I recently stumbled across a used copy of a really interesting book by journalist Jack Kammer. He interviewed several different female therapists, activists, professors and others.
One of the women, therapist Laurie Ingram, said that women often flatter themselves that they're more emotionally mature than men, and that women's emotions mature faster. But in her professional experience, Ingram thought that a large percentage of women were functioning at the same emotional level as a nine or ten year old child: a combination of deeply insecure, entitled and arrogant, and passive-aggressive communication.
I thought Ingram's comment was very intriguing, and has a lot of truth to it. Not all women, certainly, but I've known or dated many women who Ingram seemed to describe.
I've dated guys my own age (I'm 22) and I'm tired of them they're way too immature! So older men all the way. A GUY (not a girl mind you!) once told me that if a guy is 20, his emotional age is really 16 or 17 whereas if a girl is 20, she'll usually be that emotional age.
Men can separate sex from love- most women cant. Another immaturity. Most men don't want to deal with their emotions so if they're depressed they'll more likely to commit suicide than women. It is proven by statistics etc. More men cheat than women. Why not just break up with the girl? if a guy goes off a girl, he'll stop calling. Also some men will neglect their families in pursuit of career so the kids end up hating them. some men put greed ahead of their family.
I wouldn't say women are emotionally immature but I do think a lot of women wait for this knight in shining armour to "save" them when they need to save themselves. No-ones going to do it only themselves. Also if a girl has issues with her father, they tend to f*** up her relationships with men a lot. Women aren't perfect but its a bit much to say emotionally immature.
Men have the upper hand in so much in life that we're just trying to claw back our fair share of the power and gain equality! Women earn up to 25% less than men and there are less women in top management. women ARE discriminated against because we have children/may have kids. I think your whole argument is incredibly biased so its really hard to judge whether it has any validity. Any argument ought to be at least objective. in some countries, women are oppressed and have less rights than men. How is that mature on the part of men?
maybe you're just dating the wrong type...ever thought of that?
Don't generalize.....I'm a guy and I won't lay the pipe unless I'm in a relationship. lol My maturity is actually working against me. I admit it.....girls say I'm very attractive, but when it comes to dating nobody is interested because many of them want to go out in their skanky ass cocktail dresses hoochin it up and don't want a relationship. That's immature. - A month ago
Answerer
Sure I'm generalisating but only to make a good point. I respect your point but there's no need to disrespect women's attire or behaviour with such immature derogratory terms. Cocktail dresses are perfectly decent. Most girls I know want relationships but women should have the option to have flings too, just like men have always have. Women are becoming more alpha and financially independent-sometimes I think this intimidates some men. - 29 days ago
How is being able to seperate sex from love, an immaturity?
And the amount of girls cheating on their men is climbing.. You're wondering why a man wouldn't just break up with a girl? Girls do the same.. The way you just mentioned men, and not women.. is just blindly generalizing and bashing. - 28 days ago
I think that sometimes, everyone is emotionally immature, be you a man or woman. Men have just as much potential to be insecure, arrogant, and passive-aggressive as women do. It's good that you didn't generalize and say all women; I think that it depends on the person, the individual. Some women are whiny, spoiled & manipulative, and even sometimes engage in pointles, childish bullying and gossiping, but the same can be said about men. Sometimes it does have something to do with outside influences; media, childhood, status, etc. But it's always up to the individual as to who they want to be. I just perceive adults as older kids, really. I think that we all retain some childish qualities throughout our lifetimes. It helps to know when it's time to put away childish things, though.
Well society makes girls insecure by enforcing the importance of unachievable perfection and beauty. And if you are seen as pretty it makes those girls have big heads and so they feel like they should be given everything like Megan on Megan wants a Millionaire. Then the passive-aggressive communication comes from the idea that men don't like aggressive women. They shy away from aggressive women because they don't feel as masculine around them. And if they are aggressive the women is call arrogant and a bitch. So I blame girls emotional levels on guys because guys wants girls to fit their unattainable imaginations yet refuse to try to be what a girl might want them to be and get upset about the whole situation. Guys need to get over their double standards.
Interesting ideas about the entitlement. I think you're on to something.
FYI, numerous scientific studies show that women have _far_ more power to influence men in relationships than the other way around. See Kammer's book for more detail, and also note that women file for divorce in 60-70% of cases. - 3 months ago
Answerer
Yeah once in a long term relationship girls tend to have more influence because the men become passive but the initial start of the relationship the guys have more control. - 3 months ago
And if so, what's your basis for concluding that Ingram's master's degree in social work, and her 17 years of professional psychotheraputic expertise are somehow misogynist? - 3 months ago
Question Asker
I'd also like your opinion on another issue:
Another of the women Kammer interviewed said that charges of "misogyny" were often thinly-veiled attacks designed to shame men into silence, or to deflect from a woman (or women's) moral flaws.
Any thoughts? - 3 months ago
Question Asker
And do you think it's sexist that my MacBook dictionary contains the word "misogyny" but not the word "misandry"?
Yes or no, would you be willing to elaborate? - 3 months ago
Answerer
I don't think that women are more mature than men or vice versa. I would like to see her scientific evidence suggesting that woman are operating on the level of a 10 year old. So only men can mature past the mindset of a child? Ridiculous. I don't want to shame men into silence. I only mean to point out what I find offensive and sexist. I expect men to do the same. Oh, and yes I do think it is wrong that misandry is not in MacBook dictionary. - 3 months ago
I think women are extremely emotionally immature. Sure women mature faster- maybe. I dated a girl who was very insecure, sought acceptance through sex, and developed an elitist attitude. I pampered her, treated her well, basically put her on a pedestal- and it got in her head. She is arrogant, and very passive-aggressive. Someone unfortunately is going to hurt her emotionally very badly, possibly as bad as she hurt me. Maybe that will teach her to be more humble.
Dude, 90% of North Americans are functioning at a 6th or 7th grade level, in just about every respect. Men, women, the elderly. It's mental. Go to Europe or Africa or Asia if you want to see how well-developed people behave.
I think this is very interesting and does make sense from my experience. I also think this might attract a lot of hatred from those of a 9 year old emotional maturity level, as do many of my answers.
I thought Ingram's comment explained a lot of dating headgames, too. Playing hard to get reminded me a bit of tossing pebbles at a playground crush, then running away and calling them a poo-face - 3 months ago
Dela111 you actually know what you're talkin about man! I don't think girls are understanding the 10yearold maturity level theory, it just covers the way they act insecure and passive agressive etc, not their actual intelligence, an amazingly intelligent woman could still be insanely immature like others but they choose to go with their insecurities and just flip at the idea and call us misogynists which further gives evidence to this theory - 3 months ago
Answerer
Yea, can't live with em, can't live without em I guess. - 3 months ago
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