She is happy alone. Is there any chance?

[Anonymous]

My ex broke up with me a few months ago after a 3 year relationship. Nothing messy just the fact that she felt it wasn't working out because of the useless constant bickering. She was stressed and unhappy and so was I but she opted to end the relationship where as I was happy to work on it.

I do believe that the breakup was necessary though as I needed time apart to realize what was important and to reassess my attitude towards the relationship.

I'm in my late 20s she is in her early 30s and the relationship was serious (we spoke about marriage, kids in the very near future as she felt she wanted them before she hit her mid 30s).

We had no contact for a while after the breakup and although we've chatted on the phone recently she feels she may not be ready to meet up with me in person yet. Although she doesn't want us to drift apart and wants to work on some kind of friendship she still needs to concentrate on making herself happy.

I miss her and would like to try and get back with her but I am willing to start from scratch even if means starting off being platonic and being her friend.

She is happy being single and living in her new place and I can't say I'm not enjoying my new life either. But I an still in love with her whereas she cares for me and loves me but has moved on from wanting a relationship with me.

the questions are to anyone that may have experienced this:

1. is there a chance in hell that this situation will turn in my favor if I try the friend approach and try and rekindle her attraction for me?

2. Has anyone been in My ex-gf's situation and gotten back with their ex boyfriends. Why? and how long before you were comfortable enough to take that chance again?

i don't think that time will change my mind about my love for her. she is the woman I want to be with but she also a friend I am not willing to lose. I want her in my life and believe she wants me in hers.

[limchr]

It's a hard situation. You have to ask yourself if being her friend is okay and will it make you hurt more and are you okay with that? Sometime we can't force people to Love us the way we need to be loved because at the end of the day it usually never work out. If you cherish her friendship I say go for it, trying being friends just don't get to needy with her give her her space and you just keep busy. You have to show her that you can live without her and be able to stand on your own. girls like guys that are confident and can take charge. this is the best tiime for you to find a new hobby and go out with friends and have fun, love yourself first. whne you do talk to her just keep it short and don't talk about your relationship and do not pressure her about getting back together. Good Luck!

[Asker]

Totally agree with what you are saying and for the most part its been exactly what I am doing. I've shaped up, started going out again met new women and got in touch with my friends again. I have not been putting any pressure on her and have given her all the space she needs. But I still feel the need to be with her which is the part that is killing me...

[Anonymous]

Dude, omg these are questions I want to know as well. My girl did the same to me so really I know what its like. 2 nights ago her and I spoke but it wasn't about us it was about a firmware update on something [not important] other than that after she requested to be friends she ignored me or told me she had work or she had to go out. It's such a terrible feeling to know she doesn't really want to talk but its good that she doesn't want me out of her life.

I say do like I'm doing. Just wait til she calls you freely. Don't call her for 2 or 3 weeks. Doing this you'll see if she'll call. And if she does call then right there you know she misses you. Thus having a certain chance of hope to getting your girl back. I wish you luck and Godspeed.

[Asker]

Same exact situation with us on the phone very casual talking about other people and laughing about random things and every time I suggested we meet up she would say yeah sure but not this week.

So I decided to let her know that I am in no rush to see her and but that I missed her as its been a while since we've seen each other she said she also missed me.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah she was supposed to meet me on today [the 4th] but she said she didn't think it was a good idea plus she was planning on taking me to Disney for my b-day since you get in free for your b-day but she didn't say anything about that. She was completely quiet. Right now all she wants is to be just friends, she doesn't want to be around guys right now, and she wants to be single. Something is going on that she's not telling me but I decided I'm not going bother her about it til she talks to me.