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kurkjianb

I don't want to like him, but I do

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kurkjianb (Age:18 to 24)     When: 11 months ago
Views: 1142     Category: Behavior

so um I really like this guy, he doesn't like me, so I tried to stop talking to him, but then he was mad at me because I wouldn't talk to him, but every time I talk to him, I like him more, and I don't want to cause he doesn't like me, were just friends. Should I jsut stop being friends with him? he's really sweet and I don't want to hurt him, but I don't want to like him or I'll get hurt when he goes out with another girl. what should I do?


Update: ya
i know he doesn't like me
cause he told my bestie who he does like
three girls I know
i wasn't one of them    11 months ago

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    From Guys  
9
From Girls  
7
 

What Guys Said

aspartacus
22  
aspartacus      When: A month ago
Ok so here's my story (maybe it'll help you) So I like this girl and I also think she doesn't like me cause she has dated other guys but every time she breaks up with them she starts to talk to me like if she was flirting. We are very good friends I've known her for 6 years and she's probably one of my best friends. So I tried not talking to her in order to make it not hurt so much when she dates other guys but it really doesn't work because I see her every week at church and if I see her with another guy I get very sad and jealous. Also when I stop talking to her she also thinks its something personal and gets mad at me.

So me advice would be to be a bit more courageous than me and talk to him about how you feel . I know that if she felt that way about me I would definitely like to know it. And even if it hurts don't stop talking to him cause its not going to make things any easier.
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anabur
771  
anabur      When: 10 months ago
Does he know you like him like that? Because if he isn't interested in you, but gets mad if you don't talk to him, you're eventually gonna have to get it out in the open. It really just depends on this: if you keep talking to him and liking him more, will it be good torture or bad torture for you? You know what I mean? If it's gonna just make you miserable and frustrated, and ruin your life in a way, do what you can to cut him out of your life...even though that's really hard too.
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Arfoo
640  
Arfoo      When: 11 months ago
Either way you should let hm know.if he's your best friend, he deserves to know
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Answerer Telling a guy is that you like him will not hold the same results as flat out telling a girl that you like her.

The guy won't push you away and/or freak out and run away - 11 months ago

Arfoo
640  
Arfoo      When: 11 months ago
okay.if some girl's best friend asked me who I liked. I'm sure I woudln't be a dummy and I'd catch on. I would probably intentionally not include the woman who I do like.

If he gets mad at you for not talking to him, it's probably because he likes you. You won't know for sure, but you need to tell him how you feel about this.

If you tell him the whole situation and why you don't want to talk to him, instead of just saying you don't want to talk to him.nothing good will come of it. Tell him how you feel. If a girl tells a guy how she feels, the guy will not be creeped out unlike the girl in the reverse situation (who knows why.)

Another thing you should know is that.for guys, if I'm not mistaken.liking someone means she's cute I want to get to know her - for girls, I'm pretty sure when they say they "like" someone, it's OMFG liek I"M in WUV.my heart is sinking. If a guy feels that way, he will often times ponder if it is love.

If he wants to talk to you he is interested in you.hence he likes you.

That's how I see it anyway. You're not bad looking at all, judging by your picture. If he doesn't like you even a little bit, he must be gay

In middle school, I liked someone a little bit, but I didn't want them to know for whatever reason probably just the feeling of security.so I lied about liking someone else. I couldn't somehow just ask the girl out or whatever. . Soon, I found myself out of touch with her and I realized what I lost. Don't let this happen to this guy in case it's this situation.
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Question Asker Haha, that's funny
i know sometimes girlsa can be like that but he's more like my best friend, and has been since we were 4, and I'm not the lovey dovey type, it makes me sick to my stomach - 11 months ago
Answerer Well if you feel this way...then you already like him, so being friends or not being friends with him will be irrelevant to your feelings. If he goes out with another girl, regardless if you are his friend or not his friend you will still feel a tad bit jealous and/or uneasy. Hurting him will only hurt yourself

My advice to you is that you let him know some how. The best relationships come out of loving friendships; and that's true to an extent. It's how you make that relationship that matters. - 11 months ago

JustMe2008
1541  
JustMe2008      When: 11 months ago
hey did you not see my reply to the question where you asked about that list thing? I told you, that list means shit. I used to do that too earlier. Shy guys do that all the time. Let him know how you feel.
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Question Asker Um ya idid k thanks
but prob
im too shy and I gues that's my problem but ya - 11 months ago

Little-Hippie
5756  
Little-Hippie      When: 11 months ago
There's no rule saying you can't get him to like you.

