isn't monogamous, both people are putting themselves at risk for STD's. Warren and Harvey’s study showed that even if a couple has a mutual understanding of monogamy, almost 30% had not stayed faithful.

Commitment is the key

There were many variables included in the study - married and non-married couples, couples with children and couples without children, and a range from 18-25. Oddly, couples with children were LESS likely to have a monogamy agreement in place. Married couples were no more likely to have an absolute monogamy agreement in place than other couples.

The only constant? Commitment. Couples who saw their commitment as strong were ultimately more likely to be monogamous.

Warren said couples become monogamous generally for emotional reasons, to show love and trust in a relationship. However, a lack of communication between couples is leading to unexpected risks.

Open communication is imperative
to your health and your future.

As a result, it is important for young people to maintain an open flow of communication. Without this, young people involved in relationships are putting themselves in jeopardy. Even if you believe that your partner is monogamous, insist on using protection. It may be a difficult topic to bring up, but it is imperative to your health and your future.