Men who don't show emotion or don't "get it"....
I've been going out with a guy for 2 months. He claims that he is like me - tender-hearted and giving, but I've seen little of it. While we have things in common and enjoy each other's company (or so I'm guessing from his "I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to spend time with you" answer) I can't tell what is going on in his head. There is little to nothing that makes me believe he cares an ounce for me - even though he says he cares and that he is "falling for me" but when we talk on the phone I feel like I'm speaking to a stranger, There is never ANYthing in his tone that speaks of any softness or fondness for me - and the minute we have a disagreement or misunderstanding (even minor, which is ALL we've had thus far) he's running for the door. He's made comments about feeling "stupid" and I don't what makes he come to that conclusion. I had big reservations about this guy as I learned early on that he has gone out with a LOT of women. He even talks to his ex (of a whole whopping 4 months) who dumped HIM. He says he wants to prove her wrong, because she told him that none of her exes talk to her after they break up. And two weeks ago he even said he was "sort of" rubbing me in her face, letting her know he's found someone else (someone better, he adds). But why bother at all? Makes me think there is something there. He says there isn't, but after a bunch of instances where we were discussing her (me bringing her up, which I know makes me look jealous, but for me it is more about KNOWING and BELIEVING everything is over) it just doesn't gel. SHE is even a friend on his myspace, and yet I'm not. Does that sound right to anyone? As of this past Sunday, he said he will change it. Since he's been with me most of these last few days, nothing has gotten done, but I think he is dragging his feet. I think he thinks she will win or something if he stops being "polite" to her. WHY? NOW HERE IS MY BIGGEST ISSUE ... we have sex a lot. We both LOVE sex. I held him off for almost 2 months, so we first had sex only a few weeks ago, but it lasted the whole weekend (about 12 times). But not ONCE did he seem to care if I had an orgasm. I started thinking that maybe this had to do with all the girlfriends he's had and getting hurt (he is DEFINITELY damaged in some way). He has told me to "please not hurt him" a number of times. I've asked the same and yet I feel it is all about him. He knows that I don't orgasm during sex, and yet he doesn't seem to care. I got peeved last night over it, and he said "are you serious?" I couldn't believe it. He claims he does care and that he was just exhausted - but not so exhausted he didn't make sure HE got off. We argued about it for about 10 minutes - and in that 10 minutes he could have given me an orgasm, yet it either didn't cross his mind or he just didn't give a crap. He seems like a guy who (since he's got a big penis) wants - or rather needs - to please his woman, and yet he knows I'm not getting there. ?
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