The thought probably just isn't very prevalent in his mind.

Make it prevalent.
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Romanticguy1988
1007  
Romanticguy1988      When: 11 months ago
How do you know he doesn't like you?
Don't stop being his friend. . . Rather tell him how you feel.
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Question Asker No can do
im way too shy
well
im really not shy
just about tellin guys
i like them is all
i can't do that - 11 months ago
Answerer If you are 100% positive that he doesn't like you.
If you are 100% positive that you can't tell him how you feel.
Then there is in my opinion two options -

Being his friend and live with the feeling until it disappear (which might probably take quite time)
But if I were you I would stop the contact with the person. . . But that is only what ''i'' would do.
Think what you want and only. - 11 months ago
Question Asker Well I WANT to tell him I like him
but I don't know how to
and not make it weird
cause I think it;s weird for girls to tell guys that stuff
- 11 months ago
Answerer Oh come on! Now I just can't agree with you. . . Why is it have to be so stereotyped that guys are the ones who gotta take whole charge of situation always. . .
If girl likes a guy why can't she tell him that? There is nothing weird in that . . to be honest it is the coolest thing she can do. Why is that guys have to take all the pressure in approaching ?
No really. . .If you feel that you would want him to know that you like him (especially when its hard for you to be only friend) Talk to him! - 11 months ago
Answerer Ps: Do you really actually think if he would like you he would tell the truth to your friend?
Lol trust me . . . We people tend to keep usually secrets to our self . . Especially the crushes.
Not mentioning he is a guy . . Girls usually talk about this stuff with their friends etc. . .
Guy not always talk about this because men are usually keeping the feelings to them selves. - 11 months ago
Question Asker K I guess, no I know ur right
but I'm willing to admit that I'm being a big baby
but I'm shy
so ya
ig uess that;s my problem isn't it - 11 months ago
Answerer As you said.
The problem is that you need to get in charge and talk to him about how you feel.
Just dropping the friendship will bother you later on. . . And if you don't tell him anything and just stay as a friend. . . It will still bother you.
So talk with him. . . The only and most right thing you can do here. - 11 months ago
Arfoo Can you play guitar? learn this song called wonderwall by Oasis and sing it to him. "there are many things that I would like to say to you but I don't know how"

Seriously... just because he said he doesn't like you doesn't mean he doesn't like you. If I had a best friend that was a girl that I liked, and her "girlfriend" asked me which girl I liked, I would definately not tell her that I liked my best friend for fear of my best friend freaking out, pushing me away, and ruining our friendship - 11 months ago
Arfoo Telling a guy that you like him is different than telling a girl that you like her.

The guy won't push you away... or he's a faggot - 11 months ago
Answerer Arfoo has a point here. - 11 months ago

preacherman
916  
preacherman      When: 11 months ago
It could be he is one of those guys that likes having girls around who he knows want to be with him. You need to be honest and tell him how you feel. Either, he will tell you he doesn't have those feelings for you, or he does. If he doesn't you may want to move on.
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alexdt100 Im with you on this one - 9 months ago

 
Anonymous User
N/A  
Anonymous User      When: 11 months ago
How do you know he doesn't like you too?
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Question Asker Cause he told my friend who he liked, and it wasn't me, obviuosly - 11 months ago
Answerer Times like these you just need to be honest. Stop running away from the problem and tell him the truth. Tell him, "Hey, it hurts me to be near or talk with you because I know you don't have feelings for me, so I'd appreciate it if I could have some time to myself" - 11 months ago
 

