Here’s the thing, ladies. We’re not all dicks. We’re not actively pursuing you just to drop you two weeks into our long drawn-out texting conversation and laugh about it with our bros. Well, maybe some of us are. But most of us want exactly what you say you want, a relationship with someone we really care about.
The problem is that what you say you want doesn’t always seem to line up with your actions. Ok, so we meet at a bar (probably drunkenly, let’s be honest), we exchange a few laughs, a flirty look or two, and, at the end of the night…our phone numbers.
And that is when the games begin. Tell yourself we’re uninterested all you want, the truth is we are analyzing the perfect wording for that text and exactly when to send it just as much as you are. And there is nothing worse than that stupid bubble that pops up as we wait for your next line. Oh no wait, there is: when we text you a joke and you don’t respond for hours.
That pit exists in our stomach same as yours, and we always worry that most recent text will be the last.
Look, it’d be great if 2 donkeys and a couple bucks made you our wives. But it’s the 21st century, and you ladies have just as much control over whether we get to that first date as we do. So stop playing coy and start giving us some hints as to whether you are looking for a friend or something more. Oh, and make the hints obvious; we may not be dicks, but we’re definitely dumb.