A confession

My first love was an unexpected sweet 14.

Of course, you hear the saying "love is bittersweet". Well it is, but the person I fell in love with is shockingly incompatible.

I met him online, fell straight for him and asked him out when I don't ask guys out (NEVER in my life even now). I met him real life 3 months later. He was tanned, hot and just the kind of guy with looks, brain and body. But didn't I say we were incompatible? Yup, because do you know how old he was? 24. I told my close friends about him but they gave me a lecture for it. Honestly, they don't know how it feels to be in love.
"Love isn't something that you can have when you want it, nor does it let you choose the person to have it with."



Love isn't something that you can have when you want it, nor does it let you choose the person to have it with. Love is blind. Love is like gripping sand where if you grip it too soft; or try to hold on to it too fast; or grasp it too hard, love flows away. If you haven't fallen in love and lost it, you won't understand what I mean. I never understood love phrases until I experienced love.



But the problem wasn't only age, it was our future. He was a drop out from high school and what am I? I have a promising future. I was born in an educated family where everyone looks up to me. I cannot even bear living a poor life because I got used to being pampered. I told myself, I cannot love him. Even if I do, I cannot be with him because otherwise I won't be able to achieve my dream. He knows what the problem was and that's why I've found out that he's been hanging out with different girls every night. So that did it. We broke up.



But this isn't what love is about. Love tells you how it feels to lose something. It changes your attitude and your life usually for the better. Say if I haven't suffered the bittersweet of love, I wouldn't even have the enthusiasm to pursue my dream. I'd still be the clueless 'love is sweet' girl who was inexperienced and clueless.

Pain isn't all that bad. I love who I've become because compared to others who hasn't fallen in love, I feel as if I'm at a higher level. I can help them with their problems. I can see what they can't.
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What Girls Said 9

  • I couldn't let go off him and he knows it was illegal, he doesn't even want me but I just kept stringing along. I guess looking back, he must have thoguht I'm annoying?

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  • What he did was illegal, no normal guy dates a girl of 14. As gorgeous and mature as you may be, you will still look considerably younger. I bet he has a totally different story to tell his mates of the whole affair, about how he stole some young 14 year old's virginity. And I bet to him you were never even in a relationship, just one of the many girls he was stringing along.

    Sorry if that sounds bitchy, but when you say there was a different girl every night how can you kid yourself?

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  • I don't mean all problems, and I don't just go asking eveyrone what their problem is.

    i only help when I feel like they should be helped..

    and I might just be self-centered..but I'm just another person in this world?

    but hey, I don't mean to sound like bitch or something but I'm just speaking out of the corner of my mind

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  • You to suddenly see the big picture and solve all their problems? Try to take this one experience as a single step, not the whole stairway. :)

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  • That excluded you as an excuse to 'break up with him'. Right? Was that anything more than a huge crush on your part?

    I'm sorry, I'm sure you're a lovely person IRL but this article just makes you come off as smug and self-important. Yes, you personally might have learned from your experience, but does that really make you 'at a higher level' than everyone else? Everyone's experiences are different. You may sympathise with people 'in love' or crushing on others, but does that really enable...

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  • Oh, dear. So basically this 'relationship' was your 14-year old self smitten with a charming handsome older man who 'didn't even want you'? You kept hanging on to him even though he clearly had his own, seperate life, of which you don't seem to have been much a part of. You spent far too much time idealising your future together, and suddenly his being less educated than you (might one day be) was enough to convince you that he wasn't worthy of your time, and you used his social life that...

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  • I think what you did is right.personally,i think that in order for a relationship to work out is when your are at par with each other be it intelligence,social status and sort.I think I heard somewhere "i rather fall in love and lose love than never in love" Being in love giving us expereince, making us more matured and giving us clear insight of what we want in the future.Things that don't kill you will only make you stronger eyt?Great to hear that you are so positive about this matter

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  • Yeah, material over love, that's what I chose, and I got yelled at for that.

    I'm a bit selfish.

    And he so wasn't a pedophile, he desperately wanted to forget me

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  • Wait you were 14 and he was 24. um, that kind of makes him sound like a pedophile.

    and this love conquers all, age is meaningless stuff you're expusing is king of negated by the fact that you like, can't love him because you don't want to be poor? that's choosing material wealth over love.

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