What Girls Said

NirvanaCobain
859  
NirvanaCobain      When: 10 months ago
dont you guys hate it when you tell (or someone else) tells the dude you like them and you feel so damn akward you eventually stop liking them or feel all embarassed? I do, lesson learned. I need to keep shit to myself
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black-butterfly
28  
black-butterfly      When: 11 months ago
Well sweetly if you wanna know if he like you ask him. It ain't nothing wrong for a girl to ask a guy out trust me because I was in the same predicament. I really was obsessed with this guy around my block and we was friends but I ask him and he told me he wasn't interested in me like that so I ended the friendship because if I couldn't be with him the way I want to then I couldn't be friends with him either.
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chocolate-lover
1790  
chocolate-lover      When: 11 months ago
and you think he would tell your best friend the truth ?!, NEVER, he knows she would tell you.

the only one he could tell him the truth, is his own best friend and no one else, this is because he is the only one he trusts.

believe me, its no better to stop being his friend, it would hurt you more than staying in contact. at least you can talk to him, and know his news.


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sammy--j
913  
sammy--j      When: 11 months ago
your not all that for sure honey if he does like you or not.
a guy wouldn't just get mad if he didn't like you or had a crush on you.
he wants your attention because he wants you,
besides what kind of guy admits to your best friend that he likes you.
maybe he doesn't want you to know
but trust me a guy don't get mad for no reason.
and trust me you will get hurt no matter what, it sucks but it happens to everyone.
just always keep your head up high.
:D
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chocolate-lover I agree with you , lol =) - 11 months ago

furnx3
83  
furnx3      When: 11 months ago
dang I am in the same exact situation. doesn't it suck? except my guy has a girlfriend.
anyway, my advice is to find another guy to like. keep your options open. find a way to confide in him and find reasons you like him as only a friend, not a boyfriend. it's really hard to deal with, and I don't even really know how to deal with it myself! it's good to know that someone is in the same situation though!
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Question Asker O yea, thanks
tried that
but EVERY guy I jsut have to compare with this other guy!
i don't know if ill ever get over him till he's totally out of my life
he lives in my neighborhood and is family friends too!
hes like verwhere I go! - 11 months ago

saklea
684  
saklea      When: 11 months ago
I am in the same situation like you right now. Just like you I try to keep my distance, because it just hurts to be near him if I can't have him. To him I think I am just a good friend. Everytime I distance myself from him, he contacts me and stuff and I don't manage to get over him. I fall for him even deeper. Everytime he fools around with me and flirts with me, a tiny part in me actually starts thinking I have a chance.

I like him and I don't want to stop all contact with him, but right now I am not able to be around him and be just friends. Therefore I try to keep contact to a minimum until I can be sure my feelings for him get back to those of a friend and not of a girl with a big crush and a slightly broken heart.

If you are sure he does not like you, then I have 2 diffrent advices for you how the handle the situation:

1) Tell him how you feel about him. Maybe he is into you as well and just hides it. If he is like you think not into you, things will get very awkward between you guys and perhaps you won't be able to go back to how it was.

2) Spend not more time that you need to with him. He won't be suspicious and you will have some time to heal. Maybe he will get mad again, but your feelings come first now. That is what I keep telling myself.

Good luck to you. Gosh, unrequited love sucks big time. I wish I would finally get over him.
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Question Asker I feel your pain and I know it totally sucks. I have to see him every day though! it made me cry once I was trying to keep away from him so much, then he was like rubbing my shoulder, ugh! he's so sweet, but I'm too shy to tell him I like him!AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH - 11 months ago
Answerer Tell me about it. I am also too shy to tell him and the fact that I see him every day in uni does not make it any better! Like this week when I was feeling down, because of a test (and more importantly him) he just took me into his arms and rested his head on my shoulder and we stood like this for I don't know how long...I almost died at that moment. He was just being nice, but to me it was like the sweetest torture of all! ARGH! It is holidays now though and I won't see him until 4th january. - 11 months ago

4u2nv
1663  
4u2nv      When: 11 months ago
see if he likes you too.
he could be yours ;]
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Question Asker As I said above,
he told my friend who he liked, and its not me - 11 months ago
Mellene 4u2nv is right - he can be. He is not married or anything, you need to be confident for this and just attract him, it might take time but he can fall for you, everything is possible if you want it!
I know how it feels, but I'm in confusing situation when I don't know anything and I'm shy as hell.

My advice for you is to be honest and tell him, but don't show you really really like him, tell it to him as you are cool if he likes another girl (which you already know BUT you pretend you don't).
- 11 months ago
 
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