I'm a middle-eastern boy who likes a middle-eastern girl who is two years younger than me ( I'm in college, she's in highschool). I work part-time with her and we've only worked together a few times, and I wasn't interested in her too much at first. she didn't seem to be my type in the beginning, but she's been telling me a lot of key things about herself. My first impressions were that she's gorgeous but potentially high maintenance, into really popular guys, and so forth. However, she seems to make it a point to tell me things about herself whether we're talking alone or within a group. She hates guys at her school/guys her age, she hasn't had a boyfriend before, she says she's shy and is only really outgoing at work, she told me she isn't a 'popular girl' at school, and other things that contradict my initial impression of her.
I'm now very interested in her as she seems like a gem. She also plays lacrosse, which is cool.
I'm sure I come across as a 'different' guy to her. We've talked about how guys can be dumb when getting girls drunk at parties and making out with them, and so forth. I'm sure I have this vibe she doesn't get from other guys, which is good. However, she's tricky because, while I've never seen her be shy before, she states that she is and maybe the mixed messages I've been getting are a testament to her shyness. She usually seems outgoing, but sometimes she'll walk away or won't hold eye contact. However, we usually DO hold eye contact and so forth.
She also hugged me the last time she came into work, but so did the other girls she came in with.
I'm thinking of asking her to get coffee before we go into work, but I don't have a way of contacting her. She doesn't use her facebook, and I don't have her number. The work environment has put me off of 'coming on' to her by asking for her number and such. I also don't want to seem like just another guy by moving too fast, but I feel I should move fast (at least to the dating stage) because I am confident.
I could go on and on about this. I feel really intoxicated by this girl (proof: my sex drive has diminished. lol), and I crave to hold her in my arms, but I'm not going to be naive enough to pretend that my feelings are all that's needed to get this relationship going. She's generally not interested in a relationship now and that's because she's not into guys her age, and has had bad experiences in the past with them. Also, while not a big deal, the fact that her facebook says "Single" and "looking for: friendship" is kind of a 'tell'.
How do I make sure I'm the guy who sweeps her off her feet? How do I show her I'm the one for her, as I believe? If we get a coffee or something, I'm thinking of turning up the heat physically (touching) and seductively, and hopefully that won't be seen as moving too fast. Heck, the fact that I, a college guy, is taking her, a highschool student, out for a coffee is attractive. No? :P
Most Helpful Guy
Dude I know a girl exactly like her and trust me I know what you mean. The main thing is to communicate. Considering she shares her life's pointers with you, should give you a major clue that she's considers you out of all the other guys. That's a good thing. Seemingly, you are really into her. Now the thing is you gotta make sure she knows that you will stick around long enough to let her come out of her shell. I agree with LeftEndtails with the "Sticking around" part. The minute you give up on her, she'd think of you as some jerk and probably won't be interested.
From what I am reading, she's interested in you, the fact that she's shy is unwillingly stopping herself from being so open and seductive toward you is a clue on all by itself. I think by letting you know of the fact that she is shy and in all telling you about herself is a major hint that she secretly is interested but is wanting for you to make the move. She's trying to make you understand that she isn't like other girls; the ones who can are outgoing and preppy. She is hoping for an open-mind.
Now, go ahead and ask her for some coffee (As you have said) and if she does turn you down, stay put. To show her how you can be the guy that sweeps her off her feet? That would be in the fact of actually listening to her and like I said before, sticking around. Add in some fun as well ; Joking around, being confident (which you are), and adding a flare to the day to day convo is a great start. Go for it.4