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Why It Is Equality For Men To Pay For Dates (Page 2)
Anonymous
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A lot of great points made in this article. Men and women aren't the same, men do make more money and women do spend more to look good. Hopefully more feminists will write takes like this agreeing with me, and in doing so will turn more and more people away from feminism as they realise what a ridiculous idea feminism and gender equality is (or get offended at the dpuble standard that men and women should be treated exactly the same except when it benefits women, either way they turn against feminism and anti-feminists win). Keep on keeping on.
Are you being sarcastic?
No I'm not. A lot of people say that feminism isn't about real equality, that it's about equality for women when it benefits them, but not when it doesn't. You're a perfect example. Many feminists don't like to admit it and they manage to convince gullible people into believing they're actually for gender equality, but then those people read takes like this where feminists like yourself openly admit that you think men should give women money and that women should be in charge, confirming all that anti-feminists have been saying all along. That's why more and more people are starting to turn away from feminism. At least we both agree that treating men and women the same is stupid.
I would LIKE men and women both to spend the same amount of money, but we have to make revisions to the rest of the genders' fiannacial situations first. Otherwise it'd increase inequality
I don't believe that since you said in another comment you want matriarchy and for men to give women money, but let's go with that... You want men and women to spend the same amount of money. That means either getting men to spend more money on our appearance, which we're mostly not interested in (and women are turned off by overly vain men anyway, that would only work for gay men), or it would mean closing the wage gap. The wage gap exists because of choices in careers, women are more family centred than men so they're more likely to stay home, to work less hours to spend more time with family, to not work weekends or nights, they get pregnant and take time off to look after babies which men can't do, men work more heavy physical work, dangerous and dirty work which pays more. So basically you'd have to force everything to be 50/50, against what everybody would prefer, just to make sure people get paid the exact same and pay the same on dates.
Well how is it inequality to say that if men continue to care more about looks, then women should be able to continue caring more about money?
Wishing to eliminate women's preference for a provider is only equality if we eliminate mens desire for a hot chick
Neither of which will ever happen but feminists are trying to do so.
Unless we have the situation where both parties arrive with financial statements of incomes and necessary expenditure then they can split the bills according to means (obviously that is not going to happen).
Splitting the bill is the next fairest option until they are dating long enough so some sort of income fractions of the bill can be brought in. There is no guarantee that the guy is in a better position than the girl, the guy could go on one date a month, the girl could go three times a week, too many variables for a blanket decision either way. So that is why I feel splitting is fairest way. Would it be a dealbreaker probably not for me but it definitely would be registered in the file cabinet.
Okay girl 1. If paying for pads bothers you so much then just buy period panties they're reusable and you wouldn't have to pay for pads again
2. Makeup is an option, no one NEEDS to buy makeup!
3. Bras can be bought for 20$ at WalMart. You don't need to go to victoria's secret to get a bra that fits or feels good.
4. Women take fields where there is less money because we like to help people more than men do so we usually take jobs like doctors, nurses, psych nurses, and teachers.
5. Men don't have to pay for dates all the time it would be nice if you paid for some of the expenses too. I'm not going to order a 100$ plate of fancy food without paying for it, it would be cruel if you didn't think about how much of his money you are spending if he was paying the whole bill. If you both make the same amount if money and he's paying for it, I wouldn't buy anything that I couldn't afford myself.
I've read some stupid shit on gag but this takes the cake. So I'm going to give you an equally ridiculous list as to why women should pay half, hell pay the whole date. 1. Condoms 2. Deodorant (We all know men sweat more)3. A nice sporty car with high dollar rims (we all know women don't want a man in a hoopty)4. Shaving cream and razors (it is now the norm for men to be hairless. Do you know how fucking hairy I am?)5. Saving money in a Swiss bank (so if I get divorced I'm not robbed blind by child support and alimony)6. Food (men eat a lot, I mean a lot)7. Rogane (it's not acceptable to be bald in today's world) 8. Vasectomy (when the time comes when we have enough kids to feed, we get snipped) 9. Proctologist (This one makes me shiver in a bad way) etc. etc. etc. Pretty fucking ridiculous huh.
It's not always men who buy condoms.
Women use deodorant too, sometimes more than men, because women are more judged for being smelly than men. Men may sweat more but that doesn't mean they use more deodorant; their deodorant accomodates for that.
Women pay for shaving cream and razors too.
Women eat food too.
Women pay for things to make their hair attractive too.
Women use birth control.
And go to gynos.
I was being sarcastic. Why? Because this is dribble. Absolute dribble. The vast majority of your reasons listed are personal choices. Then you want a me to buy you a cookie because you don't have something dangling between your legs. All I really got from this is "I'm high maintenance and that ain't cheap so men man up and pay for my meal".
I also forgot jock strap. Jock strap cancels out bra expense. I'm a messy eater so I need more napkins than most so that cancels out pads. It's kinda of fun to play the crazy game. Thanks for the laugh.
I think the man should pay for the first date but after that it could be a shared approach. NOT splitting the bill but I'll get this one you get the next. But often times in Relationships each person shows they love the other in different ways. I do my guys laundry, cook or bring him meals when we aren't hanging out just to help make his life better and to show my appreciation for him. because I love and want to help him. I think many guys don't have a lot of ways to show their appreciation other than to pay for things. As you said, in many cases the guy earns more. if there are resentments on one side or he other, they should be discussed.
so men should pay for dates because women go to the gyno and buy makeup and more clothes than men
I simply don't agree with that. what if the man makes siginificantly less money than a woman? should the woman pay for all dates then?
i thnk the simple fact is that you can't allow your economic situation dictate how your dates go in the terms of if a man should pay for things. my feeling is if you can't afford to out on a date then don't go out. but i don't see gyno bills, clothes, makeup, or even lesser pay at work stopping women from going to the bars, clubs, sporting events, etc.
This is ridiculous. How much you choose to spend on beauty products and clothes is 100% your decision.
I am a firm believer in taking turns taking each other out on dates.
What about menstrual products, gyno appts, papsmears, bras etc
Dudes have their own shit they need to pay for too. And us having to buy Bras and feminine products has nothing to do with them. It's ridiculous to pretend they do. Some people have to pay for medications that I don't need. Does that mean if I'm friends with them I should have to pay for everything when we hang out? Lol
How about the one who invites pay, that's sounds fair to me. If someone asks me out, why should I pay, and if I ask a girls out, why should she have any expenses then.
The one who invites have to pay, that's the rule. Naturally since men usual ask the girl out, then men pays, but both genders have it's strengths and weakness in social and romantic affairs.
@smølf that's generally my rule of thumb for first dates but after that I take turns.
Nope, it's just a remainder of the chivalry thing that used to be the norm in western societies. The very same chivalry which assumed women were more or less helpless and needed a man to protect and help her. Now luckily we grew past that and know that women are not lesser than men, but are our equals. Paying diner for a woman just because she is a woman is playing into the older ideas of a man needing to provide for a woman.
Don't get me wrong, if I go on a date and I want to pay for her then I will, but it must never be an obligation.
On average women do make less than men, but on average they don't go into the high paying jobs, they work fewer hours, take more holidays and sick days, bring in less money into firms. The wage gap is a myth, there is an earnings gap but its based on personal life choices. As for the "pink tax" there's nothing more equitable than taking care of yourself as opposed to the government taking care of you because you're female.
I have nothing against paying for my date, but lets make one thing clear it's not for the bullshit reasons given above, but because i'm a freaking gentleman.
And this whole take is just an excuse because you're not mature enough for a relationship
Not mature enough for a relationship? I guess that our ancestors were too immature for relationships too then because they all went by this norm
Our ancestors? Get with the times! There's a reason why that tradition is dying. It's because people are realizing how stupid that really is.
It's not stupid, though. At least until men and women have an equal amount of expenses to pay outside of dating.
But no one is asking you to pay for those. For most of the stuff that you mentioned, you choose to pay for it.
If we are going by what our ancestors did, then you wouldn't even be allowed to own most of the stuff you have. Sure men would buy you stuff, but that is because you wouldn't be able to have a job of your own. Just stop... for real. If you don't like it, then date women. Any guy who treats you the way you expect to be treated is not a real man. Have you not realized that you are wrong. Everyone else thinks so.
If I find a woman that I really want to date, then I'd consider paying for the date. But I'm not expecting to pay for every single date. There's gotta be some give an take. I think you as the writer of this post is biased towards someone paying for your date and all the time. I get how you have to buy more products but what does that have to do with a date? A bra is underwear so it's like us guys who buy underwear for ourselves. But see, some people suggest that all of us guys should pay when I've met some women who want to pay for at least of the date or switch back and forth with me. Tell that to a feminist and see what they say. I've encountered a few who think that guys paying for every date is sexist. That's not me saying that, it was those women that I know. Soooooooo yea. I don't necessarily think that we should pay for every single date. What about gay couples who are dating? What do you think they do to consider paying? Lol
Men buy underpants but so do women, and women also buy bras
I know. I just said that in my last statement. Just because women buy bras, it doesn't entitle any special treatment. Either you don't want to accept that or you're just naive. I would expect that since you're still at a very young age. You're argument about seeking medical attention or buying bras isn't a valid one. If I want to, I could say that MOST people that work on and fix vehicles are men. So by that logic, you should be paying for your boyfriend's meal lol. If you really want to get down to it, you can answer the part about couples that are gay. First figure that part out and get back to me about your bras
Most people who fix cars are men... but most men don't fix cars
Lol you still can't accept it huh?
Did you figure out the gay couple situation?
Women have great expenses? As a 6 foot 5 male weighing close to 200 pounds id challenge that? My body mass is 2x that of my girlfriends. Combine that with a strict rowing training plan and you cansee that in any given day my calorific intake might be 3x that of her. Do you think protein shakes are cheap? What about the expensive clothes and shoes I have to buy to fit my size? My car insurance is a good 25% more expensive that my girlfriends because I belong to the male sex.
My girlfriend only wears minimal makeup and tampons aren't that expensive. Trips to the gyno? I dont come from the us but i thought that obama outlawed charging woman more for health insurance. To be honest if you're stupid enough to pay a premium for a pink razor rather than a blue one you deserve to get ripped off; Its a free market after all.
By your logic my girlfriend should pay for the whole cost of any date we go on. But no. I think ill stick to 50/50.
Women do not earn less than men, not in developed countries like the USA at least. You have outdated information. Menstrual products are sometimes provided for free at some workplaces. Women don't have to wear a bra, if it is winter, and the coat properly covers the nipples. But they can just wear hand-me-downs or one customized bra for themselves. Fashion-conscious women love to shop for clothing. That is a hobby, not a necessity. Honestly, I can just make do with a set of shirts and pants and a couple of modest formal wear from a thrift store.
Sorry, but I don't buy these arguments. And this comes from a woman. Granted, I have modest and cheap accommodations, so I have a lot of "feminine products" out of my life. I also don't wear makeup. I like the way I look naturally.
I disagree.
If a female asked me out, I would expect her to pay since she made the offer. If I asked someone, then I would be since I made the offer.
That is courtesy.
And just because women make less doesn't mean they get a bye. The two individuals may not even work in the same field. Her 30% less still might be more money per paycheck than his 100%.
Again, sorry, no byes based on gender role.
As a matter of fact, if we seek equality, then the term gender role needs to go bye-bye in the first place.
You're talking about women buying accessories men already do I'd they when stand a chance of getting laid lol. Not to mention the fruitless hours of self-improvement, working out, spending on clubs, bars, hobbies and other places you can supposedly meet women (but actually can't). But you don't hear us bitching about it because we know that money is not being spent on you. So you bought a few cosmetics that you probably wear everyday just to look good to your friends anyway. So the world is a sexist pig (by the way, men usage to work harder, dirtier jobs on the whole). None of that is our fault directly. Seriously, screw your misguided and misapplied notions of equality.
I'd pay so that you can get into a mental institution. The stupidity needs to be fixed asap.
Stupidity of that level can't be fixed. Don't waste your money lol
@ihatethiswebsite So no hope? Can I buy her a cat or two? She's gonna need some company :/
I have 5 cats already, thank you
HAHAHAHHAHA ^^
5? So you've already accepted your future of loneliness?
"On average, women make less money than men"
Citation needed.
"and also are required to pay many more expenses than men, from menstrual products to bras to clothing (it is considered unacceptable for women, but not men, to rewear clothes) to gyno appointments to makeup"
Which women have the options to buy & could just buy less if it is necessary.
"until we acquire the ideal world in which men and women make an equal amount of money"
It already exists lol
"men and women are required to pay an equal amount of expenses outside of dating."
Their expenses are the same, majority of women just have the issue of buying the entire store, men just go in get what they need and leave.
"Their expenses are the same" really? Men have to pay for gyno appointments and menstrual products and bras?
I was referring to thing that both men and women pay for, such as clothes, food, certain luxuries, etc.
If you're really that mad, just tone down on all the excess stuff you buy.
Whoever did the inviting should pay , I think this is common sense , most people provide for their guests at parties & social functions ( ie weddings ) . Women do NOT get paid less than men , certainly not here in the UK as this is a breach of law , most women tend to work less hours.
I'm a FT working single dad ( thank f*** today is a Bank Holiday , UK public break ) , therefore I will NEVER be dating again due to lack of time , money ( your take reinforces that ) & more importantly , I simply can't be bothered with BS & drama , those 2 little people in my picture come first , plus from a female POV , no woman will want a 45 yr single dad , be real here !! Young women have overtaken young men in earnings if anything nowadays.
I don't wear makeup or expensive clothing and even while only buying high quality organic pads at a whole $5.99 a month, I can definitely still afford to take turns paying for dates (or spliting the cost) and when I can't, I suggest getting together to do free things.
if you feel the need to have men pay for everything when you go, cool whatever, that's your thing. but don't make lame ass excuses on behalf of all women in the process. ;)
I mostly agree with what you said about what equality is. I disagree when you say that women have to pay more for clothes and make up. You don't HAVE to pay for that stuff. It's like saying that, as men, we have to pay much more than women do for video games because we play more.
So while I agree with you when you say equality does not mean we are the same, I disagree when you say it's normal men pay for dates.
Well yeah but video games are an option and pads tampons gyno appt etc are not Options
Then how did women survive before they were invented?
OK women will just go bleed out in public, perhaps on your furniture, using no menstrual products and then you can tell me more about how they're "optional"
Damn it women ! Just hold it until you get to a toilet !
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Mouahahah sorry... couldn't keep a straight face... :-)
Still don't see why we should always pay for dates
You realize that the blood comes out without us controlling it right? Like a nosebleed.
Yes, I was kidding. That's why I was laughing. I was referring to what a sexist American politician had said. I can't remember which...